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Clips from Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Ted (S02E02)

"Don't give me the look. I'm on your side. But some things you have to accept."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"And Ted ain't one of 'em."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Hey, Cordy, nice outfit! - Oh, very funny."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Nice outfit? - Why don't you just keep your mouth shut?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"What's up with them?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- What's wrong? - I gave you a compliment."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- In front of your friends. They'll know. - Know what?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"That we kissed?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Like Stepford. Will you help me? - You know I will."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Yeah, it's a terrific product. No PC should be without it."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"As a matter of fact, it's a very expensive one,..."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"..which removes the risk of crashing your system."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Trust me, you won't be sorry. Thank you very much."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Knows everything about computers, never loses a client. If I sound bitter, I am."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Thank God he's takin' off for the wedding."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- The wedding? - He's got it set for two months from now."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Believe me, I am counting the days."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"We thank you for what we are about to receive,..."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Amen. - Amen."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Quite a bit. - Good for you."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"It's fantastic! Don't you think?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Looks good. - Well, little lady,..."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"..it's not just for looks. It's for building strong bodies."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Are you two engaged?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Goodness, no! What gave you that idea? - Joycie, let me handle this."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Buffy, your mother and I are taking it one step at a time."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"..maybe someday soon I just might ask her to tie the knot."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- I'd feel like killing myself. - Buffy!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"No, no. I told her to be honest."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Sweetheart, you should try and get used to me, cos you know what?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"That's where you can go."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"She'll come round."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"First of all, this is my room. Second..."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"What exactly is a "vampire slayer"?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- It's none of your business. - Beg to differ, little lady."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Everything you do is nothing but my business from now on."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Psychiatrists have a word for something like this: delusional."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"And you'll spend your best dating years inside a mental institution."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Your mother and I are going to be happy. You're not going to stand in the way."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Sleep tight."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Take your hand off me. - No."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"I was so hoping you'd do that."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Ted..."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Ted! Ted!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"You killed him!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Ma'am, I'm Detective Stein."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Sorry, but I need to ask you a few questions."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- We were, um, seeing each other. - Can you tell me what happened?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Down the stairs. He fell."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"I see. Did he slip? Do you know what made him fall?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"He was in my room... and we got into an argument."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"About what?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Was this the first time that you two had had an argument?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"No."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"He threatened me. He said that he would slap me."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- That was tonight? - No."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"It doesn't look like he hit you very hard."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- I don't bruise easily. - You've been hit before?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- I told you... - Before tonight?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Ted never hit you before tonight? - What do you want?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- I told you what happened. I didn't mean to. - I believe you. Things got out of hand."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Right now you should take her home and the two of you should try and get some rest."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Buffy!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Are you OK? - How come you're here?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"I couldn't stay at home. Mom won't even look at me."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"What happened? Unless you don't wanna talk about it."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"We had a fight and I lost my temper. Really let him have it."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- What was he? - What?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"I mean, we are talking creature feature here, right?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Oh, man. - I'm sure it wasn't your fault. He started it."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Yeah... that defence only works in six-year-old court, Will."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Court? Are they charging you with something?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"I don't know. Not yet."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Are you all right?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Oh, you needn't worry about them. They're just asking a few questions. Your behaviour..."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Of course, I told them you, uh..."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Man, this is killin' me! That bastard was up to somethin'. If I could get my hands on him..."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Besides, no way does Buffy put the big hurt on an innocent man."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Xander, do you have a pen? - If Buffy is jailed because of that creep,..."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"..I'm gonna lose it. He's gotta be in there."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"A history of domestic violence, a criminal record... Ooh! Cookies!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Buffy's the Slayer. Shouldn't she have... - What, a licence to kill?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Not for fun, but she's like this superman. Shouldn't she have different rules?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Sure, in a fascist society. - Right! Why can't we have one of those?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Buffy's not going to jail. It's not fair. - Whatever the authorities have planned,..."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"The guilt is pretty hard to bear. It won't go away soon."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Buffy's not in any shape to patrol. The least I can do is pick up the slack. Someone has to."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- You shouldn't go out without the Slayer. - Until Buffy regains her equilibrium,..."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Ted's got no criminal record. Damn, this guy's like citizen of the year!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Don't sweat it? - Yeah, cute buddy!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- What happened to "this is killing me"? - Worrying isn't gonna solve any problems."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Can I help?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"I've been meaning to clean out this junk for months."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Do you have homework?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- Mom, please, you have to know... - I can't. Not yet."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- OK... - What do we know?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- What is it? - I'm not positive, but I think it's dekfatorin."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"It's like a tranquilliser. Keeps you all mellow and compliant."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"This is evidence! This is real evidence that Ted was some kind of crook."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Buffy's cleared. Willow, you are the best human ever, I adore you!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"I got personal records, marriage certificates, and an address."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"I saw your car. I wanted to apologise."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"I was so harsh the other day. I am so sorry."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"I mean, I know how badly you must feel about putting me in danger before."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Well, it's official. This day can't get any worse."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- You died. - That's right, little lady. You killed me."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- What are you? - I'm a salesman."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"That's what you should have remembered. No matter how you put him down,..."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"..a good salesman always bounces back."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"You should have seen the intern's face when I got up. It was a hoot! Fun's over, though."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Say good night, big guy!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Oh, no!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Nice shot, lady!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"You're gonna find... Hell of a day! Makes you feel like you're 18 again!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"..that I don't like being disobeyed!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"Don't worry about me and your mother. We're gonna be very happy."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- I'll take the back. - Check for cookies."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"For evidence!"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"So far I've counted four marriage certificates."
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
"- So, either our boy was a Mormon, or... - Whoa! 1951?"
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
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