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Clips from Cheers - Now Pitching, Sam Malone (S01E01)

but since then, it's been talk, talk, talk.

"but since then, it's been talk, talk, talk."

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This is a pretty complicated problem, Coach.

"This is a pretty complicated problem, Coach."

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You see, Sam wants to break up with Lana, and he knows he should,

"You see, Sam wants to break up with Lana, and he knows he should,"

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but he's afraid that he will sacrifice his acting career.

"but he's afraid that he will sacrifice his acting career."

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- See? - I don't understand what's going on.

"- See? - I don't understand what's going on."

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Let me show you something. Come right down here.

"Let me show you something. Come right down here."

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Just, please, come right down here. Stand right here, Sam.

"Just, please, come right down here. Stand right here, Sam."

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- Pick that up. - What do you want me to do that for?

"- Pick that up. - What do you want me to do that for?"

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Just pick it up.

"Just pick it up."

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Now, get the hell out there and tell her you're finished with her.

"Now, get the hell out there and tell her you're finished with her."

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Please tell him it's more complic...

"Please tell him it's more complic..."

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Out. Hustle.

"Out. Hustle."

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What do you want me to do?

"What do you want me to do?"

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Hustle. I mean it.

"Hustle. I mean it."

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That was wonderful. Somehow, your instincts just told you...

"That was wonderful. Somehow, your instincts just told you..."

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Button it up, Diane. We got a lot of people out there. Move it.

"Button it up, Diane. We got a lot of people out there. Move it."

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Right.

"Right."

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Tell me something, Red.

"Tell me something, Red."

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Are professional athletes better between the old wamsuttas

"Are professional athletes better between the old wamsuttas"

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than ordinary men?

"than ordinary men?"

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I've had no experience with ordinary men.

"I've had no experience with ordinary men."

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Me neither, but I'm trying to work my way up to one.

"Me neither, but I'm trying to work my way up to one."

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Believe me, athletes take their pants off one leg at a time, like anybody.

"Believe me, athletes take their pants off one leg at a time, like anybody."

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They take off their pants?

"They take off their pants?"

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I'm glad you're here. There's something I want to talk about.

"I'm glad you're here. There's something I want to talk about."

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Sam, what do you think of your commercial?

"Sam, what do you think of your commercial?"

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- It was fine but listen.... - I thought it was wonderful.

"- It was fine but listen.... - I thought it was wonderful."

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I've had lots of calls about you.

"I've had lots of calls about you."

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- Calls? - A lot of people saw you.

"- Calls? - A lot of people saw you."

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And they liked what they saw.

"And they liked what they saw."

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One of those calls was an offer for you, a national commercial.

"One of those calls was an offer for you, a national commercial."

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It's big money, and they want to fly you to Hawaii.

"It's big money, and they want to fly you to Hawaii."

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You're going to do the commercial with the Osmonds.

"You're going to do the commercial with the Osmonds."

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The Osmonds.

"The Osmonds."

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- The whole family? - That's right.

"- The whole family? - That's right."

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- Even little Jimmy? - Well, we're hoping.

"- Even little Jimmy? - Well, we're hoping."

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Now, come on.

"Now, come on."

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Wasn't there something I wanted to say?

"Wasn't there something I wanted to say?"

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Later. We've got to get some pictures for you.

"Later. We've got to get some pictures for you."

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We should buy a new sports jacket.

"We should buy a new sports jacket."

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Afterwards, we can stop off at the hotel for a bite.

"Afterwards, we can stop off at the hotel for a bite."

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And a nibble.

"And a nibble."

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And a scratch.

"And a scratch."

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Coach.

"Coach."

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Sam, I'm getting real mad now.

"Sam, I'm getting real mad now."

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- Lana, we can't nibble any more. - Why?

"- Lana, we can't nibble any more. - Why?"

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I just don't feel right about it.

"I just don't feel right about it."

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I see.

"I see."

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Does this mean that you're no longer my agent?

"Does this mean that you're no longer my agent?"

