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Clips from Lucifer - A Priest Walks Into a Bar (S01E01)

"It's a voice modulator. Hey, can you not do that?"
Lucifer
"(distorted): Detective, I am your father."
Lucifer
"It's not a toy, Lucifer."
Lucifer
"It could be evidence."
Lucifer
"Well, I'm impressed."
Lucifer
"Looks like the priest"
Lucifer
"handled it himself after all."
Lucifer
"- We don't know the priest did this. - Well, maybe you don't."
Lucifer
"MAN: Detective Decker?"
Lucifer
"Hold on."
Lucifer
"Oh, can you take that?"
Lucifer
"Yeah. Thank you."
Lucifer
"Hey, you're the head counselor, right?"
Lucifer
"Uh, yeah."
Lucifer
"Um, Eric Doyle."
Lucifer
"Any idea who might've done this?"
Lucifer
"No."
Lucifer
"I mean, everyone liked Lenny."
Lucifer
"He was a good boss."
Lucifer
"So, he had no enemies whatsoever, no?"
Lucifer
"Especially any who wear clerical collars?"
Lucifer
"- So you know about the priest. - Oh, yes."
Lucifer
"Yeah, that guy's always coming around here"
Lucifer
"and getting into arguments with Lenny."
Lucifer
"Hmm."
Lucifer
"But he's a priest."
Lucifer
"Right."
Lucifer
"Mr. Doyle, where were you"
Lucifer
"between 11:30 and 12:00 this morning?"
Lucifer
"Uh... here."
Lucifer
"In counseling sessions with, uh, Nikki and Connor."
Lucifer
"Connor?"
Lucifer
"Well, that's the altar boy"
Lucifer
"from the priest's photo."
Lucifer
"So, is it, is it true"
Lucifer
"Mr. Arietta's dead?"
Lucifer
"Well, duh, dumb-ass."
Lucifer
"It is."
Lucifer
"Yeah."
Lucifer
"Did you know him well?"
Lucifer
"A little, I guess."
Lucifer
"He, he, I mean, he ran the place."
Lucifer
"Do you know if Mr. Arietta was involved in any drug activity?"
Lucifer
"(laughing): Drugs?"
Lucifer
"I mean, I wish he was."
Lucifer
"That would've made him more interesting."
Lucifer
"(chuckles) Okay."
Lucifer
"Enough about the dead guy."
Lucifer
"Tell me everything you know about Padre Pederast."
Lucifer
"Who?"
Lucifer
"Father Frank."
Lucifer
"Did you see him do this?"
Lucifer
"Do you think he's capable?"
Lucifer
"Father Frank kill Mr. Arietta?"
Lucifer
"Yes."
Lucifer
"No. No way."
Lucifer
"NIKKI: What do you mean "no way"?"
Lucifer
"The guy's a creeper and totally obsessed with you."
Lucifer
"He's just overprotective."
Lucifer
"Ever since my parents died,"
Lucifer
"he feels like he's got to watch out for me or something."
Lucifer
"But he's a good guy."
Lucifer
"He's just a little..."
Lucifer
"just a little annoying."
Lucifer
"- See? - Hmm?"
Lucifer
"- Annoying. - Mm-hmm."
Lucifer
"When was the last time you saw him?"
Lucifer
"Uh, he-here this morning."
Lucifer
"Yeah, preacher seemed pretty pissed."
Lucifer
"Oh."
Lucifer
"Uh, wait, you don't really think"
Lucifer
"that, like, Father Frank did this, right?"
Lucifer
"- 100%. - Thank you."
Lucifer
"You've been very helpful."
Lucifer
"Right."
Lucifer
"See? Told you."
Lucifer
"No, I hate to admit it, but you might be on to something."
Lucifer
"Sorry, what was that?"
Lucifer
"You might be on to something."
Lucifer
"That's him."
Lucifer
"Frank Lawrence."
Lucifer
"The most evil of people have the most normal names,"
Lucifer
"I've experienced."
Lucifer
"Beware anyone named Keith."
Lucifer
"Well, his criminal record's pretty extensive."
Lucifer
"Assault and battery, disorderly conduct,"
Lucifer
"- drug charges. - See?"
Lucifer
"Not very priest-like."
Lucifer
"But nothing in the past ten years."
Lucifer
"Ah, restraining order"
Lucifer
"filed by Lenny Arietta last week."
Lucifer
"LUCIFER: Ah, well, it's funny how Padre Punchy"
Lucifer
"failed to mention a restraining order."
Lucifer
"Please tell me now we have enough"
Lucifer
"to bring this priest down."
Lucifer
"We have enough to bring him in."
Lucifer
"You ready to go to church?"
Lucifer
"Bringing down a priest is the only reason I ever would."
Lucifer
"In. Bring him in."
Lucifer
"Yes, bring him in so we can bring him down."
Lucifer
"(chuckles)"
Lucifer
"Hey, um, you go ahead."
Lucifer
"I'll... I'll meet you downstairs."
Lucifer
"(elevator bell dings) Just something I got to do first."
Lucifer
"(door closes) Hey, so I'm in the middle of something,"
Lucifer
"but I haven't seen you all week."
Lucifer
"Are we gonna talk about what happened?"
Lucifer
"What?"
Lucifer
"Our kiss, Dan."
Lucifer
"It's kind of a big deal."
Lucifer
"DAN: Right, I'm sorry, Chloe."
Lucifer
"I've had a lot on my mind."
Lucifer
"Yeah. You okay?"
Lucifer
"Yeah, I'm fine."
Lucifer
"But we should talk."
Lucifer
"About everything. Just not here."
Lucifer
"Okay, do you want to do dinner at my place, get takeout?"
Lucifer
"Yeah. Zhang Chow's?"
Lucifer
"(chuckles) Zhang Chow... I was just gonna say that."
Lucifer
"(chuckles) Yeah, all right."
Lucifer
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