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Clips from Archer (2009) - Animation (S02E02)

"It's like it's made out of Wolverine's bones."
Archer (2009)
"You know? Because the..."
Archer (2009)
"Does nobody read X-Men?"
Archer (2009)
"I bet I could kill that pesky old worm."
Archer (2009)
"How? You gonna disappoint it to death?"
Archer (2009)
"- Hey, you know what...? LANA: Yes, I do."
Archer (2009)
"Beat it, Cyril, let the grown-ups work. But leave this, I'm starving."
Archer (2009)
"No. Give me that."
Archer (2009)
"Hey. Wait a damn minute. I said I was hungry."
Archer (2009)
"[SIGHS]"
Archer (2009)
"There. Now we don't have to reformat all those stupid things."
Archer (2009)
"- Brilliant. - Right?"
Archer (2009)
"Totally. Because how is the elevator supposed to work..."
Archer (2009)
"...with a jillion pounds of freaking computers on it?"
Archer (2009)
"[LINE RINGING]"
Archer (2009)
"Come on, pick up, pick up, pick up."
Archer (2009)
"- Cyril, what is going on with you? - Aah!"
Archer (2009)
"Nothing is going on."
Archer (2009)
"SPELVIN [ON RECORDING]: Hi, you've reached George Spelvin."
Archer (2009)
"[SPELVIN TALKS IN SPANISH OVER PHONE]"
Archer (2009)
"ARCHER: Um... - Hated that phone. Ha-ha-ha."
Archer (2009)
"Always dropping calls, you know?"
Archer (2009)
"Just like Cyril Figgis always does everything wrong, is that what you mean?"
Archer (2009)
"- Basically. - Well, for your information..."
Archer (2009)
"...Cyril Figgis knows how to beat the worm."
Archer (2009)
"Yeah, I bet."
Archer (2009)
"- The computer worm. - What...?"
Archer (2009)
"Krieger can't even beat it. Krieger, whose virtual girlfriend is so real..."
Archer (2009)
"...the state of New York is allowing him to legally marry her."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, Krieger-san."
Archer (2009)
"- Soon we will be married, yes? - Very soon, my little cherry blossom."
Archer (2009)
"...focus! KRIEGER: No!"
Archer (2009)
"- [VOICE DISTORTED] Krieger-san. - I'm here. No!"
Archer (2009)
"No!"
Archer (2009)
"You blew her up! Oh, damn you!"
Archer (2009)
"- So how is this going? - Not great."
Archer (2009)
"LANA: The worm is decrypting the agent list."
Archer (2009)
"Then, apparently, it's gonna upload them to an off-site server."
Archer (2009)
"- Oh, my God. - Plus now I'm going to die alone."
Archer (2009)
"...every ISIS agent in the field will be exposed."
Archer (2009)
"- Archer, do something. - Who am I, Alan Turing?"
Archer (2009)
"- Are we keeping you from something? - No."
Archer (2009)
"MALORY: Well? - Well what? Cyril was just..."
Archer (2009)
"So where are we? What's the plan?"
Archer (2009)
"I'm going to sell it."
Archer (2009)
"The Russians, maybe the North Koreans."
Archer (2009)
"But you can't do that."
Archer (2009)
"One moment, darlings."
Archer (2009)
"Of course I can."
Archer (2009)
"Once my little worm uploads the list to my server..."
Archer (2009)
"But it's not yours. You stole it."
Archer (2009)
"- Bought it, from you. - L..."
Archer (2009)
"- Well, okay, then sell it back to me. - Can't."
Archer (2009)
"- You just said you could. - Won't, then. Whatever."
Archer (2009)
"Here's the... Almost fifty thousand. Count it."
Archer (2009)
"- You'd still be about three zeros short. - What?"
Archer (2009)
"- Fifty million? - Seller's market."
Archer (2009)
"But that's not fair. Ow!"
Archer (2009)
"Just like every other choice every other human being has ever made..."
Archer (2009)
"- I just wanted to show them I could... - Them?"
