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Clips from Louie (2010) - Bully (S01E01)

"Louie, Louie, you're gonna cry"
Louie (2010)
"Louie, Louie, Louie, Louie"
Louie (2010)
"There is a secret to it."
Louie (2010)
"But withdraw again."
Louie (2010)
"And...."
Louie (2010)
"...so you just touch her, and then she explodes."
Louie (2010)
"When intercourse occurs..."
Louie (2010)
"I didn't understand anything that they taught us."
Louie (2010)
"It's kind of late, but I don't know, maybe get drink or something?"
Louie (2010)
"Yeah, I gotta work tomorrow..."
Louie (2010)
"I mean, I'm here every night. Seriously?"
Louie (2010)
"The doughnuts."
Louie (2010)
"You're a loser. Loser."
Louie (2010)
"Well, yeah, I was in high school-- - Eat, eat, eat!"
Louie (2010)
"Sean. Got it, thanks. "Got it, thanks," that's your name?"
Louie (2010)
"Hey, come on."
Louie (2010)
"When was the last time you got your ass kicked? Just curious."
Louie (2010)
"So, what if I decided to kick your ass right now?"
Louie (2010)
"It's just two days ago. Destroyed this guy's face."
Louie (2010)
"Must have hit him like 40 times. Teeth were all over the place."
Louie (2010)
"Louie!"
Louie (2010)
"What?"
Louie (2010)
"I got two kids, I'm not-- No. No, I would never."
Louie (2010)
"That's-- Of course, it's so stupid. I'd be pissed if you did."
Louie (2010)
"But.... What?"
Louie (2010)
"I just-- I don't know."
Louie (2010)
"And my mind is telling me that you are a great guy."
Louie (2010)
"I think you said enough things."
Louie (2010)
"No, no. Who's this?"
Louie (2010)
"I'm 42. I got children."
Louie (2010)
"Sean! Get down here! - What? Oh, man."
Louie (2010)
"What the hell? What are you doing here? - What did you do?"
Louie (2010)
"He's 18 now, you know."
Louie (2010)
"I don't know what to do."
Louie (2010)
"I've never beat anybody up, I've never sucked a guy's dick."
Louie (2010)
"Those are two things I never did..."
Louie (2010)
"Louie, Louie, Louie, Louie"
Louie (2010)
"Louie, Louie, Louie, Louie"
Louie (2010)
"Louie, Louie, Louie, Lou-ah"
Louie (2010)
"Louie, Louie, you're gonna die"
Louie (2010)
"Louie, Louie, Louie, Louie"
Louie (2010)
"Yeah, I remember learning about sex when I was a kid."
Louie (2010)
"I wanted to know what sex was because I just had boners all the time."
Louie (2010)
"I went to my dad. I asked my dad what sex was."
Louie (2010)
"So I asked my dad and he told me. Here's what my dad said."
Louie (2010)
"First of all, it is not sex."
Louie (2010)
"You must not call it that."
Louie (2010)
"Then what do I call it?"
Louie (2010)
"Making love."
Louie (2010)
"And I am going to tell it to you now."
Louie (2010)
"You must withhold stimulation."
Louie (2010)
"Enter her only slightly, then withdraw."
Louie (2010)
"And wait until she is mad with desire, begging you to penetrate."
Louie (2010)
"Then:"
Louie (2010)
"Then a bit more."
Louie (2010)
"Then you must wait and withhold until she demands it..."
Louie (2010)
"...and even then, you give her nothing."
Louie (2010)
"Then all you have to do is touch her and she will explode."
Louie (2010)
"I was 7 years old, let me explain that. I was 7 years old."
Louie (2010)
"He's telling me how to make, like, a 35-year-old woman come..."
Louie (2010)
"...who, like, really knows herself."
Louie (2010)
"Now, that, my son, is the art of making love."
Louie (2010)
"Now repeat it to me."
Louie (2010)
"Well..."
Louie (2010)
"...first of all, you said that you don't call it sex, it's making love."
Louie (2010)
"And when you're doing it, first you go in just a little bit..."
Louie (2010)
"...and then you come back out and then she wants more..."
Louie (2010)
"...so you go in a little more."
Louie (2010)
"And then you come back out, then she demands it..."
Louie (2010)
"So they taught us sex in school."
Louie (2010)
"And all they did was scare the shit out of me."
Louie (2010)
"Because they show you these diagrams of, like, a penis..."
Louie (2010)
"...just this huge penis and it's cut in half lengthwise."
Louie (2010)
""That's what your dick would look like if I ripped off half of it..."
Louie (2010)
"...and threw it in the garbage.""
Louie (2010)
"And this is the vagina."
Louie (2010)
"Vagina."
Louie (2010)
"...the man takes his penis and ejaculates into the vagina."
Louie (2010)
"It just scared me because I thought-- Like, I was a bad student."
Louie (2010)
"I had a hard time focusing on what they were telling me..."
Louie (2010)
"...about all these tubes and shit."
Louie (2010)
"Louie."
Louie (2010)
"Louie, come up here and show me."
Louie (2010)
"Louie, show me the penis."
Louie (2010)
"Show everyone the penis, Louie."
Louie (2010)
"Show the class the penis."
Louie (2010)
"I thought for, like, five years that when-- From watching this whole thing."
Louie (2010)
"That when you have sex, you come and one of your balls comes out."
Louie (2010)
"That's what I thought happens, that you have to come a ball..."
Louie (2010)
"That's what I thought, you just, "Blah!" And you push a ball out..."
Louie (2010)
"...and she's screaming and there's blood everywhere."
Louie (2010)
"And you can only do it twice and then you're out of balls. That's what I thought."
Louie (2010)
"You come twice and have two babies..."
Louie (2010)
"...and then you just walk around with an empty sack for the rest of your life."
Louie (2010)
"Which turned out to be true, but...."
Louie (2010)
"Could've been worse. Yeah, totally."
Louie (2010)
"No, that was really good."
Louie (2010)
"You liked that? Yeah."
Louie (2010)
"I'm glad you liked it."
Louie (2010)
"Yeah, you seem to know all the good places in New York."
Louie (2010)
"Well, I've been alive for a while and I like to eat, so...."
Louie (2010)
"So I don't know if you want to-- Yeah, I--"
Louie (2010)
"Um.... What time is it?"
Louie (2010)
"...and I don't really wanna start drinking now."
Louie (2010)
"I don't really drink either, so...."
Louie (2010)
"You know what? There's a doughnut place on 14th Street."
Louie (2010)
"You wanna get doughnuts right now?"
Louie (2010)
"Well, it's just kind of a great old place."
Louie (2010)
"You know, just watery coffee."
Louie (2010)
"It's one of the last shitty old places in New York..."
Louie (2010)
"...and I don't know, I think you'd like it."
Louie (2010)
"And probably I'll get a doughnut too. Maybe some doughnuts."
Louie (2010)
"Hey, you wanna go?"
Louie (2010)
"Come on, watch me eat a doughnut."
Louie (2010)
"Heh. Okay. It'll be fun."
Louie (2010)
"You wanna go? Yeah."
Louie (2010)
"Come on. If I can have a doughnut too."
Louie (2010)
"Well, you can have maybe one."
Louie (2010)
"I would have come here even if you didn't come with me."
Louie (2010)
"All by yourself? Oh, yeah."
Louie (2010)
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