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Clips from Weeds - Shit Highway (S03E03)

"Previously on Weeds."
Weeds
"I got busted. Head of campus security at Valley State."
Weeds
"You just got jacked."
Weeds
"Here. This is yours."
Weeds
"If you need protection on campus, just ask for me."
Weeds
"You still owe me 150 G's, lady!"
Weeds
"How am I supposed to put food on my table if you keep upping my debt?"
Weeds
"Get a fucking job."
Weeds
"Chop that shit up. Move it."
Weeds
"Can you grow here?"
Weeds
"Hell, yeah. It's perfect. Shame it's all gonna be for U-Turn."
Weeds
"Silas Botwin, you're sentenced to six months' community service."
Weeds
"Injuries such as yours may have rendered you unfit for duty in the past but times have changed."
Weeds
"- What? - Welcome to the army."
Weeds
"Your battle buddy is like a Siamese twin."
Weeds
"You're gonna shit when I shit."
Weeds
"- Why are you doing this? - I laid everything on the line for you,"
Weeds
"and you fucked me."
Weeds
"Kesheshian says "goodbye"."
Weeds
"- Peter? He's dead? - Yes!"
Weeds
"I'll tell you how you can help me now. Make the bags lighter."
Weeds
"Agent Fundis, DEA."
Weeds
"I'm here to talk about Peter Scottson."
Weeds
"Erm, we broke up,"
Weeds
"me and Peter Scottson."
Weeds
"He hasn't come in to work for a few days, and we haven't heard from him."
Weeds
"It's unusual."
Weeds
"Oh, well,"
Weeds
"I don't know."
Weeds
"- We broke up. - Look, Mrs. Botwin, I'm his partner."
Weeds
"- The one who burps? - It's reflux."
Weeds
"When did you last speak with him?"
Weeds
"Er... A few days ago. He brought oranges."
Weeds
"- Do you want them? - Why would I want them?"
Weeds
"I have no idea."
Weeds
"Erm..."
Weeds
"- Listen, we broke up. - I think we established that."
Weeds
"When he brought the citrus over, did he say anything?"
Weeds
"Where he was going? What he might be up to? Work stuff?"
Weeds
"No."
Weeds
"He didn't talk about work much."
Weeds
"I didn't even know what he did till I tried on his jacket once by mistake."
Weeds
"I was cold and I had to pee."
Weeds
"Erm, about the break-up, we were just, you know, at different places."
Weeds
"I think we just wanted different things."
Weeds
"I think he was working on some undercover investigation on his own,"
Weeds
"which is stupid, but even when he goes indie,"
Weeds
"he calls to let me know everything's fine."
Weeds
"He knows I worry."
Weeds
"I hope nothing's wrong."
Weeds
"Well, if you hear from Peter, I'd like you to give me a call."
Weeds
"He really liked you."
Weeds
"Thanks for your time, Mrs. Botwin."
Weeds
"Where is Peter?"
Weeds
"We broke up."
Weeds
"Is that gonna be a problem?"
Weeds
"- No. - What makes you so sure?"
Weeds
"Mommy just knows."
Weeds
"Behold, the incorporated city of Majestic."
Weeds
"A city experiencing a rate of growth few people could have anticipated."
Weeds
"Now, we've been a noisy neighbour, and for that I want to apologise."
Weeds
"That sound you heard coming from the east, the west, the north."
Weeds
"Houses popping up like so many California wildflowers."
Weeds
"Well, that is the sound of an economic miracle."
Weeds
"A month ago, our own City Council"
Weeds
"had a session trying to come up with a new town logo,"
Weeds
"something we could put on our signs, our brochures."
Weeds
"Italy is shaped like a boot. Sicily, the ball that's about to be kicked."
Weeds
"Majestic is shaped like a, well, some people say a horseshoe,"
Weeds
"others, a smile."
Weeds
"But for some of us who are aware of a particular infrastructure problem"
Weeds
"facing Majestic, well, we saw a different image."
Weeds
"In the midst of all our back-slapping, we forgot a fundamental principle of smart growth."
Weeds
"If you're gonna poop, make sure you can flush."
Weeds
"What we need is a bowl."
Weeds
"Agrestic is that bowl."
Weeds
"Now, in exchange for the right to redirect"
Weeds
"a small portion of our sewage through your town,"
Weeds
"we'll retrofit your existing sewage system"
Weeds
"with the most advanced technology available at no cost to you."
Weeds
"We'll also grant you unrestricted access to all our recreational facilities,"
Weeds
"including our non-denominational modern house of worship,"
Weeds
"the Absolute Truth Ministry of Majestic."
Weeds
"Now, I know these are tough times for Agrestic."
Weeds
"Your tax base is shrinking while the cost of maintaining basic services is rising."
Weeds
"It doesn't have to be that way."
Weeds
"We're neighbours."
Weeds
"And this is a hand extended over the fence."
Weeds
"- Thank you, Mr. Groff. - Sullivan. Please."
Weeds
"Sullivan."
Weeds
"Dumb name."
Weeds
"- Education? - Two and a half semesters at Berkeley."
Weeds
"Graduated Berkeley with honours."
Weeds
"No lying. They can check these things."
Weeds
"This is Agrestic. No one's gonna check."
Weeds
"You're gonna look lame and stay unemployed if you don't lie cos everybody else does."
Weeds
"Shane, remember that guy who came to the door last night?"
Weeds
"- Peter's friend? - Yeah."
Weeds
"You haven't seen him lurking around or anything, have you?"
Weeds
"- Seen his Impala parked around? - Lurking?"
Weeds
"- Lurking. - No, I haven't. Why would he be lurking?"
Weeds
"- Does he know you're a drug dealer? - No. I don't think so."
Weeds
"I just... I hear he's a lurker."
Weeds
"- Mom, can you type? - With two fingers."
Weeds
"Proficient typing skills."
Weeds
"Now, what kind of job do you want?"
Weeds
"Anything, so long as there's no folding, lifting or scooping involved."
Weeds
"Then, I'll give you a graduate degree in English,"
Weeds
"and we'll take it from there."
Weeds
"Let's not overdo it."
Weeds
"I'm just proud of you."
Weeds
"What for?"
Weeds
"Getting a real job."
Weeds
"Well, thank you, Shane."
Weeds
"Go, go, go, go, go, go, go. Come on!"
Weeds
"Get your asses over here right now!"
Weeds
"Go. Move it out. Go buy wings, Rodriguez."
Weeds
"Get your cock-violated asshole up that rope, Botwin."
Weeds
"So help me, if you don't, I will rip out your goddamn large intestine"
Weeds
"and string you up by your tiny little pecker with it."
Weeds
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