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Clips from Human Resources (2022) - Rutgers is for Lovers (S01E01)

"I should probably get back to my girl Nadja."
Human Resources (2022)
"She's on prom court and we need an outfit."
Human Resources (2022)
"Ooh! May I recommend red?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Anthropologists say it signifies a healthy vulva."
Human Resources (2022)
"Jesus, Pete!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Thanks for the weird and unsolicited advice."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Oh. -[laughs] See you around."
Human Resources (2022)
"Um… You're welcome."
Human Resources (2022)
"And I'm sorry I said "vulva"! And I'm sorry I'm yelling it right now!"
Human Resources (2022)
"[chuckles, groans]"
Human Resources (2022)
"Man, my computer is being… [grunts]"
Human Resources (2022)
"…so spinny today. [grunts]"
Human Resources (2022)
"Don't hit it. Can I please take a look?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Okay. But you're gonna have to… [spooky voice] …enter at your own risk."
Human Resources (2022)
"Okay, you clearly use your keyboard as a plate for many a croissant, and--"
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, my God. You have 38,000 unread emails?"
Human Resources (2022)
"It's my system. I leave emails unread so that I remember to deal with them."
Human Resources (2022)
"Mm-hm. And have you ever dealt with anything?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Uh… How about three unwanted pregnancies, bitch?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Okay, I'd rather you didn't call me bitch."
Human Resources (2022)
"Sorry, yeah, you've mentioned that."
Human Resources (2022)
"Ooh! Emmy, have you ever heard of Inbox Zero?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, yeah! That's the name of the abortion clinic I go to."
Human Resources (2022)
"No, Inbox Zero is an organizational philosophy."
Human Resources (2022)
"Nay, a lifestyle."
Human Resources (2022)
"And the best part is that it's rigorous and requires constant maintenance."
Human Resources (2022)
"Uh, okay, puke. Sounds like something a logic rock would love."
Human Resources (2022)
"I do. And I even have a little mantra, "A clean box is a happy box.""
Human Resources (2022)
"I know, I know, I'm sure they say the same thing at your clinic."
Human Resources (2022)
"Pete, please don't talk about my abortions at work."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Oh my God. I'm so sorry. -[giggles] I'm just fucking with you."
Human Resources (2022)
"Actually, I wouldn't mind talking about them."
Human Resources (2022)
"I recently got ghosted by my therapist."
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, um… Okay."
Human Resources (2022)
"[pleasant music plays]"
Human Resources (2022)
"Ooh! That's cute. It'll go great with Danielle's horny little dress. Ow!"
Human Resources (2022)
"And we better win goddamn Prom Queen!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Fuck Julia Rubenstein!"
Human Resources (2022)
"You know she's only in the running because her dad died."
Human Resources (2022)
"Thank you, Petra."
Human Resources (2022)
"I floated that in a group text and everyone got mad at me."
Human Resources (2022)
"[phone chimes]"
Human Resources (2022)
"[gasps] "Office of Admissions at Berkeley.""
Human Resources (2022)
"-Oh my God, this is about the wait list. -What do you care?"
Human Resources (2022)
"You're already going to Rutgers with the love of your life."
Human Resources (2022)
"Hey, ho! Wap! Wap! Wap!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Shut your face! Berkeley's our dream school."
Human Resources (2022)
"-I feel sick. -Open it or I'll kill you!"
Human Resources (2022)
""We are pleased to offer you admission…" Oh, my God!"
Human Resources (2022)
"-You did it! -I got in!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Eat shit, everyone who ever fucking doubted us!"
Human Resources (2022)
"-I'm amazing! -Can you shut the fuck up?"
Human Resources (2022)
"I'm trying to see how many eggs I can fit in my mouth,"
Human Resources (2022)
"and you're ruining my focus."
Human Resources (2022)
"-I got into Berkeley, bitch. -Holy shit! That's amazing!"
Human Resources (2022)
"-I am a fucking immortal genius! -You will never die!"
Human Resources (2022)
"-Wait, what about Danielle? -Who?"
Human Resources (2022)
"-Excuse me? -Oh, fuck."
Human Resources (2022)
"-The icon who fingered you to completion? -Danielle…"
Human Resources (2022)
"Okay. Well, you seem upset."
