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Clips from Community (2009) - The Politics of Human Sexuality (S01E01)

"As the best athlete on campus, I need you to run to my office"
Community (2009)
"- You're a really good friend. - No, Abed..."
Community (2009)
"Back already. Detail time?"
Community (2009)
"I have stuff to work on."
Community (2009)
"So could I borrow 200 bucks?"
Community (2009)
"The characteristic of an asset to donate or accept a proton"
Community (2009)
"cannot be quantified for individual species."
Community (2009)
"You would give a glass of water?"
Community (2009)
"You stick to quotin' movie lines."
Community (2009)
"You and I are playing real basketball, right now."
Community (2009)
"Congratu... Horrible!"
Community (2009)
"And I'm taking doreen to annie's mixer tonight."
Community (2009)
"There's a joke here."
Community (2009)
"You're gonna be center stage showing everyone"
Community (2009)
"Do I know your name?"
Community (2009)
"The women literally have no identities."
Community (2009)
"- But I'm gonna screw it up. - Well, it's easy enough to practice."
Community (2009)
"And he cried after. And during."
Community (2009)
"So you, uh, you never seen one when you were growing up?"
Community (2009)
"Like, you know, on the internet, in a picture, or Harvey Keitel's?"
Community (2009)
"I just want to figure out how to do it and get it over with."
Community (2009)
"WHEEL OF REMORSE"
Community (2009)
"Is she single? What are her likes and dislikes?"
Community (2009)
"I asked her to be my date for the fair, and she said yes."
Community (2009)
"Check out these condoms."
Community (2009)
"Exclamation point, my idea."
Community (2009)
"I can't believe you beat me again!"
Community (2009)
"I can see through the door."
Community (2009)
"I had it wrong!"
Community (2009)
"You know, Doreen speaks six languages."
Community (2009)
"Honey, you're boring the crap out of Jeff."
Community (2009)
"Before I buy dinner, I have to ask..."
Community (2009)
"But it will cost you 200 bucks."
Community (2009)
"A 597?"
Community (2009)
"I don't see what the big deal is. Annie needed to look at the pe..."
Community (2009)
"Everyone should say penis"
Community (2009)
"Yikers."
Community (2009)
"You know..."
Community (2009)
"- This is your car. - Keep it."
Community (2009)
"I booked a sketch artist, an improve troupe,"
Community (2009)
"there'll be a laser projecting a burning pelvis onto the ceiling."
Community (2009)
"This isn't gonna be your mom sexually transmitted disease awareness fair."
Community (2009)
"You've been quite the little helper."
Community (2009)
"STD fair, guys. Catch knowledge."
Community (2009)
"You think you're better?"
Community (2009)
"- I'll stick to sports. - I'm trying to reduce my pop-cultural."
Community (2009)
"You're not moving into sports."
Community (2009)
"- Sounds fun. - No, it doesn't!"
Community (2009)
"And it won't be."
Community (2009)
"- Catch knowledge. - Sorry, not interested..."
Community (2009)
"In ignoring your very important cause."
Community (2009)
"Hi, I'm Jeff Winger."
Community (2009)
"Sabrina is my new secretary."
Community (2009)
""Secretary" is a little degrading to women."
Community (2009)
"My casual friend and I are gonna have a non-romantic breakfast"
Community (2009)
"- if you'd like to join us. - The cafeteria's closed ."
Community (2009)
"- Fortune cookie? - Isn't it great?"
Community (2009)
"Greendale is the latest campus to catch a case"
Community (2009)
"of public health fever!"
Community (2009)
"You know the toilets in the women's bathrooms don't have seats?"
Community (2009)
"Because they keep getting stolen. Sabrina, take a note."
Community (2009)
"I want hidden cameras in every stall."
Community (2009)
"Problem solved."
Community (2009)
"- "You will get aids." - Flip it over."
Community (2009)
"- "Unless you go to the STD fair." - I wrote that."
Community (2009)
"See you later. Catch knowledge."
Community (2009)
"We are friends?"
Community (2009)
"You may have noticed a recent change in my..."
Community (2009)
"- demeanor. - No."
Community (2009)
"Well, I have a new girlfriend."
Community (2009)
"And she is super smart, if you know what I mean."
Community (2009)
"When you catch a big fish,"
Community (2009)
"you want to stuff her and put her on the mantle."
Community (2009)
"- How'bout tonight? - I doubt it."
Community (2009)
"- We played basketball. It was fun. - Don't gloat."
Community (2009)
"It's impossible to guard you."
Community (2009)
"Your eyes are too gentle and mysterious."
Community (2009)
"Jeff and I are double-dating tonight with my new girlfriend."
Community (2009)
"- You got that from "I doubt it"? - Pierce has got a girlfriend!"
Community (2009)
"Some mysteries solve themselves, no?"
Community (2009)
"That's just her profession. She doesn't escort me."
Community (2009)
"I met her in my marketing class."
Community (2009)
"You mean the STD fair. Catch knowledge."
Community (2009)
"Taking a call girl to an STD fair."
Community (2009)
"Is there a pill that makes the word "no" clearer?"
Community (2009)
"it is pretty short notice. Probably couldn't get a date anyway."
Community (2009)
"I'm sure you're right."
Community (2009)
"Maybe it has something to do with crabs. They're like a food, but also a disease."
Community (2009)
"You know, I wonder, for all your feather flashing,"
Community (2009)
"when was the last time you actually scored?"
Community (2009)
"I don't know the precise date,"
Community (2009)
"'cause I'm not you, so there's no receipt."
Community (2009)
"Come on."
Community (2009)
"You shouldn't take potshots at some poor woman 'cause you can't get a date."
Community (2009)
"I can get dates anytime I want."
Community (2009)
"- What is this, some kind of joke? - No. This is."
Community (2009)
""Don't eat the crab dip.""
Community (2009)
""no! Stop being so aware of us!""
Community (2009)
"And it's all thanks to you."
Community (2009)
"I was voted most likely to succeed at my rehab clinic."
Community (2009)
"Well, in recognition of all your hard work,"
Community (2009)
"I have decided that you should conduct"
Community (2009)
"the condom demonstration."
Community (2009)
"how to put a condom on a,"
Community (2009)
"what my dad called a Jimmy Carter."
Community (2009)
"- Am I the right person for that? - Don't worry, not a real one."
Community (2009)
"No, it's an anatomically correct model, you know."
Community (2009)
"But trust me, eyes closed, you can't tell the difference."
Community (2009)
"It's Jeff Winger."
Community (2009)
"What kind of a question is that? Of course I know."
Community (2009)
"Well, if I answer now,"
Community (2009)
"you'll never learn a valuable lesson about trust,"
Community (2009)
"Pierce really got to you, huh?"
Community (2009)
"It has been a dry spell."
Community (2009)
"- I'm trying. - I can see that."
Community (2009)
"This is a lot of outgoing calls."
Community (2009)
""Car wash redhead. Tube top, REM Concert."
Community (2009)
"Juror number six." That sounds aboveboard."
Community (2009)
"- At least you have "mommy" in here. - It's not my mom."
Community (2009)
"Dude, not cool."
Community (2009)
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