Archer (2009)
"Or maybe your father, who never thought you quite measured up."
Archer (2009)
"- He... Hey, how did you know that? - I don't know, it was just a guess, really."
Archer (2009)
"- One is inclined to ask how. - I happen to be a kick-ass accountant."
Archer (2009)
"Damn, that's over half the cover list."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, I thought we were putting all our eggs in the battery-shutdown basket."
Archer (2009)
"It could take hours for this thing to bypass the electronic lock."
Archer (2009)
"Yes. Or no, I don't know. Who's asking?"
Archer (2009)
"Look, I just wanted to show everybody I could perform under pressure."
Archer (2009)
"- And just for once, be the guy who... Ow! - Who what?"
Archer (2009)
"Betrays the agency? And then begs me to save you?"
Archer (2009)
"- No, not me, all those field agents. - Ugh!"
Archer (2009)
"- Cyril. - Fifty thousand."
Archer (2009)
"- Mine. - But I already spent..."
Archer (2009)
"Mine! Take the suits to my tailor and the shoes to my shoemaker."
Archer (2009)
"Do you not?"
Archer (2009)
"- I am unbelievably angry right now. - That's good, you should channel that."
Archer (2009)
"Onto Spelvin, whose fault this is."
Archer (2009)
"Shut up and break it down. You've been inside, what's the layout?"
Archer (2009)
"Where's the primary ingress? Orientation. Are there windows?"
Archer (2009)
"Do they face west? Can we use the sun to our advantage?"
Archer (2009)
"I'm pretty sure it has windows."
Archer (2009)
"[TIRES SCREECHING]"
Archer (2009)
"- Give me the gun. - No. Why?"
Archer (2009)
"We're here, idiot."
Archer (2009)
"- Oh. - Once in, give this to Spelvin."
Archer (2009)
"It's full of counterfeit bearer bonds."
Archer (2009)
"- Where did you get counterfeit bonds? - Don't open it."
Archer (2009)
"There's a canister of knockout gas wired to the latch."
Archer (2009)
"- Cool. - Duh. Okay, try not to screw..."
Archer (2009)
"- Wait, it's just Spelvin up there, right? - Um..."
Archer (2009)
"- Cyril. - There's probably two..."
Archer (2009)
"Well, you say that."
Archer (2009)
"LANA: Damn it, the worm has got the list."
Archer (2009)
"How long will it take to upload it to the server?"
Archer (2009)
"CYRIL: Yep. Fifty million dollars in real bearer bonds..."
Archer (2009)
"...which are real. - Unbelievable."
Archer (2009)
"- Well, like I said... - No. Literally, I don't believe you."
Archer (2009)
"- Just open it up and look. - At what, Cyril?"
Archer (2009)
"Uh, apparently not."
Archer (2009)
"[DOOR OPENS]"
Archer (2009)
"Exactly. Because I don't even know if that's a real thing."
Archer (2009)
"Okay, Spelvin, where's the ISIS cover list?"
Archer (2009)
"Hello, kitties."
Archer (2009)
"Listen, if you're not busy after, we should grab a drink or... What?"
Archer (2009)
"- You said they were sexy. - Ninjas are sexy."
Archer (2009)
"- Right? - I mean, I think so."
Archer (2009)
"- Good. - Ugh."
Archer (2009)
"I don't wanna hurt you, ladies."
Archer (2009)
"So how about we all just put our swords down."
Archer (2009)
"But you don't have a sword."
Archer (2009)
"- Can I? - Of course. Why not?"
Archer (2009)
"Keiko-chan, katana."
Archer (2009)
"- You're just set on doing this, huh? SPELVIN: Yes, we are."
Archer (2009)
"[YELLING]"
Archer (2009)
"[BOTH GRUNTING]"
Archer (2009)
"Gotcha."
Archer (2009)
"- That was a gift. - Shut up."
Archer (2009)
"- Do you hear that? - What?"
Archer (2009)
"Do you hear this?"
Archer (2009)
"Oh, I think so."
Archer (2009)
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