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Clips from NewsRadio - In Through the Out Door (S02E02)

"Hey, gang."
NewsRadio
"How'd you guys do this weekend?"
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"Well, I lost on New York,"
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"but Jersey, Houston, and Golden State"
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"came through for me big-time,"
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"so final tally-- up 200 bucks."
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"Not too bad."
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"How did you pick Jersey over Atlanta?"
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"I got killed on that one."
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"Hey, guys, what are you talking about?"
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"So, you know, you're just giving your money away"
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"playing Atlanta on the road."
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"Well, they would have covered it"
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"if Anderson hadn't missed four free throws"
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"in the last two minutes."
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"Sports, huh? Oh, man, I love sports."
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"Hey, did you guys hear"
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"they got a whole cable channel"
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"just for sports now?"
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"Anytime you got a home team on two days' rest"
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"getting 10 points, you got to bet on them."
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"But they lost four in a row at home."
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"10 points? That sounds like a lot of points."
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"That means they're due to win one."
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"Well, you know, I got a system."
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"Always bet against any team Ted Turner owns."
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"That's what he does."
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"I'm a Knickerbockers fan, I guess."
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"Since I live in New York, you know."
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"I don't know about Phoenix."
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"They never do that well in the regular season."
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"Go Knickers, right?"
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"What's the spread?"
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"It's 4."
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"No, no. 4 1/2."
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"5...I heard..."
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"I went to Phoenix once, though."
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"It was pretty fun."
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"Didn't do any sports, but, uh..."
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"You know, what exactly is a spread, anyways?"
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"What do you think of Detroit at Atlanta?"
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"When's that, Thursday?"
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"Anyways, I'll catch you guys on the flip-flop, as they say."
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"Anyway..."
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"[♪]"
NewsRadio
"Hey, Joe, who do you like in the fifth today?"
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"You don't gamble."
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"Oh, I dabble in the horsies from time to time."
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"You mean the ponies?"
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"Yeah."
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"Anyway, um..."
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"looking at the old racing form here,"
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"and I just can't figure out where the smart money's going."
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"The smart money's not going to anywhere near somebody"
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"using a racing form from 1993."
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"Joe..."
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"Joe, teach me how to gamble."
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"Why do you want to learn how to gamble?"
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"Because you guys come in here every Monday,"
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"and that's all you talk about is gambling, gambling, gambling,"
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"and I never have anything to say."
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"Yeah, but if I teach you how to gamble,"
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"Yeah, exactly."
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"You're not listening."
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"Joe, seriously. I'm begging you."
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"No. No way, man. Get out of here."
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"Come on."
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"Look, I know I seem a little weird sometimes,"
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"but you would too if you always felt excluded."
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"You know? I just..."
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"I just want to be one of the guys, you know?"
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"Just for once."
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"It really would mean a lot to me."
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"All right, fine. You want to make a bet?"
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"Yeah."
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"Okay, I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 5."
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"You try to guess it."
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"Yeah, but it's got to be for cash."
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"10 bucks,"
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"and I'll give you 100-to-1 odds."
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"Oh, that means if you win, you get 10 bucks,"
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"but if I win..."
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"You get 1,000."
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"Wow. I'd be stupid not to..."
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"Right. You ready?"
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"Ready? Go."
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"Uh, four."
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"No, three. Good try."
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"Hey, what's the story, morning glory?"
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"Hey, Mr. James."
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"Guess what."
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"I have whittled my list of potential wives"
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"down to..."
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"23 women."
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"So you've eliminated 13 women already."
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"Yeah, well, you know,"
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"flu season's been brutal on some of the older ones."
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"I got my sights set on that chanteuse, Melissa Etheridge."
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"I mean, man, that woman has everything."
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"I believe she's gay, sir."
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"Yeah, she is a house of fire."
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"Yeah, well, I believe she's gay."
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"A lesbian."
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"A gay, lesbian-type woman, sir."
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"Oh, really?"
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"Uh-huh."
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"Well, I guess I'm down to 22."
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"How gay is she?"
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"Oh, she's right up there with K.D. Lang, sir."
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"Aw, shoot."
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"Yeah."
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"Oh, Dave, Dave, Bill's going to do a speech"
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"at the broadcasting society tonight."
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"I told him I'd be there,"
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"but now it looks like I can't make it."
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"Could you sub for me?"
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"Uh, sure. Sure."
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"Good. I got to get out of here. God bless."
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"So, you're going to a lesbian banquet, huh, Dave?"
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"If I put a plastic bag in your jacket,"
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