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Clips from Veep - Crate (S03E03)

"Well, we all know she's no angel."
Veep
"She does drugs. She's got that tattoo..."
Veep
"Mom, what happened?"
Veep
"He hung up. He's such a jackass."
Veep
"But he's gonna make the call to Chung, right?"
Veep
"- That's not gonna happen. - Oh, Mom!"
Veep
"Oh, you are so annoying!"
Veep
"How do you not just punch yourself in the face?"
Veep
"- Call him back. - He's not going to answer."
Veep
"Who else can we call?"
Veep
"Oh, I don't know, Mom. Is there anyone else in our family"
Veep
"that controls the senior citizen vote in New England?"
Veep
"Because that'd be my next fucking call."
Veep
"This community center, it's got volunteers and homeless people?"
Veep
"And is there anybody else there?"
Veep
"An immigrant family from Syria who had a horrific time getting to America."
Veep
"They're gonna be good to talk to."
Veep
"Oh, ma'am, Oliveri Systems just withdrew its donations"
Veep
"and so has Dugdale Recycling."
Veep
"Just now."
Veep
"Yeah, it's out there."
Veep
"Quincy ran an online piece about the GUMMI code."
Veep
"- You're kidding. - No."
Veep
"I've got it right here."
Veep
"Any organization donating to the Meyer campaign"
Veep
"may want to reflect on how its tightfisted idiocy"
Veep
"is mocked by the woman on the $1,200 crate."
Veep
"Okay, well... ahem."
Veep
"Well, there's... there's just..."
Veep
"there's no way out of this."
Veep
"I mean, you know, not for a sitting vice president"
Veep
"who's lost Iowa and New Hampshire."
Veep
"You know what VP stands for?"
Veep
"It stands for Victory Permafucked."
Veep
"I don't deserve this."
Veep
"You know? God damn it."
Veep
"I don't, but you do"
Veep
"because you are all losers!"
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"Every motherfucking one of you."
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"Loser! Loser!"
Veep
"Madam Vice President, are all your donors idiots or just a select few?"
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"Is this your idea of fiscal responsibility?"
Veep
"- I'm Amy Brookheimer. - Relax, relax."
Veep
"- A little room, please. - Hypertension kills."
Veep
"- It's such an honor. - Did you know how much that crate cost?"
Veep
"- And when did you know it? - The vice president is not here to answer questions."
Veep
"She's here to reach out to the community."
Veep
"Listen, I'm so sorry about all of this."
Veep
"You're asking a rhetorical question and the answer is obviously no."
Veep
"- See this? - Mm-hmm."
Veep
"I'm done. I'm done."
Veep
"Take your lithium, jag-offs."
Veep
"God, it's so good to hear your voice."
Veep
"No, it's going much worse."
Veep
"Let's find us a house, Wendy,"
Veep
"where we can keep ducks."
Veep
"For us and the ducks."
Veep
"Of course, the kids, too."
Veep
"- Mike. - I have to go see homeless people."
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"And see if there's one with a pool."
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"This is Elida and Fadi."
Veep
"Hello, hi."
Veep
"Oh, I really want to hear your story."
Veep
"It is not a nice one."
Veep
"No, life can be... very challenging."
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"I mean, sometimes through no fault of your own,"
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"it's just one... disaster"
Veep
"after another disaster."
Veep
"Syria is very troubled."
Veep
"Hmm? Oh, mm-hmm. Right."
Veep
"Ahem, ma'am, um, Kent is here."
Veep
"He's acting weird."
Veep
"Not normal weird, weird-weird."
Veep
"What does that mean?"
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"Kent."
Veep
"- Ma'am... - What, are you okay?"
Veep
"Kind of, in a way, and also not."
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"And in a third way both."
Veep
"What are you talking about? What is it? Are we at war?"
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"Ma'am, we're America. We're always at war."
Veep
"Uh, the first lady... isn't in a good place."
Veep
"Oh, the hospital."
Veep
"Mentally."
Veep
"POTUS has decided that he wants to devote"
Veep
"more time to looking after her."
Veep
"Yikes."
Veep
"- At any rate... - Yeah."
Veep
"He's gonna resign."
Veep
"Oh. What?"
Veep
"Ma'am, you're about to become the 45th President of the United States."
Veep
"It's not a dress rehearsal, not a drill."
Veep
"You are going to be the president."
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"Now?"
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"We're not sure when, but very soon."
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"Uh... ahem."
Veep
"Where's POTUS gonna live, though?"
Veep
"- Where is he... - Yeah, 'cause doesn't he have to move?"
Veep
"Well, yeah, but that's none of your concern."
Veep
"- That'll be taken care of. - No, but does he have a house?"
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"Somebody will handle that."
Veep
"You don't have to worry about that."
Veep
"You okay?"
Veep
"I just... I just have to go to the bathroom."
Veep
"Do you know where it is?"
Veep
"I think it's behind you."
Veep
"Ma'am? Excuse me."
Veep
"Ma'am? Ma'am?"
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"Hi, ma'am. You all right?"
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"Yeah?"
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"- Gary... - Yeah, ma'am?"
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"Um, I'm gonna be president."
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"Of course you are."
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"I mean, there's always hope, ma'am."
Veep
"We've got plenty of hope in this world."
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"No, no, no, no. I mean, um..."
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"POTUS is gonna resign..."
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"and I'm about to become president..."
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"of America!"
Veep
"No, no, no. Oh, don't cry."
Veep
"Don't cry."
Veep
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