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Clips from Weeds - A Modest Proposal (S05E05)

"Jeez."
Weeds
"You blew all that money on this crap?"
Weeds
"This crap and General Lee."
Weeds
"-Fuck's sake. -Please step away from the car."
Weeds
"Yes."
Weeds
"Please step away from the car."
Weeds
"Shit. God. Damn it."
Weeds
"Why do I have to do this?"
Weeds
"Because you're the only one I could trust not to get turned on."
Weeds
"Doug. Doug. Thank God you're still here."
Weeds
"I need a ride to the mall."
Weeds
"No can do. Gotta dry. If I smudge, people will know it's fake."
Weeds
"Yeah, that's how they'll know."
Weeds
"-Ask Andy. -I did."
Weeds
"Conflicting engagement with Ms. Pac-Man."
Weeds
"Well, have a nice walk to the bus stop."
Weeds
"Christ, I need a car. My fucking feet are killing me."
Weeds
"Maybe if you wore sneakers to work instead of changing into them there...."
Weeds
"Sneakers are the footwear of my corporate oppressor, Isabelle."
Weeds
"I thought you might as well be comfortable."
Weeds
"Think it's comfortable for me to work at Super Sneakers?"
Weeds
"Well, it's not."
Weeds
"But I will suffer for my beliefs."
Weeds
"You wanna know who else did that?"
Weeds
"Jesus."
Weeds
"I thought Jesus wore Birkenstocks."
Weeds
"Is she gone?"
Weeds
"Make sure you get it even."
Weeds
"Yeah. Hi, Andy, it's me, Nancy."
Weeds
"I thought maybe you'd pick up this time..."
Weeds
"...but you're probably really busy."
Weeds
"I gotta say, it kind of sucks that you've been avoiding me..."
Weeds
"...because I miss you, despite what you might think..."
Weeds
"...and I hoped that maybe by now you'd understand..."
Weeds
"...that I'm doing the best I can to deal with everything."
Weeds
"Maybe that's asking too much."
Weeds
"Oh, yeah, guess what."
Weeds
"Esteban asked me to marry him."
Weeds
"I know, right?"
Weeds
"No more Nancy Botwin. Mrs. Esteban Reyes."
Weeds
"Mrs. Somebody-Somebody-Else."
Weeds
"Isn't that weird?"
Weeds
"This is the part where I thought you'd laugh..."
Weeds
"...and make a joke about outlaws and in-laws and a fajita bar at the wedding."
Weeds
"Anyway, call me, come and see me."
Weeds
"Hope you're good."
Weeds
"Please don't have a moonshiner beard unless you plan on starting a cult..."
Weeds
"...in which case, go beard."
Weeds
"Bye."
Weeds
"Fuck."
Weeds
"Do I look even to you?"
Weeds
"-What? -I'm working on my tan."
Weeds
"I found this George Hamilton autobiography in the shitter."
Weeds
"This guy's a fucking genius."
Weeds
"He doesn't live anywhere. His friends put him up wherever he goes."
Weeds
"And he's constantly banging, like, Britt Ekland or Anita Ekberg."
Weeds
"And you know what, Silas? I wanna be like this."
Weeds
"And to be like the G. Ham, I need the tan, man."
Weeds
"I need the deep, dark, savage tan."
Weeds
"C.P. came by today."
Weeds
"He threatened us because his take's been light."
Weeds
"Of course it's been light. The fucking guy's always around."
Weeds
"No one's gonna wanna buy weed in front of bacon."
Weeds
"Skeeves people out. Like midgets."
Weeds
"He pulled a gun on me. Just messing around, but still."
Weeds
"What a douche."
Weeds
"Power corrupts, Silas."
Weeds
"-We need to fight the power. -Great."
Weeds
"How do you propose we do that?"
Weeds
"We ask ourselves, "What would George Hamilton do?""
Weeds
"What? Why?"
Weeds
"The man slept with his stepmother when he was 12 years old."
Weeds
"Clearly, he can do anything."
Weeds
"Okay. Next lesson."
Weeds
"Greetings and salutation."
Weeds
"Repeat after me."
Weeds
"Means "Go fuck yourself in the ass.""
Weeds
"This is fun."
Weeds
"Hey, fuck you, man."
Weeds
"No, this is fun."
Weeds
"What?"
Weeds
"You with the fucking names."
Weeds
"Yeah, new name."
Weeds
"Comes with a prize."
Weeds
"You like it?"
Weeds
"Turns out you were wrong."
Weeds
"It wasn't Ms. Dead Puta Whore after all."
Weeds
"It was Mrs. Esteban Reyes."
Weeds
"Though I might hyphenate."
Weeds
"Botwin-Reyes."
Weeds
"Just to keep my old self alive, being a modern woman and all."
Weeds
"I'm impressed, blanca."
Weeds
"You know, you remind me of my cat, Rosita."
Weeds
"I use to throw her off the porch..."
Weeds
"...and damn if that little bitch didn't land on her feet every time."
Weeds
"Of course, then I threw her off the roof and she went splat."
Weeds
"So why you come here?"
Weeds
"Invite me to the wedding?"
Weeds
"I wanted to share something with you."
Weeds
"We were eating--"
Weeds
"He has brioche made for me every morning, it's my favorite."
Weeds
"--and he said, "Mi amor, do you know that I would do anything for you?"
Weeds
"Do you know that I would even kill for you?""
Weeds
"He just kicked."
Weeds
"And you know what I said?"
Weeds
"I don't know, maybe you asked him to kill some loco DEA agent?"
Weeds
"Did you do that?"
Weeds
"Because if that was you, then, gee, thanks, you did me a solid."
Weeds
"Maybe soon we won't have this glass between us no more."
Weeds
"You're not going anywhere."
Weeds
"Hey."
Weeds
"We had some fun at the driving range yesterday."
Weeds
"What do you wanna do today, tennis?"
Weeds
"Wait. Wait. God."
Weeds
"God. Shit."
Weeds
"Fucking shoes."
Weeds
"Love your shoes."
Weeds
"Thank you."
Weeds
"I may work in casual but my heart is in couture."
Weeds
"Oh, honey, I've been there."
Weeds
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