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Clips from The Simpsons - The Wettest Stories Ever Told (S17E17)

"Lord, we thank you for the many ways you show your love:"
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"and your hilarious idea to surround us with water"
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"that would kill us if we drank it."
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"Now I got to warn you."
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"Even for this day and age, I'm considered a bad husband."
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"She's going to marry him 'cause he wears boots instead of blackening his"
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"feet."
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"Don't stop."
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"You're choking him just the way his father used to."
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"Good times."
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"Perhaps thou wouldst make a good father."
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"May I escort you to the railing?"
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"If I don't do something, soon they'll be exchanging pleasantries."
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"Man! That guy sends my humors from sanguine to bilious!"
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"That's how we talk. Weird?"
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"Anyways, I just wanted to let you know that I'm throwing"
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"Stop calling it that!"
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"I was saving this booze to mess up the indians,"
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"You're good at this."
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"This storm's blowing us off course."
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"And where's our crew?"
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"I'll show you where they are."
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"Sin, sin, sin!"
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"Horseplay? Roughhousing?"
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"And here's the knave what's responsible."
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"That's all I needed to hear."
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"Homer, I can't believe I was thinking of letting you"
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"touch my elbow through a cloth."
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"But, baby, a man has needs."
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"I keep telling you the ability to add"
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"two-digit numbers is not witchcraft."
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"31 + 43?"
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"Witch, witch, witch!"
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"People, this is madness!"
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"We can burn the witch later."
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"But first, who's going to help me pee?"
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"Don't worry, Marge."
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"to take over all America by the 21st century."
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"Man, that bird did it all."
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"Good guy."
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"I just thought of a name for where we're going."
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"New England."
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"That's real creative."
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"Land ho!"
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"Who wants whipped topping?"
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"Here's your bill."
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"And will there be anything else?"
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"We haven't gotten our food yet."
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"Who else has a story?"
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"I do."
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"Homer, you can tell the third story."
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"Bart will tell the second, which is usually the weakest."
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"I'm just trying to take the pressure off of you."
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"Well, one time I read this boring comic book"
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""Bligh... eats... dolphin... boogers.""
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"there's bound to be a booger or two in the mix."
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"Today's announcements:"
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"First of all, in an effort to save water,"
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"And because of a drawing of myself having romantic congress with a merman..."
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"And I can assure you there were cookies in there."
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"I'm getting pretty tired of that seawad."
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"This is nothing like the recruiting brochure."
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"Maybe that's what happens on the last day."
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"I warn you, captain:"
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"Push this crew too far and there'll be mutiny."
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"Mutiny? On the bounty?"
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"Opium."
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"And remember: What happens in Tahiti stays in Tahiti."
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"I'm telling you, I don't look like that."
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"Make another."
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"...And I want to feel it too on an island in the sun..."
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"Thanks for staying with us."
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"We appreciate you putting cloth over our women's' boobies."
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"Bye-bye."
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"I wish we were back on Tahiti."
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"Why, yes, it was truly an unforgettable vacation."
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"in a round."
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"row, row, row your boat gently down the stream"
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"Make that song your own."
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"You don't sound like you've ever been on a boat in your life."
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"Captain, this is a mutiny."
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"Let's not be hasty there."
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"We have a suggestion box."
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"You made it from the head of the last guy who had a suggestion."
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"Yeah, but... I... I..."
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"I warned you there'd be mutiny."
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"And sing a round while you do."
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"Row, row, row your boat gently"
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"row, row, merrily, merrily, bound the down gently down the..."
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"merrily down the..."
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"I'm only one man."
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"You'll sing or you'll mutiny."
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"And you're too much of a spineless coward for that."
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"This is your new captain saying, "next stop: Tahiti.""
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"And we're going to remove all evidence of"
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"the most beautiful women in the world."
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"Well, look at it this way:"
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"We're going to discover the North Pole."
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"Yeah."
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"I'll be fetching your food right away."
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"when madness and ignorance ruled:"
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"The 1970s."
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"the ship's doctor has reported an outbreak of..."
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"Disco fever!"
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"The only cure is to do a little dance, make a little love..."
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"get down tonight."
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"Wait a minute."
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"And now let's welcome the Leroy Neiman of Seamen,"
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"your captain, Montgomery Burns."
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"I'm Chevy Chase and you're not."
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"Willy Stargell!"
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"Yes, welcome to the maiden voyage of the neptune,"
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"Help yourselves to some pineapple upside-down cake and apple turnovers."
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"so make sure to give us your cap size!"
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"What a fascinating cross-section of humanity."
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"hello, angels."
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"Your mission today involves going undercover at a wet t-shirt contest."
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"Just get you wet..."
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"And you've got the elderly"
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"jewish couple making their first trip to Israel."
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