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Clips from Monty Python's Flying Circus - How to Recognise Different Types of Trees from Quite a Long Way Away (S01E01)

Of this extraordinary tangled web of intrigue

"Of this extraordinary tangled web of intrigue"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Will shortly, my lord

"Will shortly, my lord"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Reveal a plot so fiendish, so infernal, so heinous.

"Reveal a plot so fiendish, so infernal, so heinous."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Mr. bartlett, your client has already pleaded guilty

"Mr. bartlett, your client has already pleaded guilty"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

To the parking offense.

"To the parking offense."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Parking offense, schmarking offense, my lord.

"Parking offense, schmarking offense, my lord."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

We must leave no stone unturned.

"We must leave no stone unturned."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Call cardinal richelieu.

"Call cardinal richelieu."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Oh, you're just trying to string this case out.

"Oh, you're just trying to string this case out."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Cardinal richelieu?

"Cardinal richelieu?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

A character witness, my lord.

"A character witness, my lord."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Hello, everyone.

"Hello, everyone."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

It's wonderful to be here, you know, I just love your country.

"It's wonderful to be here, you know, I just love your country."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

London is so beautiful at this time of year.

"London is so beautiful at this time of year."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

You are cardinal armand du plessis de richelieu

"You are cardinal armand du plessis de richelieu"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

First minister of louis xiii?

"First minister of louis xiii?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

oui.

"oui."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Cardinal, would it be fair to say

"Cardinal, would it be fair to say"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

That you not only built up the centralized monarchy in france

"That you not only built up the centralized monarchy in france"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

But also perpetuated the religious schism in europe?

"But also perpetuated the religious schism in europe?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

That's what they say.

"That's what they say."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

And did you persecute the huguenots?

"And did you persecute the huguenots?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

oui.

"oui."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

And did you take even sterner measures

"And did you take even sterner measures"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Against the great catholic nobles

"Against the great catholic nobles"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Who made common cause with foreign foes

"Who made common cause with foreign foes"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

In defense of their feudal independence?

"In defense of their feudal independence?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

I sure did that thing.

"I sure did that thing."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Cardinal, are you acquainted

"Cardinal, are you acquainted"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

With the defendant, harold larch?

"With the defendant, harold larch?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Since I was so high.

"Since I was so high."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Speaking as a cardinal of the roman catholic church

"Speaking as a cardinal of the roman catholic church"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

As first minister of louis xiii

"As first minister of louis xiii"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

And as one of the architects

"And as one of the architects"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Of the modern world already

"Of the modern world already"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Would you say that harold larch was a man of good character?

"Would you say that harold larch was a man of good character?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Listen, harry is a very wonderful human being.

"Listen, harry is a very wonderful human being."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

My lord, in view of the impeccable nature

"My lord, in view of the impeccable nature"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Of this character witness, may I plead for clemency?

"Of this character witness, may I plead for clemency?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

It's only 30 shillings.

"It's only 30 shillings."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Not so fast.

"Not so fast."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Why not?

"Why not?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Uh... uh...

"Uh... uh..."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

None of your smart answers.

"None of your smart answers."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

You think you're so clever.

"You think you're so clever."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Well, I'm dim.

"Well, I'm dim."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Dim? consternation, uproar!

"Dim? consternation, uproar!"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Yes, and I have a few questions I'd like to ask

"Yes, and I have a few questions I'd like to ask"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Cardinal so-called richelieu.

"Cardinal so-called richelieu."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

bonjour, monsieur dim.

"bonjour, monsieur dim."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

So-called cardinal

"So-called cardinal"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

I put it to you that you died

"I put it to you that you died"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

In december 1642.

"In december 1642."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

That is correct.

"That is correct."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Aha! he fell for my little trap.

"Aha! he fell for my little trap."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Curse you, inspector dim

"Curse you, inspector dim"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

You are too clever for us naughty people.

"You are too clever for us naughty people."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

And furthermore, I suggest

"And furthermore, I suggest"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

That you are none other than ron higgins

"That you are none other than ron higgins"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Professional cardinal richelieu impersonator.

