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Clips from Cheers - Now Pitching, Sam Malone (S01E01)

Look, Sam. Just watch it, OK?

"Look, Sam. Just watch it, OK?"

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She's not one of your usual bimboettes.

"She's not one of your usual bimboettes."

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That's what I like about her. She's got a lot of class.

"That's what I like about her. She's got a lot of class."

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While I have never been a big fan of the women you date,

"While I have never been a big fan of the women you date,"

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I will say that at least they were too stupid to be harmful.

"I will say that at least they were too stupid to be harmful."

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I knew they'd grow on you.

"I knew they'd grow on you."

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Is there something between you two?

"Is there something between you two?"

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No. That's just business.

"No. That's just business."

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I never mix in her personal life and she mixes in mine.

"I never mix in her personal life and she mixes in mine."

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I've just been talking to my secretary about the winter schedule.

"I've just been talking to my secretary about the winter schedule."

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I think there might be some commercials you might do very well.

"I think there might be some commercials you might do very well."

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Me? You're kidding.

"Me? You're kidding."

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No. You have a very sexy, playful quality

"No. You have a very sexy, playful quality"

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that would come across on camera.

"that would come across on camera."

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Wait, I haven't played baseball for years.

"Wait, I haven't played baseball for years."

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I'm not exactly a household name.

"I'm not exactly a household name."

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Non-star athletes are in vogue. They come across as regular people.

"Non-star athletes are in vogue. They come across as regular people."

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What do you say, Sam?

"What do you say, Sam?"

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- I gotta think about it a bit. - Come on, do it. You're a natural.

"- I gotta think about it a bit. - Come on, do it. You're a natural."

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Look at you. You're tall, handsome, you got a great smile.

"Look at you. You're tall, handsome, you got a great smile."

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Show her your smile.

"Show her your smile."

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I'll be damned. Who the hell was I thinking of?

"I'll be damned. Who the hell was I thinking of?"

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You know, I have to admit, all these years watching those commercials,

"You know, I have to admit, all these years watching those commercials,"

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I always thought I might be pretty good.

"I always thought I might be pretty good."

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Let's do it.

"Let's do it."

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Wonderful.

"Wonderful."

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Look, I'm staying at the Ritz.

"Look, I'm staying at the Ritz."

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Why don't you come over later and we'll work out the details?

"Why don't you come over later and we'll work out the details?"

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I don't get off until two.

"I don't get off until two."

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All the better.

"All the better."

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All these people at the bar and no one introduced us.

"All these people at the bar and no one introduced us."

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No, they didn't.

"No, they didn't."

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I'd like to thank each and every one of them.

"I'd like to thank each and every one of them."

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Me, too.

"Me, too."

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Now for Fields Light Beer, former Red Sox pitcher, Luis Tiant.

"Now for Fields Light Beer, former Red Sox pitcher, Luis Tiant."

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After the game, I like to sit back, light up a cigar

"After the game, I like to sit back, light up a cigar"

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and enjoy a Fields Light Beer.

"and enjoy a Fields Light Beer."

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Hey, Luis. Hey, Sam.

"Hey, Luis. Hey, Sam."

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When you get to be my age,

"When you get to be my age,"

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30, you don't want to get filled up.

"30, you don't want to get filled up."

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That's why I drink Field Beer. It's refreshing, satisfying,

"That's why I drink Field Beer. It's refreshing, satisfying,"

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and you don't full feel with Field, you just full fine.

"and you don't full feel with Field, you just full fine."

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Full feel with Field, you full fine.

"Full feel with Field, you full fine."

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Sorry, Luis, I don't think you've got it. I'm pulling you out.

"Sorry, Luis, I don't think you've got it. I'm pulling you out."

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- Skipper, let me stay. - Sorry, big guy.

"- Skipper, let me stay. - Sorry, big guy."

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Go get them, Mayday.

"Go get them, Mayday."

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Now pitching, Sam Mayday Malone.

"Now pitching, Sam Mayday Malone."

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Fields, it's refreshing, it's satisfying.

"Fields, it's refreshing, it's satisfying."

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You don't feel full with Fields, you just feel fine.

"You don't feel full with Fields, you just feel fine."

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Alright!

"Alright!"

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Another save.

"Another save."

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I still get the win, don't l?

"I still get the win, don't l?"

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You were great.

"You were great."

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Coach, two bottles of Fields right here.

"Coach, two bottles of Fields right here."

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Normally I wouldn't use that to shampoo my dog but you sold me.

"Normally I wouldn't use that to shampoo my dog but you sold me."

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Sam, you could sell me ice cubes in summer.

"Sam, you could sell me ice cubes in summer."

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You're in showbiz now.

"You're in showbiz now."

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"You're a star."

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Sam, could you introduce me to Gene Tierney?

"Sam, could you introduce me to Gene Tierney?"

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- I don't know Gene Tierney, Coach. - OK, be that way.

"- I don't know Gene Tierney, Coach. - OK, be that way."

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Come on. How about a speech from the big actor?

"Come on. How about a speech from the big actor?"

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Yeah, how did it feel to see yourself up there, Sammy?

"Yeah, how did it feel to see yourself up there, Sammy?"

