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Clips from Arrested Development - Hand to God (S02E02)

"and gone to a local Ford dealership."
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"Yeah, the Bronco's been discontinued."
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"We're trying to shed that whole "fugitive on the run" thing."
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"- This is the Escape. - What a fun name, hmm?"
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"- Mm-hmm. - May I test-drive?"
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"- [Tires Screeching] - [Horn Honks]"
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"- Up yours, granny! - [Lucille] You couldn't handle it!"
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"[Narrator] Soon, Michael and George Michael arrived at the hospital."
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"- If something happens to Buster, I'll be lost. - Yeah. Excuse me."
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"George Michael, you're going to have to be the baby of the family."
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"- Um, Maeby's younger than me. - You're never going in the ocean! Never!"
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"- We're here to see him. - You're my baby! I'm never letting you go!"
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"The hell with all of you. I have a man."
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"- [Gasps] - [Doctor] Excuse me."
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"- Are you the Bluths? - [Lucille] Not Dr. Wordsmith."
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"- How's my son? - He's going to be all right."
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"- Thank God. - [Lindsay] Finally some good news from this guy."
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"- No other way to take that. - That's a great attitude."
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"I gotta tell you. If I was given this news, I don't know that I'd take it this well."
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"But you said he was all right."
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"Yes. He's lost his left hand, so he's going to be "all right.""
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"You son of a bitch! I hate this doctor!"
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"I don't have to go to army because the seal with the bow tie attacked me."
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"- I feel like I've lost three pounds. - Seal with the bow tie?"
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"Yeah. I think that's what I saw bite me."
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"I just wish I could remember why I went in the ocean. Did we fight or something?"
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"Of course not."
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"Although I always have warned you against the ocean. So has your father."
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"My father."
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"George Sr. You need more juice."
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"Where's the juice? Give my son the juice!"
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"- You know, like a transplant. - I'm fine."
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"This is a blessing. And speaking of blessings, I heard there's gonna be a baby."
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"- [Giggling] - Oh, yeah, yeah. But please, don't worry about that."
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"What's more important is that you're really doin' well with this, pal."
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"- Hand transplant. - [Forced Laugh]"
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"No, the, uh, baby. The mother doesn't want me around."
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"We kind of had a little bit of a fight."
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"- No, a seal didn't bite my Linus off. - Good."
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"- Then go to her. Ask for her hand. - Yeah."
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"And, uh, maybe..."
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"I'll get one for my brother while I'm at it."
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"- Yeah. Get him out of here. - [Laughing]"
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"Get the- [Bleeps] Out of my room!"
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"- Oh, my God! Buster! - Oh, my God!"
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"- Buster, what's wrong? Nurse! - [Screaming]"
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"[Narrator] So, at his brother's suggestion..."
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"- Have you seen Maggie? It's kind of important. - Oh, you just missed her."
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"- Go get 'em. - He spanked me!"
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"- Did you spank her? - No!"
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"You know, that waitress she's representing is suing my client for making her fat."
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"Maggie bought her a fat suit, and I've got the receipt to prove it."
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"Of course. That's what the fat suit is for."
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"Friday night. You might want to try Miss Temple's. Tell her Barry said-"
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"- [Spanks] - Ooh, I did good today."
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"You know, there have been lies, yes."
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"But it's not like either one of us would ever do anything to hurt the other person."
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"Hello, Officers."
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"And since you haven't called us back, we again left the number, in case there's a problem."
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"Hey, the break-in? I told you that was us."
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"- The only reason you're here is out of loyalty to the baby. - It's not just about the baby."
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"Maggie, there was a reason that you and I got together in the first place..."
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"when we made this baby, okay?"
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"Well, then I have to come clean about one more thing."
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"- Oh, no. - You're not the father."
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"Come on."
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"I went to a sperm bank, okay, the week before we even met."
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"That's great. He's probably some geek Simpsons writer's kid."
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"I never thought I'd meet someone like you."
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"- Mmm. - But come on."
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"I mean, do you still really want me?"
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"Are you really that great of a guy?"
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"[Narrator] Michael had always thought ofhimself as that great a guy."
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"- The kind of guy who could raise someone else's baby. - Of course I am."
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"[Narrator] But he wasn't..."
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"- and he regretted it the moment he said it. - [Mouthing Words]"
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"[Narrator] The next day, the family gathered to welcome Buster home from the hospital."
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"He's coming. What he's wearing is temporary."
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"Please don't comment on it or salute him like that idiot guard down there did to him."
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"Well, look who's back."
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"- Let's all say hello. - Hi."
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"[Forced Laughing]"
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"George Michael, get your uncle a bandage for his forehead."
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"And while you're at it, uh, get two."
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"Oh, my God."
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"Guess this means you don't wanna play "got your nose" with me."
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"[Forced Laughing]"
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"Oh, what's the matter, Buster?"
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"- Did you hurt yourself? - Uh, hi, Gob."
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"Buster went swimming in the ocean..."
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"and, according to him, a seal with a bow tie bit off his hand."
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"It's merely the playful mutterings of the shock victim."
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"A seal would never prey on a human..."
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"unless, of course, it had acquired a taste for mammal blood."
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"[Narrator] Gob had recently dressed a seal in a bow tie..."
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"and used him in a magic trick."
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"You're back in the real world. You're not gonna be hand-fed anymore."
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"How the hell would a seal know how to tie a bow tie anyway?"
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"- I can barely tie the yellow one that I wear in my act. - This one had a yellow bow tie!"
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"[Narrator] And later, Lucille could not contain her guilt any longer."
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"I did this. I prayed that God take anything he wanted from us..."
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"so that Buster wouldn't have to go to war."
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"Oh, Mom. After all these years, God's not gonna take a call from you."
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"[Gob] I did this."
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"I think that the seal with the yellow bow tie might be the one..."
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"that I released into the sea after giving it the taste for mammal blood."
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"Okay. You've got a better case than Mom does."
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"Still, I could hunt down that seal."
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"They said if you retrieve Buster's hand, they might be able to do a transplant."
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"and the child that wasn't his."
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"Well, first of all, I'm sure there are writers on The Simpsons who aren't geeks."
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"It is. It's great, it's great."
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"I do think something might be up though. What if she's still lying?"
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"- L-I thought you were a good guy. - I am a good guy."
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"- Is he trying to get out of having this baby? - We want this child."
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"It's given us a reason to stay together."
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"that had reignited Lindsay and Tobias's passion."
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"It was weird."
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"- Where's your child? - I don't have a child, Michael."
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"- We don't have a child, Michael. - That's why we want-"
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