"Professional cardinal richelieu impersonator."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

It's a fair cop.

"It's a fair cop."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

My life, you're clever, dim, he'd certainly taken me in.

"My life, you're clever, dim, he'd certainly taken me in."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

It's all in a day's work.

"It's all in a day's work."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Well, with a brilliant mind like yours, dim

"Well, with a brilliant mind like yours, dim"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

You could be something other than a policeman.

"You could be something other than a policeman."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Yes.

"Yes."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

What?

"What?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

If I were not in the c.i.d., something else I'd like to be.

"If I were not in the c.i.d., something else I'd like to be."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

If I were not in the c.i.d., a window cleaner me.

"If I were not in the c.i.d., a window cleaner me."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

With a rub-a-dub-dub and a scrub-a-dub-dub

"With a rub-a-dub-dub and a scrub-a-dub-dub"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

And a rub-a-dub all day long.

"And a rub-a-dub all day long."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

With a rub-a-dub-dub and a scrub-a-dub-dub

"With a rub-a-dub-dub and a scrub-a-dub-dub"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

I'd sing this merry song.

"I'd sing this merry song."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

If I were not in the c.i.d., something else I'd like to be.

"If I were not in the c.i.d., something else I'd like to be."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

If I were not in the c.i.d., a window cleaner me.

"If I were not in the c.i.d., a window cleaner me."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

With a rub-a-dub-dub and a scrub-a-dub-dub

"With a rub-a-dub-dub and a scrub-a-dub-dub"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

And a rub-a-dub all day long.

"And a rub-a-dub all day long."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

With a rub-a-dub-dub and a rub-a-dub-dub

"With a rub-a-dub-dub and a rub-a-dub-dub"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

I'd sing this merry song.

"I'd sing this merry song."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Hey!

"Hey!"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

If... I were not before the bar

"If... I were not before the bar"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Something else I'd like to be

"Something else I'd like to be"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

If I were not a barrister, an engine driver me.

"If I were not a barrister, an engine driver me."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

With a chuf-chuf-chuf and a chuf-chuf-chuf...

"With a chuf-chuf-chuf and a chuf-chuf-chuf..."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Chuf...

"Chuf..."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

The larch.

"The larch."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

the larch.

"the larch."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

the larch

"the larch"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

and now

"and now"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

number one

"number one"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

[slide changes]

"[slide changes]"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

the larch

"the larch"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

and now

"and now"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

This man is no ordinary man.

"This man is no ordinary man."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

This is mr. f.g. superman

"This is mr. f.g. superman"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

To all appearances no different

"To all appearances no different"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

From any other law-abiding citizen.

"From any other law-abiding citizen."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

But mr. f.g. superman has a secret identity.

"But mr. f.g. superman has a secret identity."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

When trouble strikes, at any time, at any place

"When trouble strikes, at any time, at any place"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

He is ready to become... bicycle repairman.

"He is ready to become... bicycle repairman."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Hey!

"Hey!"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

There's a bicycle broken.

"There's a bicycle broken."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Up the road!

"Up the road!"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

hmm... goodness

"hmm... goodness"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

this sounds like a job for bicycle repairman.

"this sounds like a job for bicycle repairman."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

but how to change without revealing my secret identity?

"but how to change without revealing my secret identity?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

If only bicycle repairman were here.

"If only bicycle repairman were here."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Oh, yeah.

"Oh, yeah."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Wait!

"Wait!"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

I think I know where I can find him.

"I think I know where I can find him."

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Look-- over there!

"Look-- over there!"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Bicycle repairman!

"Bicycle repairman!"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

But how?

"But how?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Look!

"Look!"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Is it a stockbroker?

"Is it a stockbroker?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Is it a quantity surveyor?

"Is it a quantity surveyor?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Is it a church warden?

"Is it a church warden?"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

No!

"No!"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

It's bicycle repairman!

"It's bicycle repairman!"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

Why, bicycle repairman

"Why, bicycle repairman"

Monty Python's Flying Circus

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