Human Resources (2022)
"My work here is done. Time to get back to my eggs. Good talk."
Human Resources (2022)
"[gulps] Bye."
Human Resources (2022)
"[sighs] It's gonna be so romantic"
Human Resources (2022)
"when you choose Danielle over everything else in the world."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Rutgers! -Nice try."
Human Resources (2022)
"Dream. School. Resumé. Gold."
Human Resources (2022)
"Don't be stupid. Go to Berkeley."
Human Resources (2022)
"What the fuck? I thought we were friends now?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Relax, we are. As long as I get what I want, which is Berkeley."
Human Resources (2022)
"No. Rutgers!"
Human Resources (2022)
"God! This whole dream come true thing sucks my fuckin' asshole."
Human Resources (2022)
"-[dramatic music plays] -[Pete] Emmy, behold…"
Human Resources (2022)
"I've created a complex yet intuitive system"
Human Resources (2022)
"to organize your irresponsible amount of unread emails."
Human Resources (2022)
"I've simply transported your emails into actionable and archival folders."
Human Resources (2022)
"And now, every time you get a new email, you just remember the Four D's and One R."
Human Resources (2022)
"Delegate…"
Human Resources (2022)
"Defer…"
Human Resources (2022)
"Respond…"
Human Resources (2022)
"Do…"
Human Resources (2022)
"-Or Delete. -[music crescendos]"
Human Resources (2022)
"Hm. Pretty magical, huh?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh no. Pete, bud,"
Human Resources (2022)
"do you think wizards are cool?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Yeah, well, if we're not cool,"
Human Resources (2022)
"then why is Gandalf drowning in hobbit twat?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Is he? Wow. Good for him."
Human Resources (2022)
"Okay, there were some emails I had trouble categorizing."
Human Resources (2022)
"Where should this one go? Subject line, "The Chugger.""
Human Resources (2022)
"[spits] Oh! Um…"
Human Resources (2022)
"You can just delete that one."
Human Resources (2022)
"It's, uh, not about work, it's stupid."
Human Resources (2022)
"-So just go ahead and delete it, yeah. -[frantic beeping]"
Human Resources (2022)
"You and Rochelle have been going back and forth on this for years."
Human Resources (2022)
"-It's 700 emails long. -Yeah, what the heck? Stupid."
Human Resources (2022)
"Here, I'll just delete it myself. [laughs]"
Human Resources (2022)
""That feeling when The Chugger gets to the water cooler first." Hm."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Oh, it's just a stupid meme. -[Pete laughs] No, no, I get it."
Human Resources (2022)
"-This guy drinks a lot of water. -[laughs] Yes, he does."
Human Resources (2022)
""The Chugger looks thirsty this morning, hide your Dasanis." [laughs]"
Human Resources (2022)
"[laughs] Yeah."
Human Resources (2022)
"Who is this loser schmuck you're calling "The Chugger," anyway?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Uh… Gosh. It's, um…"
Human Resources (2022)
"-It's-- Of course it's Joe. -[grunts]"
Human Resources (2022)
"-Yeah, it's Joe. Joe is The Chugger. -Huh."
Human Resources (2022)
"-You know what? -What?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Yeah, I have seen Joe drink. Classic Chugger."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Totally, yes. Very true. -[chuckles]"
Human Resources (2022)
"Poor guy. He has no idea, does he?"
Human Resources (2022)
"No, no, and we should, of course, never speak of it to him"
Human Resources (2022)
"or really anyone else even, I would even say."
Human Resources (2022)
"[high voice] Methinks that Mr. Chugger's none the wiser, young Padawan."
Human Resources (2022)
"-[laughs] Star Wars, cool reference. -[chuckles] It's Yoda."
Human Resources (2022)
"[Amir] So I told him, I said, "Doctor,"
Human Resources (2022)
"ears, nose, and throat, it's too many things.""
Human Resources (2022)
""You should pick one and corner the market.""
Human Resources (2022)
"-[laughs] -That's great, Dad."
Human Resources (2022)
"Why aren't you telling your dad the good news?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Because there is no good news. She's still going to Rutgers."
Human Resources (2022)
"What'd you get into today, Natalie?"
Human Resources (2022)
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