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Clips from Single Drunk Female - Sober for the D and V (S01E01)

"("Outta My Mind" by Monsune playing)"
Single Drunk Female
"♪ I've been waitin' for the right time ♪"
Single Drunk Female
"♪ To let you know that I've been looking for you ♪"
Single Drunk Female
"‐♪ All of my life ♪ ‐(vibrating)"
Single Drunk Female
"♪ Feels like walking on a landslide ♪"
Single Drunk Female
"♪ Let me take you... ♪"
Single Drunk Female
"(Bob chuckling softly in distance)"
Single Drunk Female
"♪ Ah ♪"
Single Drunk Female
"♪ Ooh, baby... ♪"
Single Drunk Female
"(moans)"
Single Drunk Female
"(Carol moaning in distance)"
Single Drunk Female
"♪ Ooh, baby... ♪"
Single Drunk Female
"(Bob moaning)"
Single Drunk Female
"♪ Let you out of my sight. ♪"
Single Drunk Female
"(vibrating stops)"
Single Drunk Female
"♪ ♪"
Single Drunk Female
"‐ALL: Surprise! ‐Happy six months sober."
Single Drunk Female
"‐Happy tenth birthday, young Dan. ‐SAMANTHA: Is that"
Single Drunk Female
"the cake that's been in the display case for four months?"
Single Drunk Female
"It is, which means you've been sober longer than"
Single Drunk Female
"this cake has been alive. How cool is that?"
Single Drunk Female
"Just bl‐blow out the candle. It's symbolic."
Single Drunk Female
"‐Yay. ‐Yes, all right."
Single Drunk Female
"Well, thanks for inviting me to whatever this was,"
Single Drunk Female
"but got to get this back to the bakery"
Single Drunk Female
"before they realize it's gone."
Single Drunk Female
"‐Bye, Doris. ‐Okay."
Single Drunk Female
"Great job."
Single Drunk Female
"What's with the mood? We throw you a surprise party,"
Single Drunk Female
"‐you can't even muster a thank you? ‐Sorry, rough morning."
Single Drunk Female
"Care to elaborate?"
Single Drunk Female
"Yeah, I'm not sure it's an appropriate conversation"
Single Drunk Female
"‐to have with you. ‐Well, nothing's off‐limits."
Single Drunk Female
"(clears throat) Okay. I heard my Mom"
Single Drunk Female
"doing it with Bob this morning."
Single Drunk Female
"They're still together. Wow, good for Carol."
Single Drunk Female
"That's not the point. The point is I was jealous"
Single Drunk Female
"she was getting laid, okay? If I don't see some action soon,"
Single Drunk Female
"this whole area's gonna break off and drift out to sea."
Single Drunk Female
"Six months sober is when it happened for me, too."
Single Drunk Female
"Your privates sacrificed themselves to the tide?"
Single Drunk Female
"No, I started to feel my body again."
Single Drunk Female
"You're just emerging from sobriety survival mode."
Single Drunk Female
"In the beginning, your body's like,"
Single Drunk Female
""Don't drink. I want to drink."
Single Drunk Female
"Don't drink. I want to drink.""
Single Drunk Female
"But you're not a walking nervous system anymore,"
Single Drunk Female
"you've settled in for the long haul,"
Single Drunk Female
"and all the normal feelings are coming back, like..."
Single Drunk Female
""I am craving Flamin' Hot Cheetos" or"
Single Drunk Female
""I'm horny as hell.""
Single Drunk Female
"I am horny as hell."
Single Drunk Female
"‐(clears throat) ‐Yeah."
Single Drunk Female
"I‐I don't... I don't know if he wants to hear about it."
Single Drunk Female
"Listen, I can't help you find someone,"
Single Drunk Female
"but you're coming to my sober dance party, right?"
Single Drunk Female
"I mean, dancing, there's gonna be a deejay,"
Single Drunk Female
"you can burn off some of that excess energy."
Single Drunk Female
"Really appreciate the invitation, but"
Single Drunk Female
"I'm trying to get laid."
