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Clips from Deadpool 2

"What do you do?"
Deadpool 2
"Do you go to a bathroom"
Deadpool 2
"and tear off a piece of dry tissue..."
Deadpool 2
"and rub it around on your beard a little bit"
Deadpool 2
"and then go on, get on with your day?"
Deadpool 2
"Go to church, maybe dinner and a movie,"
Deadpool 2
"like nothing happened?"
Deadpool 2
"Where is this coming from, man?"
Deadpool 2
"But something did happen."
Deadpool 2
"Your face smells like shit. Right?"
Deadpool 2
"So what you would do,"
Deadpool 2
"is you would get some soap, you'd get some hot water..."
Deadpool 2
"and you would scrub the fucking shit"
Deadpool 2
"out of your beard for 10 straight minutes."
Deadpool 2
"You could not scrub it enough."
Deadpool 2
"Are you trying to make me feel disgusting?"
Deadpool 2
"I'm starting to feel..."
Deadpool 2
"Toilet paper is a pretty fine appetizer."
Deadpool 2
"But, then..."
Deadpool 2
"Huggies Natural Care wet wipes."
Deadpool 2
"That's your main course."
Deadpool 2
"They're soft, they're moist. They're for babies."
Deadpool 2
"Finally, one more pass with toilet paper,"
Deadpool 2
"maybe clear out that excess moisture."
Deadpool 2
"Maybe treat yourself to a blow and go,"
Deadpool 2
"if you can get you a hair dryer."
Deadpool 2
"Just about 30 seconds would do you good."
Deadpool 2
"The fuck?"
Deadpool 2
"Year."
Deadpool 2
"What?"
Deadpool 2
"What year is it?"
Deadpool 2
"What kind of dumbass question is that to ask?"
Deadpool 2
"We have 8 weeks of boot camp ahead of us, men."
Deadpool 2
"That'll get us toned and prepared"
Deadpool 2
"for all manner of combat."
Deadpool 2
"Not working out at all."
Deadpool 2
"Masking tape."
Deadpool 2
"It is no friend to chilled aluminum."
Deadpool 2
"Velcro. Color-coded, efficient,"
Deadpool 2
"environmentally friendly."
Deadpool 2
"Who is he talking to?"
Deadpool 2
"And why is he dressed like a registered sex offender?"
Deadpool 2
"Can we focus for a moment, ladies?"
Deadpool 2
"Please, we need to talk about next month's meal plan."
Deadpool 2
"Obviously, everyone hated the ceviche."
Deadpool 2
"I read the suggestion box."
Deadpool 2
"I'm gonna stop you right there."
Deadpool 2
"I see through this weak act."
Deadpool 2
"You may have fooled Colossus with this nice guy shit..."
Deadpool 2
"but not me."
Deadpool 2
"Don't be mean."
Deadpool 2
"Back off, NTW."
Deadpool 2
"No, no, no. Let her go."
Deadpool 2
"Let her go, it's okay."
Deadpool 2
"She has a right to be skeptical."
Deadpool 2
"Look at me. I'm an easy target."
Deadpool 2
"You know, historically,"
Deadpool 2
"mischief has been my mistress..."
Deadpool 2
"so I understand, you know. But I like to think..."
Deadpool 2
"that you guys have really rubbed off on me."
Deadpool 2
"I like to think that I've rubbed off around you, too."
Deadpool 2
"A lot."
Deadpool 2
"And for the first time in a long while..."
Deadpool 2
"I like me."
Deadpool 2
"I accept your apology. I never apologized."
Deadpool 2
"I was talking to your heart."
Deadpool 2
"See? You're not lost cause you thought."
Deadpool 2
"I'm proud. You're everything I knew you can be."
Deadpool 2
"Thank you, Colossus."
Deadpool 2
"Just trying to be the world's best X-Man."
Deadpool 2
"Sorry, X-Person."
Deadpool 2
"Hmm. Something wrong with the soap."
Deadpool 2
"It's fine."
Deadpool 2
"I just filled it. Give it a few more pumps there."
Deadpool 2
"Now, if you'll excuse me..."
Deadpool 2
"it's dust bunny season..."
Deadpool 2
"and I'm hunting wabbits."
Deadpool 2
"Bye, Wade!"
Deadpool 2
"Fuck. Fuck you."
Deadpool 2
"No one is born perfect."
Deadpool 2
"But you can be."
Deadpool 2
"I know you're doing what comes naturally."
Deadpool 2
"You can't help yourself."
Deadpool 2
"But you can."
Deadpool 2
"It takes work, discipline..."
Deadpool 2
"and treatment."
Deadpool 2
"Your abilities..."
Deadpool 2
"I know how seductive they are."
Deadpool 2
"How powerful they make you feel."
Deadpool 2
"But you must learn never to use them..."
Deadpool 2
"so they will never use you."
Deadpool 2
"Please don't cry."
Deadpool 2
"I'm going to help."
Deadpool 2
"I'm gonna make you feel what you should feel."
Deadpool 2
"How you need to feel..."
Deadpool 2
"every time you're tempted to act upon your urges."
Deadpool 2
"Suck my mutant dick, you four-eyed fuck."
Deadpool 2
"Wade."
Deadpool 2
"Wade!"
Deadpool 2
"Come in! Hey, I was just doing"
Deadpool 2
"a little bit of light reading here..."
Deadpool 2
"We have mission."
Deadpool 2
"Well, you guys be safe out there."
Deadpool 2
"I'll be praying for you."
Deadpool 2
"No, I want you to join."
Deadpool 2
"I'm sorry, what?"
Deadpool 2
"You heard me."
Deadpool 2
"Trust me, that's a terrible idea."
Deadpool 2
"I'm really not ready."
Deadpool 2
"You are ready. I'm not."
Deadpool 2
"Be at the X-Jet in five."
Deadpool 2
"I can do thirty."
Deadpool 2
"Now. I can do now."
Deadpool 2
"Final offer."
Deadpool 2
"Irene Merryweather, WHIT News."
Deadpool 2
"Live here at a breaking news situation"
Deadpool 2
"at the Essex House for Mutant Rehabilitation."
Deadpool 2
"A mutant boy is appearing to have"
Deadpool 2
"some sort of an incident..."
Deadpool 2
"- with police here behind me. - Get away from me!"
Deadpool 2
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