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Clips from The Big Bang Theory - The Infestation Hypothesis (S05E05)

""Hey, Leonard, how was your dinfast with Priya last night?""
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"I don't know. Why?"
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"but Priya's gonna be calling any minute, so..."
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"Excuse me, that's Priya."
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"could be returned to the video store."
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"What name?"
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"♪ The Earth began to cool ♪"
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"♪ The autotrophs began to drool, Neanderthals developed tools ♪"
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"♪ Math, Science, History, unraveling the mystery ♪"
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"Thank you."
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"(machine hisses loudly)"
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"This is my sister you're talking about."
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"Oh, Leonard, good."
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"There you are."
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"Just his head, right?"
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"How about when you put GPS trackers in your garbage"
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"The chicken nuggets you were sure were human nuggets."
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"You need to remove that chair from the building."
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"Penny. Penny."
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"(clears throat)"
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"Okay."
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"bordering on the psychotic"
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"Its overuse in classic television sitcoms"
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"What? You're having trouble"
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"Almost. Really get your tongue in there."
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"I-I nibbled. I was being playful."
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"Sorry."
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"Sheldon sent you."
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"I thought you were my friend."
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"That's right, say my name..."
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"and beg me for more, 'cause..."
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"Check it out. Free chair."
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"Hey, you know, if this was in Sheldon and Leonard's apartment,"
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"Oh, uh, Priya's calling in a few minutes on Skype,"
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"and we are gonna have a dinner date."
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"It's 8:00 in the morning in Mumbai."
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"How can she have dinner?"
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"Fine, whatever."
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"Priya will be having breakfast."
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"All right, so technically it's not a dinner date."
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"I suppose you could call it a, uh, dinfast date."
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"But if you did, you'd open yourself"
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"to peer-based mocking, such as,"
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"That doesn't sound like mocking."
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"You didn't let me finish."
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"Dinfast."
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"Paraffin candles may contain carcinogens."
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"Unless lung cancer is the ambiance"
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"you were going for at your dinfast."
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"Dinfast."
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"Listen, I don't want to be rude,"
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"Oh, yes, Priya."
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"Leonard, you know I make a point of"
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"never interfering in your personal affairs."
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"Yes, I've always admired that about you."
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"As well you should."
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"But I'm going to make an exception here."
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"Oh, good."
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"Priya has moved back to India to pursue her law career."
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"Instead of desperately trying"
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"to keep this intercontinental relationship alive,"
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"you could use that time to take up a hobby."
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"A hobby?"
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"Yes."
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"I read recently about a fellow in Kansas"
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"with an enormous ball of twine."
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"I bet you could give him a run for his money."
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"You know, some people might say that it's great"
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"that we're trying to make things work long distance."
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"They'd say things like,"
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""Love is stronger than the miles between you"""
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"When I rise to power, those people will be sterilized."
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"You video-chat with Amy all the time."
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"How is this different?"
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"Don't you like Amy?"
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"Of course I like Amy."
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"Well, there's the difference."
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"(Skype ringtone playing)"
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"Hi, Leonard."
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"Hey, honey."
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"I miss you."
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"Oh, I miss you, too."
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"I miss the old days when your romantic partners"
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"Thanks for letting me stay here"
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"while Leonard Skypes with his girlfriend."
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"Oh, it's no problem."
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"It's actually kind of nice."
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"You reading, me reading."
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"We're like an old married couple."
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"If we were an old married couple,"
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"the wife would serve iced tea and snickerdoodles."
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"I don't have iced tea and snickerdoodles."
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"A good wife would go to the store."
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"I want a divorce."
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"Good. On the way to see the lawyer,"
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"pick up some tea and cookies."
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"(both chuckle)"
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"I must say, I am enjoying your new chair."
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"It's great, isn't it?"
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"It is."
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"Aligns the lumbar,"
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"cradles the coccyx, balances the buttocks."
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"This is a chair worthy of the name."
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"Chair."
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"Oh, all right, well, I'm glad you like it."
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"I mean, I still can't get over the fact"
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"someone just threw it away."
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"What?"
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"Yeah, it was just sitting on the street."
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"I paid a homeless guy ten bucks to help me get it up here."
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"(groans)"
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"Oh, dear. Oh, dear."
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"What is wrong?"
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"I've been sitting in garbage!"
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"Sheldon, take it easy."
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"You take it easy! I need to use your shower."
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"I went into this marriage with so much hope."
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"There's a wet Band-Aid on the shower floor!"
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"♪ Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state ♪"
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"♪ Then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started... Wait! ♪"
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