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Clips from Seinfeld - The Outing (S04E04)

"What is the big deal? How many times do we have to..."
Seinfeld
"...celebrate that someone was born?"
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"I don't wanna live."
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"- You're something. - You can do better than me."
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"You could throw a dart out the window and hit someone better."
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"So what could I do? I couldn't go through with it."
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"She threatened to kill herself."
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"Maybe he'll take me."
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"No, I'm gonna go with him."
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"Unbelievable. She's not there."
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"- What paper does she write for? - For the NYU school newspaper."
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"She's a grad student in journalism. Never been to a comedy club."
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"I got news for you. Golda Meir could make them all run up a tree."
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"You know you'll always be the only man I'll ever love."
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"Come on, Jerry. Go along. Go along."
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"Yeah, because I'm single, I'm thin, and I'm neat."
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"And you get along well with women."
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"I'm here at the coffee shop, and I was a little late."
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"Yeah. How did you know that?"
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"You told me that already. Like two months ago."
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"What do you think of this shirt?"
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"Well..."
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"Allison bought it for me."
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"I guess I have to wait for her to die."
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"- Who's that? - Oh, that's that reporter from NYU."
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"- Do you want me to stay or...? - Sure, I don't care."
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"You look familiar."
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"Why don't we do this over here? This is George."
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"Oh, hi. Nice to meet you."
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"- Okay. - Okay."
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"There we go."
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"It always sounds so high and whiny."
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"Okay, let's see. Are you just a comedian, or do you do anything else?"
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"You hear the way he talks to me?"
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"You should hear how my boyfriend talks to me."
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"So how did you two meet?"
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"Actually, it was in gym class. I was trying to climb the ropes..."
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"And then finally I slipped, and I fell on Jerry's head."
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"They don't know what's going on."
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"Oh, no! No!"
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"Come on! Let's go, baby! Come on!"
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"The whole thing's your fault."
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"You want me to talk to her? I'd be perfectly willing to."
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"Boy."
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"I'm gonna get one myself."
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"Wait, wait. I wanna get the first call."
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"- Okay, later. - All right, I'll talk to you later."
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"She's not gonna play up that angle in the story."
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"All right, I'll get rid of her. Hold on."
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"- Yes, I heard you. - Maybe she was disconnected."
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"...are nobody's business but their own."
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"So she kept insisting I take off my coat."
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"I refused, and then she forcibly tried to get me to remove it."
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"Take your coat off, already."
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"- Here you go. Happy birthday. - Thank you."
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"Guys and Dols? Isn't that a lavish Broadway musical?"
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"- All right. - All right, well..."
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"The Colected Works of Bette Midler."
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"I mean, how could you two keep this a secret from me?"
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"Come on, Jerry, the masquerade is over."
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"Mrs. Seinfeld?"
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"By mistake. By mistake, Jerry. I'm sorry."
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"It has nothing to do with the culottes."
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"I'm Buck Naked."
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"You're who? Buck Naked?"
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"Jerry, I can see. He's so neat and thin."
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"Of course not."
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"Six-thirty already? I fell asleep."
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"- The water's nice and warm, isn't it? - Oh, that feels really good."
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"George, I'm talking to you!"
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"Nothing can make me keep my voice down!"
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"If you boys cannot control yourselves..."
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"When she sees it, she's gonna think..."
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"Well, this is nice. They mention your name."
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"- I will. - What do you mean, you will?"
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"Oh, can you ever forgive me?"
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"I don't know."
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"All right, I forgive you."
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"- What-? What's going on? - Yeah, what's going on?"
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"- Are you crazy? - Tell her, Jerry. Tell her."
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"It's not true! It's not true!"
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"Not that there's anything wrong with that."
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"Not that there's anything wrong with that."
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"When someone is thin, single and neat..."
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"- Yeah, I washed it. - It looks like it hasn't been washed."
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"So wash it."
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"What?"
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"Hey, let me ask you something."
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"What do you think of this shirt?"
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"It's nice."
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"Jerry said he didn't like it."
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"- You said you didn't like it. - Oh, well, so what if I don't like it?"
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"Is that, like, the end of the world or something?"
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"Oh, actually, we met in a gym locker room."
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"...and Jerry was spotting me."
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"And I kept slipping and burning my thighs."
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"We've been close ever since."
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"- Live together? - No, I got my own place."
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"- Know what? - My parents?"
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"You're that girl in the coffee shop that was eavesdropping."
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"I knew you looked familiar."
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"- I better get going. - There's been a big misunderstanding."
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"We did that for you. We knew you were eavesdropping."
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"That's why my friend said all that. It was on purpose. We're not gay."
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"Not that there's anything wrong with that."
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"- Absolutely. - I mean, I have gay friends."
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"- My father's gay. - Look, I know what I heard."
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"- Heard. It was a joke. - You wanna have sex right now?"
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"Do you wanna have sex with me right now? Let's go."
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"Hey, come on. Let's go. I thought we were gonna take a steam."
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"- No, I don't want any steam. - No. No steam."
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"Well, I don't wanna sit there naked all by myself."
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"- I don't think so. - You know me..."
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"...I walk into a room, problem solved."
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"She says she'll think about it."
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"So what, even if it does come out. It'll just be in an NYU paper."
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"Why don't you take your jacket off?"
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"- No, I'm okay. - I'm gonna try her again."
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"Well, I think I know when my birthday is."
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"Yeah, well, you'd think so, but you'd be wrong."
Seinfeld
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