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Clips from Silicon Valley - Third Party Insourcing (S01E01)

"It looks uncomfortable."
Silicon Valley
"Hey, guys."
Silicon Valley
"Hey, Kevin, um,"
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"so how did you bypass Bank of America's network security?"
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"I want details."
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"My lawyers told me I'm not allowed to discuss it."
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"Totally get it. That's baller."
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"- Hey, babe? - Hmm."
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"You're up."
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"- All right, I'm gonna go have a shower. - Mm-hm."
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"- Uh, what was that? - What?"
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"Tara just whispered something to you and then she looked at me in a weird way."
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"No, she didn't."
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"Yeah, she did."
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"What's up?"
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"Do you know what compersion is?"
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"It's when someone takes pleasure in seeing their loved one gratified"
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"by another person."
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"Sexually. It's the opposite of jealousy."
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"It sounds like it's the opposite of normal. Why are you telling me about this thing?"
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"As shocking as this is..."
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"Tara is attracted to you."
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"Come again?"
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"Yeah, freaked me out too, at first."
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"I don't like the at first part at all."
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"What are you saying?"
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"Since I abide by the maxim,"
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"Do what thou wilt, that is the whole of the law..."
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"if you want to fuck my girlfriend, I'm OK with it."
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"Jesus Christ, man, I could barely stand next to you when you're in your towel."
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"I don't want to have a threesome with you."
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"I'm not talking about a threesome."
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"Listen, I don't even have to be in the room,"
Silicon Valley
"unless that's better for you."
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"OK, no, I don't..."
Silicon Valley
"Right, so we're all settled then."
Silicon Valley
"- Yep. - Do you need parking validation?"
Silicon Valley
"No, I used Lyft."
Silicon Valley
"So I'll Lyft it back."
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"Why don't I have Peter's car take you home."
Silicon Valley
"He's not using it, we're shipping off to Arallon tomorrow."
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"- Arallon? - Yeah, the island Peter's building."
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"What's the... the red line?"
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"That's the International Date Line."
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"The island's built right on it"
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"so the western half can celebrate the first new years on Earth,"
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"then the next day, they walk over to the eastern half"
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"and celebrate the last new years on Earth."
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"But if you can walk, why does he need the car on the island?"
Silicon Valley
"Peter's not really big on walking."
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"So I'll just have the guys pull it up front for you."
Silicon Valley
"Great."
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"Driverless car."
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"Select destination."
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"Hi. Um... I'm going to 5230"
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"Newell Road, Palo Alto..."
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"Route guidance calibrated."
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"four point six miles. Buckle up, please."
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"OK."
Silicon Valley
"Enjoy your ride."
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"You?"
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"Tara wants to have sex with you? You sure?"
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"Yeah, Gilfoyle just told me, to my face."
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"He told you that Tara wants to copulate with someone else in the house"
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"other than him and that someone is you, Dinesh?"
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"Yeah, that's..."
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"You know, you seem confused by this but for a different reason than I am."
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"Don't you think it's weird that Tara wants some strange"
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"and she chooses you over me,"
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"the logical person in the house?"
Silicon Valley
"OK, I see where we are ending up on this. Thank you for your time."
Silicon Valley
"Wait, are you sure that she didn't ask Gilfoyle"
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"for a danish and maybe you misheard her?"
Silicon Valley
"You're probably right, she just wanted to fuck a danish."
Silicon Valley
"Wait, you just built all the indexes on the fly?"
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"Yeah, of course."
Silicon Valley
"OK, well... Well, then what's that?"
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"The key value store."
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"Tuples."
Silicon Valley
"Speak English."
Silicon Valley
"You're kind of doing that lip thing again there, buddy."
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"No, I'm not."
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"Stop looking at my lips."
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"Destination override. New destination."
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"One Gregory Drive. Arallon."
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"4,126 miles."
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"Enjoy your ride."
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"Um, what's happening?"
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"I'm sorry, what... Mr. Car?"
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"Hey. Tara and I are going to a Satanic baptism. You wanna come?"
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"Stu Burns decided to walk the left-hand path with us."
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"The database administrator for Yahoo is becoming a Satanist?"
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"We're everywhere."
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"Hey, Erlich, are you coming? Dinesh is."
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"He is?"
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"This is Monica."
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"Hi Monica, it's Jared. Uh, quick question..."
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"Jared, I can't talk right now."
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"One of our assistants has been confusing the eastern,"
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"western time zones of Arallon on work orders."
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"Now a bunch of important things are happening a day early."
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"Peter is going to be furious when he finds out."
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"He's going to make that noise."
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"Oh, shit, that's him on the other line. I gotta go."
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"- Oh wait Monica. It just... - Hi, Peter."
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"Hello, Monica?"
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"Um, car? Mr. Car?"
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"Uh, excuse me."
Silicon Valley
"Arallon is an island, so how are we...?"
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"Oh, no, no! No."
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"Stop. Let me out."
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"Mmm. Um... Uh, that's not good."
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"Oh, no! No!"
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"Excuse me please!"
Silicon Valley
"Please honk. Please honk."
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"No, no, no, no. No, no, no."
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"No, no. Please. Please."
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"Oh, no, that's not good."
Silicon Valley
"OK, Donald, stay calm."
Silicon Valley
"103 hours to destination. Entering sleep mode."
Silicon Valley
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