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Clips from The Big Bang Theory - The Infestation Hypothesis (S05E05)

"♪ We built the Wall ♪ ♪ We built the pyramids ♪"
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"♪ That all started with a big bang ♪"
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"♪ Bang! ♪"
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"The Big Bang Theory 5x02 The Infestation Hypothesis Original Air Date on September 22, 2011"
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"This is fun."
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"I've never used a hydraulic thermoforming press before."
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"Pretty sweet, huh?"
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"This little baby set the university back 175 grand."
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"That's three minutes."
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"Should we see what we got?"
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"Hang on."
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"Oh, yeah."
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"This is one good-looking panini."
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"Hand me the tuna melt."
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"Yep."
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"(machine hissing)"
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"How's it going with the long-distance love affair?"
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"Not easy, but we're making it work."
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"When you say "making it work," does that include"
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"doing the cyber nasty?"
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"What?"
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"You know, the virtual pickle tickle."
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"The digital... ♪ Bow-chicka-bow-bow. ♪"
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"Come on, dude."
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"Hey, Leonard jiggling his junk at her through a webcam"
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"has got to be easier for you to deal with"
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"than him actually touching her with it."
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"There's no junk jiggling."
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"We just talk."
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"Are you sane?"
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"With high-speed Internet, you have at your fingertips"
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"the greatest advancement in the field of sex"
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"since the invention of the washcloth."
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"I can't do that."
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"(chuckles) Well, if you don't,"
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"you're gonna lose Priya to some fancy guy in a turban"
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"who grew up with Kama Sutra coloring books."
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"How can you be so racist?"
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"Oh, come on, tell me I'm wrong."
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"I need you to check my head for chair lice."
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"I did it last night, I'm not doing it again."
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"I don't want to talk about it."
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"You didn't catch bugs from Penny's chair."
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"Yes, I did."
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"And now they're cavorting at the base of my hair follicles"
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"like dancing hippies at the Redwood National Forest."
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"Sheldon, you do this all the time."
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"You fixate on some crazy idea"
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"and then blow it way out of proportion."
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"Name one time I've ever done that."
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"because you were convinced North Korean spies"
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"were stealing your doodles?"
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"The strangely-shaped cloud"
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"that was following you around town."
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"The time you put on my shirt by mistake"
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"and were convinced you'd started growing again."
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"I said, "Name one.""
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"You really need to work on your listening skills."
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"Penny. Penny."
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"Yello."
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"It's a health hazard."
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"Okay, relax. I took off the slipcovers,"
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"Really?"
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"Yeah. It's cleaner than my couch."
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"Found half a Hot Pocket in there."
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"It certainly looks okay."
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"Has a strong toxic chemical smell."
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"That's reassuring."
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"Why don't you give it a try, Sheldon?"
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"All right."
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"(sighs softly)"
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"It is a comfortable chair."
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"Why don't you just admit you overreacted?"
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"No, thank you."
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"(insects chittering)"
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"(gasps)"
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"(door slams)"
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"It's like living with a Chihuahua."
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"Penny."
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"What's up, buttercup?"
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"You have to get rid of the chair."
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"Nope."
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"Penny."
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"Penny. Penny."
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"What's the word, hummingbird?"
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"For your safety, please wait in my apartment"
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"as I call the authorities so they may remove"
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"the chair of death."
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"No."
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"Penny!"
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"Penny! Penny!"
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"What's the gist, physicist?"
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"Under my authority as a self-appointed member"
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"of the Centers for Disease Control street team..."
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"...these premises are condemned."
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"(stutters)"
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"As a man with a keen sense of style,"
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"I must tell you, that chair does not work with the room."
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"Penny!"
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"Penny!"
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"(screams)"
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"Penny."
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"So, here we are."
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"Back in bed together."
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"Yep, here we are."
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"Okay, so I-I guess I'll just jump right in."
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"All right."
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"Uh, you're a naughty girl."
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"And-And, uh, I-I want to punish you with my love?"
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"What?"
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"Not good?"
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"That's terrible. Try again."
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"Uh, uh, you're... not naughty."
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"Uh, you're-you're-you're dirty."
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"You're..."
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"You're a-a dirty girl?"
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"Oh, yes."
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"Yes, I am."
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"You're a, you're a..."
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"You're a-a dirty..."
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