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Clips from The Great North - Beef's Craig Beef Adventure (S02E02)

"with reversible belts and bottles of cologne."
The Great North
"Only a Sea-Doo can fill your Doo hole."
The Great North
"I think Wolf's right, Dad. All you do is fish,"
The Great North
"sleep an adequate four and a half hours"
The Great North
"and eat food for energy and not pleasure."
The Great North
"You should treat yourself."
The Great North
"Okay, fine."
The Great North
"Honestly, I would love a Sea-Doo."
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"But it's so impractical. Yet cool,"
The Great North
"In a Miami Vice Don Johnson kind of way."
The Great North
"- Love me some Don John. - I'm more of a Tubbs girl."
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"And this one has four seats, so we could all enjoy,"
The Great North
"in sensible shifts of four at a time."
The Great North
"But where am I gonna get an extra $900?"
The Great North
"I carefully plan every penny we spend,"
The Great North
"down to the lightbulb we'll have to buy next week"
The Great North
"when the one in the living room is scheduled to burn out."
The Great North
"- Voilà! - The Herring Run?"
The Great North
"I don't want to mess with the Herring run."
The Great North
"I hate it. All those boats and planes-- it's a circus."
The Great North
"How am I supposed to fish if I can't even hear the ocean?"
The Great North
"If I can't sense the puffins diving for herring,"
The Great North
"the whispers of the whales scooping them up?"
The Great North
"Dad, you won't need your sixth sense for fish."
The Great North
"I'll get my ex-girlfriend Lara to go up in her plane"
The Great North
"and spot for us."
The Great North
"Okay, but my ex-friend Craig Ptarmigan will he there,"
The Great North
"and I steer clear of Craig at all costs."
The Great North
"Dad, you got to give up this idea"
The Great North
"that Craig is your secret nemesis."
The Great North
"He-he is the sweetest sweetheart in town."
The Great North
"Not to me, he isn't."
The Great North
"He's had a grudge against me for years,"
The Great North
"and I don't know why. The man's out to get me."
The Great North
"Dad, just because you and Craig grew apart"
The Great North
"doesn't mean he's out to get you."
The Great North
"This is just like when Stacey B got popular and told me"
The Great North
"she was too cool to hang out with me."
The Great North
"Just a painless, mutual parting of ways."
The Great North
"Craig's a good guy, Dad. He gives so much to the town."
The Great North
"As they say at the Craig rocks."
The Great North
"And the slide he donated to the town playground"
The Great North
"is one of the best I've ever slid."
The Great North
"Sometimes I close my eyes and pretend I'm being swallowed"
The Great North
"by a giraffe. Pure bliss."
The Great North
"Dad, you shouldn't be thinking about Craig Ptarmigan."
The Great North
"You should be thinking about getting"
The Great North
"that mother-scratchin' Sea-Doo. Okay?"
The Great North
"Now, we'll all pitch in and catch just enough fish"
The Great North
"to buy that Sea-Doo, and no more."
The Great North
"Well, it would just be a day of fishing with you all,"
The Great North
"which is my favorite kind of day."
The Great North
"Let's do it."
The Great North
"Frang dang! Get ready to fill your Doo hole, Dad!"
The Great North
"Hmm. Where are you, old binoculars?"
The Great North
"Dad needs you for the Herring Run."
The Great North
"He prefers your vintage lenses. Oh, hey."
The Great North
"Who's this guy?"
The Great North
"♪ Bow, bow, bow, beautiful sea ♪"
The Great North
"♪ Bow, bow, bow, bow, come look at it with me ♪"
The Great North
"♪ B-Bow, bow, bow. ♪"
The Great North
"Whoa. A fish, but with... personality?"
The Great North
"Do you like my singing?"
The Great North
"Wait, did you just talk to me?"
The Great North
"I did. But the singing?"
The Great North
"Oh, thrilling. Don't stop."
The Great North
"I mean, I know the talking part is just my imagination, but..."
The Great North
"- Save me. - What?"
The Great North
"I hate it here in the shed. Take me to the sea."
The Great North
"♪ Beautiful sea, bow, bow, bow, bow ♪"
The Great North
"♪ Come look at it with me ♪"
The Great North
"♪ B-Bow, bow, bow, my ancestral home. ♪"
The Great North
"Let's get you home, friend."
The Great North
"Dusty and Londra and their crew look really impressive."
The Great North
"And intimidating. And kind of... sexy?"
The Great North
"I'm gonna file that away to explore later."
The Great North
"Wow, being 16 is a wild ride."
The Great North
"What's Craig doing near our boat?"
The Great North
"Dad, calm down."
The Great North
"He's just walking on his feet like we are."
The Great North
"Hey, Beef. I saw that you signed up."
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"Glad you could make it."
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"I just stopped by your boat, but you weren't there."
The Great North
"I was gonna give you this."
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"I've been collecting four-leaf clovers all year"
The Great North
"to pass 'em out today."
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"- Hope it brings you luck. - Aw, Craig."
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"Thank you kindly, Mr. Ptarmigan."
The Great North
"May the road rise to meet you."
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"And may the ocean put many fish"
The Great North
"in your pockets today, my friends."
The Great North
"Good luck my butt."
The Great North
"See? Craig Ptarmigan's not out to get you."
The Great North
"In fact, he got you this lovely gift."
The Great North
"Clovers should have three leaves, Judy."
The Great North
"I'm sure it's cursed. He probably got it from Gerald,"
The Great North
"that male witch who lives near the dump."
The Great North
"It's all part of Craig's twisted game."
The Great North
"So, Beef, what's your beef with Craig?"
The Great North
"I followed him on Snaphole"
The Great North
"and he seems like a total sweetie on social media."
The Great North
"Last week he posted a video of him"
The Great North
"bottle feeding a baby dolphin."
The Great North
"Well, growing up, we always sat next to each other in class"
The Great North
"because the teacher didn't know Ptarmigan started with a P."
The Great North
"So we became friends. We both liked pie"
The Great North
"and cake equally."
The Great North
"We always had the same number of teeth."
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"We even have the same birthday, which was so fun."
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"But after high school we just stopped hanging out."
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"And for the past 20 years,"
The Great North
"I feel like he's been messing with me,"
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"and I have no idea why."
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"- Messing with you how? - Well, one day I found"
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"a bucket of rotting chum on my boat and saw someone"
The Great North
"- who may or may not have been Craig walking away. - Mm-hmm."
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"And one time at Val-U-Buy, his cart, quote,"
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""got away from him" and crashed into our van."
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"I also have a suspicion that for years"
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"He's been replacing all my nets"
The Great North
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