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Clips from Broad City (2014) - Co-Op (S03E03)

"This month's churron flavor is anise,"
Broad City (2014)
"but there is a limit to three churrons per customer,"
Broad City (2014)
"You know, I'm not even a huge macaroon girl,"
Broad City (2014)
"but the combination of..."
Broad City (2014)
"Too early."
Broad City (2014)
"I'm being nice."
Broad City (2014)
"Your total is 28.45."
Broad City (2014)
"Here's my co-op card."
Broad City (2014)
"you can complete your shifts for this moon cycle."
Broad City (2014)
"Um, I really can't today."
Broad City (2014)
"Yeah?"
Broad City (2014)
"And I have a really intense doctor's appointment in Long Island."
Broad City (2014)
"There's something more important in Long Island than organic produce?"
Broad City (2014)
"For the privilege of membership,"
Broad City (2014)
"I am feeling this."
Broad City (2014)
"I can have this... procedure."
Broad City (2014)
"Well, either you complete your shifts today"
Broad City (2014)
"or you're banished from the co-op for the rest of your body's life."
Broad City (2014)
"Your choice."
Broad City (2014)
"Ugh, gorgeous, come on."
Broad City (2014)
"- Wow, how 'dat? - So worth it."
Broad City (2014)
"You just made my day. Do you want one of these churrons?"
Broad City (2014)
"- Sure. - Thanks so much."
Broad City (2014)
"- I would have eaten that. - Okay, so down to biz. Business."
Broad City (2014)
"Uh, yeah, your meals have given me like the healthiest shits of my life."
Broad City (2014)
"It's like, dump out, flawless,"
Broad City (2014)
"So, I haven't worked any hours yet, and I need to do them today."
Broad City (2014)
"Dude, I just said you're going to the doctor."
Broad City (2014)
"Oh! Almost forgot."
Broad City (2014)
"- Oh, yes, Gaga. - Yes."
Broad City (2014)
"So obviously, the three of us can't lose my membership,"
Broad City (2014)
"- so I need you to cover my shift. - I can cover for you."
Broad City (2014)
"How's that gonna work?"
Broad City (2014)
"Well, no one knows me there yet."
Broad City (2014)
"But I need you to make the right first impression"
Broad City (2014)
"so that when I do work, no one will know the difference."
Broad City (2014)
"Not literally in my shoes, 'cause I'm a size five and..."
Broad City (2014)
"Yeah, I understand."
Broad City (2014)
"Okay. I'm gonna just end it there."
Broad City (2014)
"Squished 11!"
Broad City (2014)
"Smell... smell a duke!"
Broad City (2014)
"Rape culture sucks!"
Broad City (2014)
"Lincoln, hey, woo!"
Broad City (2014)
"My Lincoln Towncar."
Broad City (2014)
"But this is a... A Prius, right?"
Broad City (2014)
"And I'm gonna drive around town in my car."
Broad City (2014)
"About something else."
Broad City (2014)
"Organic fruit leather and some Tuscan nut mix."
Broad City (2014)
"I'm not really that hungry, though."
Broad City (2014)
"I never understand when people say that,"
Broad City (2014)
"but I anticipated it."
Broad City (2014)
"That's why I had Jaimé make you a... ginger blunt man!"
Broad City (2014)
"Oh, my God! With real honey!"
Broad City (2014)
"While I thought an extraordinary blunt would probably do the trick,"
Broad City (2014)
"I knew I had to take it to the next level."
Broad City (2014)
"- Uh... kyuh. - Great."
Broad City (2014)
"She's a kween."
Broad City (2014)
"And we queens, we cannot be in the back of the bus,"
Broad City (2014)
"♪ Only you ♪"
Broad City (2014)
"I mean... kyuh."
Broad City (2014)
"Since when do you bite your nails?"
Broad City (2014)
"I didn't even notice. I do it when I'm nervous."
Broad City (2014)
"I need to be swaddled!"
Broad City (2014)
"Come on, if you're not gonna swaddle me,"
Broad City (2014)
"at least let me drive and give me road head."
Broad City (2014)
"Well, do you want to die and how does that even work?"
Broad City (2014)
"Just quit the pillow talk and get me off!"
Broad City (2014)
"I'm driving!"
Broad City (2014)
"Sexuality is on a spectrum."
Broad City (2014)
""Shweet" ink."
Broad City (2014)
"Thanks, it's inspired by a Bukowski poem."
Broad City (2014)
"I'm an artist."
Broad City (2014)
"I mean, not that I pay the bills with it."
Broad City (2014)
"That is amazing, me..."
Broad City (2014)
"Oh, cool, what's she make?"
Broad City (2014)
"She sends it to me."
Broad City (2014)
"doing, like, office jobs."
Broad City (2014)
"- Really? - Yeah."
Broad City (2014)
"Yeah. I mean, I knew you would."
Broad City (2014)
"So anyway, where did Abbi go to art school?"
Broad City (2014)
"- No, no, no, no, no! - Ilana."
Broad City (2014)
"- No, no, no, no, no, no, no! - Ilana. Ilana!"
Broad City (2014)
"You have to have all three shots for the HPV vaccine to even work."
Broad City (2014)
"I love my HPV."
Broad City (2014)
"I heard your parents are getting a divorce."
Broad City (2014)
"What? Oh, fuck!"
Broad City (2014)
"So, um, you're all done."
Broad City (2014)
"Red."
Broad City (2014)
"- Thank you. - Oh, one more thing."
Broad City (2014)
"Can you turn over, please?"
Broad City (2014)
"Oh, please, thank your mom for that Coach bag she got me."
Broad City (2014)
"I cannot tell you how many compliments I get on it."
Broad City (2014)
"You're kidding."
Broad City (2014)
"Mm-hmm."
Broad City (2014)
"Abbi's just incredibly bold and dynamic."
Broad City (2014)
"selling mushroom chocolates."
Broad City (2014)
"No way, I was a Phish head."
Broad City (2014)
"Run like an antelope outta control."
Broad City (2014)
"Yeah, yeah!"
Broad City (2014)
"This is hard."
Broad City (2014)
"- Not bad. - Not bad."
Broad City (2014)
"I know we just met, so..."
Broad City (2014)
"I hope this doesn't seem too forward,"
Broad City (2014)
"She seems really, really cool."
Broad City (2014)
"I would love to go out."
Broad City (2014)
"Wait, uh, I was talking about your friend."
Broad City (2014)
"Both get, like, super wet, downtown!"
Broad City (2014)
"Down twat!"
Broad City (2014)
"Fuck!"
Broad City (2014)
"Ugh!"
Broad City (2014)
"Then you had sex doggy style, and who finished first?"
Broad City (2014)
"She did?"
Broad City (2014)
"That is so fucking hot!"
Broad City (2014)
"Thank you so much for telling me that, woo!"
Broad City (2014)
"- We are poly, we are bi. - I'm not bi."
Broad City (2014)
"You're right, how do I know if I haven't truly tested my boundaries?"
Broad City (2014)
"What if we tricked her into having a threesome?"
Broad City (2014)
"but when you say it, I really hear it."
Broad City (2014)
"So, wait. All porn is kiddie porn?"
Broad City (2014)
"She went slow but really tight squeeze..."
Broad City (2014)
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