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Sam, what kind of person would I have to be

"Sam, what kind of person would I have to be"

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to drop you as a client just because of this?

"to drop you as a client just because of this?"

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- A dragon lady. - I'm no dragon lady.

"- A dragon lady. - I'm no dragon lady."

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- Good. - But I am gonna drop you.

"- Good. - But I am gonna drop you."

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I've learned from past experience,

"I've learned from past experience,"

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once you've had an intimate relationship with a client,

"once you've had an intimate relationship with a client,"

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you can't go back to being just business associates.

"you can't go back to being just business associates."

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Perhaps it's time for me to find a new face.

"Perhaps it's time for me to find a new face."

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My face is new.

"My face is new."

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Good, you still have time to return it.

"Good, you still have time to return it."

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She's good, Sam.

"She's good, Sam."

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- So, that's it? - Yep.

"- So, that's it? - Yep."

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Good luck in finding a replacement for me in the Hawaii commercial.

"Good luck in finding a replacement for me in the Hawaii commercial."

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If it takes me longer than six minutes, I'll quit.

"If it takes me longer than six minutes, I'll quit."

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Boy, she is good.

"Boy, she is good."

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May I ask you a question?

"May I ask you a question?"

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You want to know how he was?

"You want to know how he was?"

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What?

"What?"

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You think I'm gonna stand here

"You think I'm gonna stand here"

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and listen to you tell me how good Sam was?

"and listen to you tell me how good Sam was?"

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Fair?

"Fair?"

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What do you wanna know?

"What do you wanna know?"

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I want to know how you can live with yourself.

"I want to know how you can live with yourself."

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I can't. That's why I like having young athletes around.

"I can't. That's why I like having young athletes around."

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I've always been crazy about them.

"I've always been crazy about them."

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Sometimes when I'm with one, I swear I can hear the crowd cheering.

"Sometimes when I'm with one, I swear I can hear the crowd cheering."

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I could understand this behaviour from an oversexed adolescent.

"I could understand this behaviour from an oversexed adolescent."

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- But you're.. - An older woman? Middle-aged?

"- But you're.. - An older woman? Middle-aged?"

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All the more reason to grab some youth.

"All the more reason to grab some youth."

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There was a time in my life when men would invent tricks and schemes

"There was a time in my life when men would invent tricks and schemes"

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to get my attention.

"to get my attention."

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Well, now I'm the one who schemes to get theirs.

"Well, now I'm the one who schemes to get theirs."

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That's not too unfair, is it?

"That's not too unfair, is it?"

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But don't be too concerned. Someday, even that won't work.

"But don't be too concerned. Someday, even that won't work."

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Don't judge me until the bloom is off your rose, honey. Ta-ta.

"Don't judge me until the bloom is off your rose, honey. Ta-ta."

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She is good.

"She is good."

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Fields, it's refreshing, it's satisfying.

"Fields, it's refreshing, it's satisfying."

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You don't feel full with Fields, you just feel fine.

"You don't feel full with Fields, you just feel fine."

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Alright!

"Alright!"

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Another save.

"Another save."

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Come on, admit it. I was good.

"Come on, admit it. I was good."

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Come on, say it. I was good.

"Come on, say it. I was good."

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- You were OK. - I wasn't OK, I was good.

"- You were OK. - I wasn't OK, I was good."

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What's it gonna do, kill you to admit it?

"What's it gonna do, kill you to admit it?"

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All right.

"All right."

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You were...

"You were..."

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Good.

"Good."

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Good.

"Good."

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You were OK.

"You were OK."

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You were good. And you did the right thing.

"You were good. And you did the right thing."

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Thanks. Hey, listen.

"Thanks. Hey, listen."

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Before you came to work at this bar,

"Before you came to work at this bar,"

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I never thought that much about morality and integrity.

"I never thought that much about morality and integrity."

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You made me aware of all that stuff for the first time.

"You made me aware of all that stuff for the first time."

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Thank you, Sam.

"Thank you, Sam."

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That's why I'm firing you. You can leave your apron right there.

"That's why I'm firing you. You can leave your apron right there."

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