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Clips from Scrubs - My Cookie Pants (S08E08)

"I want you to go over there and help him through it."
Scrubs
"You really want me talking to him?"
Scrubs
"J.D.: I knew I couldn't fix Jo, but I could still give her a push."
Scrubs
"Well, I'm the new Chief."
Scrubs
"Way too soon, Bob."
Scrubs
"It totally sucks."
Scrubs
"- You all right? - Yeah, I'll get through it."
Scrubs
"and just let the moment happen."
Scrubs
"Fred, I got to go. He's gonna make me talk to him."
Scrubs
"Sure, I'll pass it on."
Scrubs
"Fred says you are a tool."
Scrubs
"I got nothing. That's a good one."
Scrubs
"Thank you."
Scrubs
"People showing up late, stealing supplies."
Scrubs
"Basically doing whatever the hell they want."
Scrubs
"Okay, as you can see, we've repaired the perforation."
Scrubs
"Are there any questions?"
Scrubs
"- I don't think you're doing this right. - Get out of here."
Scrubs
"Bottom line, if we don't get a new boss in this place soon, it'll fall apart."
Scrubs
"- Here's my office. - Okay, fine,"
Scrubs
"you go ahead and have fun spending your golden years"
Scrubs
"Look at that, he brought it back."
Scrubs
"Doctor."
Scrubs
"Don't worry, Mr. Hapburn. A lot of people are afraid of needles."
Scrubs
"that doesn't have a vagina."
Scrubs
"If you're not here, I'll just assume"
Scrubs
"I was here all by myself and I got a little freaked out,"
Scrubs
"so I thought I'd use that as a burglar alarm."
Scrubs
"That's catchy."
Scrubs
"Cookies are done."
Scrubs
"so that a dozen cookies lasts eight days."
Scrubs
"Well, 10 days because I don't eat sugar on Wednesdays,"
Scrubs
"and on Sundays I call my mom,"
Scrubs
"and she asks what's wrong with my phone because I sound fat."
Scrubs
"Anyway, I'm gonna go change. I brought my cookie pants."
Scrubs
"I finished my dozen."
Scrubs
"Why would you eat all of your cookies at once?"
Scrubs
"Still pretty smoky."
Scrubs
"So, he'd kill us?"
Scrubs
"I told Turk you were making cookies."
Scrubs
"I'm dating an idiot."
Scrubs
"Turk, get out of here!"
Scrubs
"Pull that piano crap on me. Please."
Scrubs
"I can't do this all on my own"
Scrubs
"No, I know"
Scrubs
"I got to go to work. I wish I had the day off, too."
Scrubs
"Hey, do you realize that we've already been dating for a week,"
Scrubs
"but we still haven't had sex?"
Scrubs
"Yes, but you know what? We're not gonna rush this time."
Scrubs
"Because tonight when you get home, I'm going to be waiting here,"
Scrubs
"and it's gonna be the most amazing, crazy night you've ever had."
Scrubs
"- Stop throwing dirty clothes at me! - Stop saying sexy things."
Scrubs
"Can't wait for tonight."
Scrubs
"J.D.: Mr. Lawton, one of my favorite patients, was back."
Scrubs
"- Jo... - What?"
Scrubs
"I was on cloud nine this morning. Had a good night's sleep, hot shower,"
Scrubs
"- I doubt it. - She doubts it."
Scrubs
"Okay, well, other than the abdominal discomfort, everything okay, sir?"
Scrubs
"Well, I'd feel better if this bed were a little more comfortable."
Scrubs
"Here. Lean up. Lean up."
Scrubs
"Thank you. And I'm sorry if I ruined your day."
Scrubs
"That was just the Board."
Scrubs
"- Shut up! - Yeah."
Scrubs
"Do you know what this means?"
Scrubs
"I can hire a second nanny to listen to her boring answer."
Scrubs
"Perry, look at yourself."
Scrubs
"Thank you."
Scrubs
"I'm feeling so open and vulnerable"
Scrubs
"Is there less drama this time?"
Scrubs
"Does it feel different?"
Scrubs
"Look at you not getting sucked in."
Scrubs
"enough for this whole thing to work out with Barbie this time."
Scrubs
"that Barbie wasn't here at work today, and I was hoping"
Scrubs
"that your relationship with her had already gone so far south"
Scrubs
"Carla, why won't you pick up? I need to talk!"
Scrubs
"I cannot believe that you leave the country"
Scrubs
"the week I get back together with J.D."
Scrubs
"I feel like that's not a coincidence."
Scrubs
"Wait. I didn't mean that."
Scrubs
"I know that your aunt did not fall out of that balloon on purpose."
Scrubs
"Plus, at my last appointment, I got in a fight with my waxer,"
Scrubs
"and now there is a rash on my bajingo"
Scrubs
"that looks like a thousand tiny spider bites."
Scrubs
"Damn it, Carla, I need tonight to be special"
Scrubs
"and that sometimes I'm selfish, but even if that's true,"
Scrubs
"I don't need to hear your attitude right now"
Scrubs
"because I am sick of it. Do you hear me? Sick of it!"
Scrubs
"I love you. Call me."
Scrubs
"What can I say? I just wish you were at home with her."
Scrubs
"- Damn it! - Hey, J.D."
Scrubs
"No, no, he had the same symptoms before."
Scrubs
"It turned out it was just heartburn."
Scrubs
"Who gives a crap?"
Scrubs
"I don't know, Jo. I think I do."
Scrubs
"Okay, no more sugarcoating. All right?"
Scrubs
"You will never be a good doctor"
Scrubs
"There's your buzzkill. Go back to work."
Scrubs
"No, I'm just taking a stroll. But thanks for your concern."
Scrubs
"Perry, why are you hating this morning?"
Scrubs
"- They did. It's a great opportunity. - It certainly is."
Scrubs
"They were a Christmas bonus. For both of us."
Scrubs
"but you spend most of your time dealing with bureaucratic garbage."
Scrubs
"And what with the budget meetings"
Scrubs
"you barely have time for a life. And what is your reward?"
Scrubs
"Dude, I can't answer that."
Scrubs
"How many people here are spies and are ordered to report"
Scrubs
"everything I say back to Carla?"
Scrubs
"I love my wife and I wanna be by her side at all times! All times!"
Scrubs
"Psst! Turk, come here."
Scrubs
"You look pretty."
Scrubs
"You guys are back together. I get that, it's great."
Scrubs
"You're a fit. I just don't wanna get caught in the middle again."
Scrubs
"Well, you should've thought of that before you jacked all my cookies."
Scrubs
"I've been rocking these bad boys since the day I retired."
Scrubs
"Huh."
Scrubs
"- Where's Mr. Lawton? - He's getting an endoscopy."
Scrubs
"Jo, please tell me you didn't order that procedure"
Scrubs
"even though I told you not to."
Scrubs
"Okay, I am so angry right now,"
Scrubs
"How'd the meeting go, Chief? Is it official?"
Scrubs
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