Single Drunk Female
"Well, historically, there's been a lot of meet‐cutes"
Single Drunk Female
"at the Pellegrino table."
Single Drunk Female
"Uh, you know what, if it's okay with you,"
Single Drunk Female
"I think I'm gonna shoot my shot elsewhere."
Single Drunk Female
"‐Mm. ‐I've been laying a lot of groundwork,"
Single Drunk Female
"I'm pretty sure I can seal the deal."
Single Drunk Female
"Wow. Confident."
Single Drunk Female
"Oh, yeah. You should have seen me back in the day,"
Single Drunk Female
"it was like..."
Single Drunk Female
"I was really good at it."
Single Drunk Female
"I was."
Single Drunk Female
"No, seriously."
Single Drunk Female
"Oliv..."
Single Drunk Female
"So, how's‐how's work going?"
Single Drunk Female
"We have a IPO coming up."
Single Drunk Female
"But we don't have a money‐making strategy,"
Single Drunk Female
"so work's been a bit of a shit show."
Single Drunk Female
"But I have that..."
Single Drunk Female
"‐you know, the sobriety app, right? ‐Oh, the app, yeah."
Single Drunk Female
"Yeah. Showing a bit of interest with investors"
Single Drunk Female
"and all that stuff, so that's cool."
Single Drunk Female
"If anything, I can use it as a safety net, right?"
Single Drunk Female
"My ch‐my chest, I don't think isn't supposed"
Single Drunk Female
"‐to feel like this. Can we stop for a second? ‐Yeah. Sure, sure."
Single Drunk Female
"Uh, let's go stretch or something."
Single Drunk Female
"‐Oh, it's nice to sit. ‐Yeah."
Single Drunk Female
"You know, I, um, I heard the other day"
Single Drunk Female
"that exercise increases your libido."
Single Drunk Female
"Isn't that weird?"
Single Drunk Female
"Sure. It's weird. Where'd you hear that?"
Single Drunk Female
"Oh, this, like, new podcast I've been listening to."
Single Drunk Female
"Old Cosmos. Um..."
Single Drunk Female
"It's really hot out, isn't it? Oh, my God."
Single Drunk Female
"Hey, do you ever get, like..."
Single Drunk Female
"like, really sore right here?"
Single Drunk Female
"Yeah, yeah. I have a stretch for that."
Single Drunk Female
"‐Yeah? ‐Uh‐huh."
Single Drunk Female
"‐You stand up? ‐Yeah."
Single Drunk Female
"So... so, you just, like, cross your legs."
Single Drunk Female
"‐Yeah. ‐Right? Put your left leg over here,"
Single Drunk Female
"and your right leg, and then you just lean in..."
Single Drunk Female
"Whoa."
Single Drunk Female
""Whoa" good or "whoa" bad? What is..."
Single Drunk Female
"Oh, it's... it's bad, isn't it?"
Single Drunk Female
"'cause you're kind of, like,"
Single Drunk Female
"standing way far away from me now."
Single Drunk Female
"Sam. Come on, we can't do this."
Single Drunk Female
"I know it's a rule, but it's not like"
Single Drunk Female
"it's enforceable by law, okay?"
Single Drunk Female
"You're too new. You know?"
Single Drunk Female
"We act on anything, we can endanger"
Single Drunk Female
"your sobriety. You only have six months."
Single Drunk Female
"‐You know what? ‐Yeah?"
Single Drunk Female
"‐I can, like, feel the rejection. ‐Mm."
Single Drunk Female
"‐In my stomach. It hurts really bad. No, I'm not okay. ‐You okay? You okay?"
Single Drunk Female
"Why did you let me go jogging"
Single Drunk Female
"so many times? I'm not a jogger."
Single Drunk Female
"I mean, I couldn't tell that you weren't a jogger."
Single Drunk Female
"I'm so sorry."
Single Drunk Female
"Listen, we're on different timelines, you know?"
Single Drunk Female
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