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Clips from Seinfeld - The Airport (S04E04)

"Everything on planes is tiny. Tiny food, tiny liquor bottles, tiny pillows..."
Seinfeld
"Everyone's in a cramped seat working on a tiny computer."
Seinfeld
"...so you can walk down the narrow hallway."
Seinfeld
"Could you shut up?"
Seinfeld
"And it smells like a cheap hooker."
Seinfeld
"Or is that you?"
Seinfeld
"- And here's the beauty. - What?"
Seinfeld
"George is picking us up at the airport."
Seinfeld
"He always brags about his vertical leap..."
Seinfeld
"He's waving at it."
Seinfeld
"So I told him if he picks us up at the airport, he wouldn't have to pay me."
Seinfeld
"Timed out perfectly."
Seinfeld
"- Where you going? - JFK."
Seinfeld
"- You can't ask him. - Let's see what he says."
Seinfeld
"People like you?"
Seinfeld
"- Come on, seriously. - Well, since you asked."
Seinfeld
"- Five dollars a bag? I don't think so. - Look, you asked, I told you."
Seinfeld
"JFK."
Seinfeld
"Wait up."
Seinfeld
"- We'll take them. - We won't sit together?"
Seinfeld
"My mistake."
Seinfeld
"...pick up their bags, and be walking out of the terminal as we roll up."
Seinfeld
"- What are you doing? - What?"
Seinfeld
"You know what the traffic will be like? This is a suicide mission!"
Seinfeld
"The Grand Central. The Van Wyck. You've destroyed my whole timing."
Seinfeld
"Do you know what happens if I miss him?"
Seinfeld
"I'll have a chance to go to the duty-free shop."
Seinfeld
"- The duty-free shop? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"- You know how much duty is? - Duty?"
Seinfeld
"Well, I'd still like to stop at the duty-free shop."
Seinfeld
"Turn to page 146."
Seinfeld
"What is this an ad for?"
Seinfeld
"See those wrinkled jeans slung over the chair?"
Seinfeld
"We'll get there."
Seinfeld
"Oh, look at this."
Seinfeld
"They probably took it off the board!"
Seinfeld
"There it is, honey. Gate 18A, 8:30."
Seinfeld
"I know that guy."
Seinfeld
"Gotta get my TIME magazine. Never miss my TIME."
Seinfeld
"Gee, I'm sorry. I got here first."
Seinfeld
"A blurb? You're a blurb. Check out the cover, idiot."
Seinfeld
"...sentence, that is. You miserable..."
Seinfeld
"Excuse me. I've gotta go to the bathroom."
Seinfeld
"I've gotta go to the bathroom."
Seinfeld
"Would you move your seat up, please?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, my, that is refreshing."
Seinfeld
"Please."
Seinfeld
"Why, it's a perfect fit. You must be Cinderella."
Seinfeld
"My name is not mentioned in this blurb."
Seinfeld
"...disappears."
Seinfeld
"And that's the guy. John Grossbard."
Seinfeld
"Kramer, come on. It was 240 bucks 20 years ago."
Seinfeld
"- Let go of me. - Kramer, you cannot go back."
Seinfeld
"We must go forward. Not back."
Seinfeld
"Ladies and gentlemen, this is the captain."
Seinfeld
"...we've been instructed by the tower to reroute and land at JFK."
Seinfeld
"The plane's rerouted back to Kennedy. We got 45 minutes."
Seinfeld
"- Tuscany. - Tuscany."
Seinfeld
"Look. This plane is full."
Seinfeld
"You're just gonna have to wait."
Seinfeld
"I'm not giving you my card unless you tell me what it's for."
Seinfeld
"He asked me. But you were gone so long, I thought you switched seats."
Seinfeld
"I would know if a tray of food had been served to me."
Seinfeld
"A kosher meal? I don't want a kosher meal."
Seinfeld
"I don't even know what a kosher meal is."
Seinfeld
"I ordered the kosher meal."
Seinfeld
"Hey, I got earplugs to collect. Do you want it or not?"
Seinfeld
"- This is the best sundae I've ever had. - Oh, man."
Seinfeld
"They got the fudge on the bottom."
Seinfeld
"- More anything? - More everything."
Seinfeld
"You bought nonrefundable tickets. You idiot."
Seinfeld
"Hey."
Seinfeld
"Kramer!"
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"George!"
Seinfeld
"Excuse me."
Seinfeld
"What is your name?"
Seinfeld
"Elaine Benes."
Seinfeld
"But there was nobody sitting here."
Seinfeld
"You know, our goal should be a society without classes."
Seinfeld
"Sir, this woman tried to sneak into first class."
Seinfeld
"Hey!"
Seinfeld
"Couldn't be."
Seinfeld
"That was the worst flight I've ever been on in my entire life."
Seinfeld
"- You guys ready? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"...little bathrooms that they have on the plane."
Seinfeld
"It's like a small apartment of your own on the plane."
Seinfeld
"You ever fly standby? It never works."
Seinfeld
"I was on this plane where the flight attendant-"
Seinfeld
"Here's just some regular person coming over, going:"
Seinfeld
"Who the hell are you?"
Seinfeld
"Yeah, well, then I'm the pilot, all right?"
Seinfeld
"...tiny bathroom, tiny sink, tiny soap."
Seinfeld
"Always a small problem. Be a slight delay."
Seinfeld
"You'll be a bit late. If you could be a little patient."
Seinfeld
"We're just trying to get one of those little trucks..."
Seinfeld
"...to pull us a little closer to the Jetway..."
Seinfeld
"There'll be a man in a tight suit. He'll tell you you have little time..."
Seinfeld
"Hey, could you do me a favour?"
Seinfeld
"- I don't want to do that. - Come on. Just do it."
Seinfeld
"- No, I don't like to do this. - Elaine, just get it."
Seinfeld
"- My hand is stuck. - Okay, don't fool around."
Seinfeld
"- My hand. My hand! - Don't- Jer- All right, fine."
Seinfeld
"Elaine."
Seinfeld
"Hey, guess what."
Seinfeld
"- This window doesn't work. - I hate rental cars. Nothing ever works."
Seinfeld
"Window doesn't work. Radio doesn't work."
Seinfeld
"Give me 10 bucks and find out."
Seinfeld
"So this worked out pretty good."
Seinfeld
"Them giving me an extra ticket. You get a trip to St. Louis. I did my gig."
Seinfeld
"- Get out of here. Why? - You know that awning..."
Seinfeld
"- ... outside my building? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"...so I bet him 50 bucks that he couldn't touch the awning."
Seinfeld
"- So, what happened? - He didn't come within 2 feet of it."
Seinfeld
"Hey, how we doing on time?"
Seinfeld
"Drop off the car, pick up the rental-car shuttle, we walk on the plane."
Seinfeld
"- Wait up! - Wait up!"
Seinfeld
"- Sorry. - Wait!"
Seinfeld
"I need some small bills for a tip, got any?"
Seinfeld
"- Yeah. You want a 5? - Give me a 10."
Seinfeld
"- You're giving him $10? - Well, we got three bags."
Seinfeld
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