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It was nice. It was very nice, OK?

"It was nice. It was very nice, OK?"

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I was afraid of this. We have to sedate the man, he's hysterical.

"I was afraid of this. We have to sedate the man, he's hysterical."

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Sam, if there's anything you wanna talk about, get off your chest.

"Sam, if there's anything you wanna talk about, get off your chest."

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There's nothing I wanna talk about. I'm as giddy as a schoolgirl.

"There's nothing I wanna talk about. I'm as giddy as a schoolgirl."

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Just wait on some tables.

"Just wait on some tables."

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Fine.

"Fine."

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Sammy, that agent of yours is hotter than a pistol.

"Sammy, that agent of yours is hotter than a pistol."

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She's really earning her ten per cent.

"She's really earning her ten per cent."

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Listen, will you just leave me alone? Please, got that? Leave me alone.

"Listen, will you just leave me alone? Please, got that? Leave me alone."

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- Sam, let's talk. - There's nothing to talk about.

"- Sam, let's talk. - There's nothing to talk about."

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It's important. Come back to the office now.

"It's important. Come back to the office now."

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Sammy's in trouble with Miss Chambers again.

"Sammy's in trouble with Miss Chambers again."

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Sammy's in trouble with Chambers.

"Sammy's in trouble with Chambers."

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What do you want?

"What do you want?"

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Sam, you're obviously unhappy and everybody just wants to know why.

"Sam, you're obviously unhappy and everybody just wants to know why."

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I'm not unhappy.

"I'm not unhappy."

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- You're not? - No.

"- You're not? - No."

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- You're happy with the commercials? - Yes.

"- You're happy with the commercials? - Yes."

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- Think you were good? - Yes.

"- Think you were good? - Yes."

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- Really? - Yes.

"- Really? - Yes."

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Well, what is it, then?

"Well, what is it, then?"

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Are you happy with the money?

"Are you happy with the money?"

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yes.

"yes."

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- Are you happy with the auditions? - Yes.

"- Are you happy with the auditions? - Yes."

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- Are you happy with your agent? - Oh, God!

"- Are you happy with your agent? - Oh, God!"

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The Dragon Lady. Tell me about it.

"The Dragon Lady. Tell me about it."

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Why? You wanna hear me say you were right?

"Why? You wanna hear me say you were right?"

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Of course not.

"Of course not."

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Knowing that and knowing you know it and are tortured by it

"Knowing that and knowing you know it and are tortured by it"

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is plenty for this country girl.

"is plenty for this country girl."

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I'm sorry. I am sorry.

"I'm sorry. I am sorry."

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I do wanna help. Come on, let's talk.

"I do wanna help. Come on, let's talk."

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You wanna hear about my relationship with another woman?

"You wanna hear about my relationship with another woman?"

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Well,... Maybe...

"Well,... Maybe..."

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Maybe I should find a man out there

"Maybe I should find a man out there"

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who's intellectually capable of helping you.

"who's intellectually capable of helping you."

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All right, everybody line up for the ugliest tongue contest.

"All right, everybody line up for the ugliest tongue contest."

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Alphabetically by height, over here.

"Alphabetically by height, over here."

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It appears that all the other intellectuals are busy.

"It appears that all the other intellectuals are busy."

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You're sure you wanna hear this?

"You're sure you wanna hear this?"

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I'll stop you before I get the vapours.

"I'll stop you before I get the vapours."

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You see, my relationship...

"You see, my relationship..."

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Lana and I are a lot friendlier than most agents and clients.

"Lana and I are a lot friendlier than most agents and clients."

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Friendlier?

"Friendlier?"

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You know me. I'm never against a wild night of friend-making, but...

"You know me. I'm never against a wild night of friend-making, but..."

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There's some... Now I feel that I'm supposed to be friendly on demand.

"There's some... Now I feel that I'm supposed to be friendly on demand."

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And you're afraid she'll stop getting you commercials

"And you're afraid she'll stop getting you commercials"

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if you stop being friendly?

"if you stop being friendly?"

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When you play in the bigs like I did, you get used to attention.

"When you play in the bigs like I did, you get used to attention."

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When I stopped playing baseball, I felt something missing in my life.

"When I stopped playing baseball, I felt something missing in my life."

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I was just hoping that these commercials would get it back for me.

"I was just hoping that these commercials would get it back for me."

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Sam, Lana gave me a message for you but I can't remember it.

"Sam, Lana gave me a message for you but I can't remember it."

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- Lana's here? - That's it.

"- Lana's here? - That's it."

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By the way, what are you two doing? We got a lot of customers out there.

"By the way, what are you two doing? We got a lot of customers out there."

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I got a problem. Diane's helping me talk through it.

"I got a problem. Diane's helping me talk through it."

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Look, Sam, let me tell you something. You've faced a lot of tough problems.

"Look, Sam, let me tell you something. You've faced a lot of tough problems."

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You always found a solution but since Sir Isaac Hayes came along...

"You always found a solution but since Sir Isaac Hayes came along..."

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No offence, Diane, I love Sir Isaac Hayes,

"No offence, Diane, I love Sir Isaac Hayes,"

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