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Clips from Louie (2010) - Bully (S01E01)

"Without me? Heh, heh, heh. Sure."
Louie (2010)
"I don't really need you."
Louie (2010)
"They're great company. Mm-hm."
Louie (2010)
"It's nice, though."
Louie (2010)
"To share? Yeah."
Louie (2010)
"You were correct. This is like piss."
Louie (2010)
"It's piss with shit floating in it. It's fantastic."
Louie (2010)
"So how did you get started being a comedian?"
Louie (2010)
"Oh, well, I started in high school."
Louie (2010)
"Really? Yeah, I was 18."
Louie (2010)
"- Suzy. Suzy. - Big old titties."
Louie (2010)
"I found out you could do open-mike nights in Boston..."
Louie (2010)
"...so I started getting interested."
Louie (2010)
"You guys can-- Sorry."
Louie (2010)
"Dude, this one right here-- You believe these guys?"
Louie (2010)
"You had that Asian chick in front of you. - Loser, man."
Louie (2010)
"Eat my ass, you douche bag."
Louie (2010)
"Eat, eat, eat!"
Louie (2010)
"- Eat. Eat it. - Eat, eat, eat!"
Louie (2010)
"That nobody can even talk. - I know."
Louie (2010)
"Ridiculous."
Louie (2010)
"I really am interested you started so young."
Louie (2010)
"You are? Yeah."
Louie (2010)
"Hey. Hey! Guys, could you keep it down, please?"
Louie (2010)
"Thank you."
Louie (2010)
"There were clubs in Boston you could go on..."
Louie (2010)
"...they're open-mike nights."
Louie (2010)
"You could just-- Anytime you wanted to."
Louie (2010)
"How's it going?"
Louie (2010)
"Fine."
Louie (2010)
"I'm sorry, were we bothering you guys back there?"
Louie (2010)
"Yeah, actually, you were."
Louie (2010)
"That's why I asked you to be quiet..."
Louie (2010)
"...and you did, so thank you."
Louie (2010)
"I'm Sean."
Louie (2010)
"No, it's Louie."
Louie (2010)
"Oh, okay, Louie."
Louie (2010)
"Louie. Heh, heh, heh."
Louie (2010)
"Hi, I'm Sean."
Louie (2010)
"What's your name?"
Louie (2010)
"Heh, heh. Am I bothering you?"
Louie (2010)
"What's up, Louie? Why don't you go back with your friends?"
Louie (2010)
"Yeah, see, I don't really feel like it, Louie."
Louie (2010)
"Hey, Louie, can I ask you a question?"
Louie (2010)
"When was the last time you got your ass kicked?"
Louie (2010)
"What? You heard me."
Louie (2010)
"What, you scared?"
Louie (2010)
"Are you scared right now?"
Louie (2010)
"No, I'm not scared of you. Why?"
Louie (2010)
"Because I'm a grown man."
Louie (2010)
"You're not afraid of high school. No."
Louie (2010)
"What would you do then?"
Louie (2010)
"Huh?"
Louie (2010)
"Do you want that?"
Louie (2010)
"I'm serious."
Louie (2010)
"I can hurt you really bad."
Louie (2010)
"Right now."
Louie (2010)
"You see this? Huh? You see that?"
Louie (2010)
"Just left him there bleeding."
Louie (2010)
"Probably sent him to the hospital, I don't know."
Louie (2010)
"Are you ready for that?"
Louie (2010)
"I'm feeling like doing that to you now. I'm gonna be honest."
Louie (2010)
"I'm kind of leaning that way."
Louie (2010)
"I don't know, I don't know. Maybe if you ask me nicely or something, I won't do it."
Louie (2010)
"But then again, I don't know. I don't know how I'll feel, you know?"
Louie (2010)
"I don't know how I'll feel because maybe you'll ask me nicely..."
Louie (2010)
"...and I'll still beat the shit out of you. Heh, heh."
Louie (2010)
"Maybe I won't."
Louie (2010)
"So, what do you say, Louie?"
Louie (2010)
"Huh?"
Louie (2010)
"Please don't. What do you want me to--?"
Louie (2010)
"Don't what?"
Louie (2010)
"Don't kick my ass, okay?"
Louie (2010)
"No, I don't like how you said that."
Louie (2010)
"Why? What--? Ask nice, ask better. It was fake."
Louie (2010)
"Ask again. Now."
Louie (2010)
"Okay."
Louie (2010)
"Please don't kick my ass, okay?"
Louie (2010)
"You're very strong and young, I get it."
Louie (2010)
"You could kick my ass, I'm sure you could, so I'm really asking you nicely..."
Louie (2010)
"...to please not kick my ass, okay?"
Louie (2010)
"That was hard to watch. All right, Louie."
Louie (2010)
"Come on, guys, let's go."
Louie (2010)
"Let's leave Louie to his date."
Louie (2010)
"Let's let him have his nice little date."
Louie (2010)
"- Good luck, Louie. - Take care, tough guy."
Louie (2010)
"That guy was a nightmare, huh?"
Louie (2010)
"What?"
Louie (2010)
"Nothing."
Louie (2010)
"You didn't want me to fight that guy, did you?"
Louie (2010)
"Because he-- That guy was pretty serious. No, no, no. Yeah. No, of course."
Louie (2010)
"Hey, look, if you need to be with some guy that gets into fights with young jocks...."
Louie (2010)
"You did the right thing. I mean, of course, no. Of course not."
Louie (2010)
"I mean, that was-- It was pretty humiliating. Yeah."
Louie (2010)
"Hey, look, I don't-- I'm getting this weird feeling..."
Louie (2010)
"...you're looking down at me for what happened."
Louie (2010)
"I don't-- I mean, I would never want a guy to fight."
Louie (2010)
"And, you know, being violent is just the dumbest thing ever."
Louie (2010)
"And who cares what you have to say to get the guy off your back."
Louie (2010)
"I totally feel that way."
Louie (2010)
"I mean, if I'm being totally honest, that was a turnoff, seeing that."
Louie (2010)
"Jesus Christ. I know. I'm sorry, I can't help it."
Louie (2010)
"I don't know. I just-- It's like a primitive thing or something."
Louie (2010)
"I mean, you see this guy just totally debase himself and it's--"
Louie (2010)
"Just to be safe?"
Louie (2010)
"It's a turnoff."
Louie (2010)
"That's seriously a real bummer."
Louie (2010)
"You know, I gotta criticize you a little bit for that..."
Louie (2010)
"...because that's why there's wars and stuff, you know?"
Louie (2010)
"Women like you that choose stupid strong people..."
Louie (2010)
"...over the weak and the gentle-- Listen, look."
Louie (2010)
"Okay, I'm a grown woman."
Louie (2010)
"But my chemistry is telling me that you're a loser."
Louie (2010)
"I mean, I'm surprised by my own reaction... Yeah."
Louie (2010)
"Wow. ...but I have no defense."
Louie (2010)
"I mean, I'm completely surprised by my own feelings about it."
Louie (2010)
"I'm sorry. Okay. Okay?"
Louie (2010)
"So let's put you in a cab now. Should I leave tip or something?"
Louie (2010)
"I got it. Okay, yeah."
Louie (2010)
"It was a great doughnut, though. Yeah, thank you very much."
Louie (2010)
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