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Clips from Abbott Elementary - Desking (S01E01)

"So this Zach, he lives with you?"
Abbott Elementary
"Yeah. He just moved in last month."
Abbott Elementary
"And that's going well?"
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"Yep. He's so great."
Abbott Elementary
"So he knew you and was like...more?"
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"Well, I think he sounds like a really neat guy, right?"
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"- Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. - Sure. Yeah."
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"- Heyyy. There's my guy. - Black?!"
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"It's actually pronounced "Zach." You must be Ava."
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"You were all thinking it."
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"I see you. Don't look at me like that."
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"We always look at you like this."
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"It's very nice to meet you, Zach."
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"(chuckles) Well, if it isn't my pizza crust queen."
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"(both laugh)"
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"We went out to eat last week and I ate all his pizza crust."
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"I don't like to waste food."
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"Wait, is this our desker?"
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"Yes."
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"Huh."
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"Huh? What -- What do you mean by "huh"?"
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"It looked smaller in the pic."
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"This is way too big to be a second grader."
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"- They laughing in our faces. - Mm-hmm."
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"If this was a small adult sneaker,"
Abbott Elementary
"it increases the make and model options significantly."
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"He's so smart. (chuckles)"
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"We came in 3rd at trivia night last week over at Oscar's."
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"You know, down by Rittenhouse."
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"We were eliminated on a technicality,"
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"but Sri Lanka, if you didn't know --"
Abbott Elementary
"Honey, where is this story going?"
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"Are we focusing on the task at hand?"
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"Mnh. No, we're not. I'm so sorry. Please continue."
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"Did he just stop Jacob from being...himself?"
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"Can we put him in glass and break in case of emergency?"
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"All right, let's get to work."
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"They say the first 48 hours are the most important."
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"Wait, wait, wait. Hold on."
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"Are those the black and grey asymmetric midsoles?"
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"I decided to be adventurous and wear sneakers today."
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"Sick."
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"(snaps fingers)"
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"- All right. - Okay. Thank you."
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"- I like him. - Mm."
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"Still don't know how he lives with Jacob."
Abbott Elementary
"You think his neck gets tired from all the nodding?"
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"Mm-hmm."
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"(school bell rings)"
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"Just got an e-mail from Zach. Subject: "You're welcome.""
Abbott Elementary
"- Ooh. - Oh."
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"Oh, we about to bust this case wide open."
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"Uh...okay."
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"He says that while he initially leaned Jordan 5s,"
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"the faint line at the mid-arch"
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"indicates a swoosh and not the Jumpman logo --"
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"Okay. Scroll. Scroll."
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"- Is there a picture? - Yeah."
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"- Oh. - Ooh."
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"Okay, well, this is great."
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"All we have to do is look at the kids' feet,"
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"which is something I would say we normally wouldn't do, but..."
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"No. We don't."
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"'Cause I've only seen those on two kids --"
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"Brianna and Stefon."
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"Yeah, but let's not rush out and make accusations."
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"AVA: I'm coming for you!"
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"Okay, let's split 'em up and make 'em sing."
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"Two of you take Stefon, the other two take Brianna."
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"Right. Good cop, bad cop."
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"You know, it's interesting that they say "good cop, bad cop,""
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"because policing in this country is so broken,"
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"it's really just "bad cop, bad cop.""
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"- Janine, you're with him. - Got it."
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"Look, Stefon, I get it."
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"I was a kid once."
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"But you and I both know this is gonna end,"
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"and when it does, you don't wanna be the one"
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"left holding the bag."
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"'Cause that's exactly what's gonna happen"
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"when your friend over there starts talking."
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"I bet she ratting you out right now"
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"like a little Fredo Corleone."
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"So I would talk if I were you."
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"'Cause you don't want me sending you over to"
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"Ms. Teagues and Mr. Hill."
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"I don't think you'd like what's going on in that room."
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"Look, sometimes, sometimes, the right thing is fun."
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"(chuckles)"
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"So why don't you tell us who started this"
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"and who's doing it?"
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"You know, doesn't that sound fun?"
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"Okay, kid."
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"First one to talk, first one to walk."
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"How'd those shoes get on that desk?"
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"- Name names! - Yeah, name names."
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"TikTok, Twitch, Discord?"
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"Just tell me where they setting them trends"
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"- and you can leave. - Yeah."
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"No. We got to get a confession."
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"Squeal, and you can Dipset like Cam'ron."
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"You know what? One second."
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"(quietly) Okay. She's not talking."
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"Okay. Uh, let me try something, okay?"
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"Um... (chuckles)"
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"You look a little thirsty."
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"Oh, look what I found."
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"A nice, cold, refreshing juice."
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"I bet you'd like some juice."
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"- I'm fine. - Oh, okay."
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"'Cause me? I'm thirsty."
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"(quietly) I can't get it in."
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"You -- You have to twist it."
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"Yeah. No. I can -- I can do it myself."
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"Ah."
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"Oh."
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"I'm sorry, you tired?"
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"Want some coffee?"
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"'Cause I can do this all day, kid."
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"I got all the time in the world."
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