Loading...
You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.

Clips from Seinfeld - The Chronicle (S09E09)

"-She's bald? -She's bald!"
Seinfeld
"He's a bad breaker-upper."
Seinfeld
"-She's too tan. -She's too good."
Seinfeld
"It's irresistible."
Seinfeld
"How could I do this?"
Seinfeld
"How can I move back in with those people? Tell me."
Seinfeld
"They're insane. You know that."
Seinfeld
"Hey, my parents are just as crazy as yours."
Seinfeld
"-Get out of here. -You're not paying."
Seinfeld
"Now, Jerry, please do not do this to your father."
Seinfeld
"I can't get it open."
Seinfeld
"How can you compare your parents to my parents?"
Seinfeld
"I told everybody about it. Everybody knows."
Seinfeld
"... George is dead, call me back."
Seinfeld
"You're a separatÈe."
Seinfeld
"-I am too. -You're not out there."
Seinfeld
"You can't be, because I am out there. And if I see you out there..."
Seinfeld
"...there's not enough voltage in this world..."
Seinfeld
"...to electroshock me back into coherence."
Seinfeld
"This is delicious, Mrs. Ross."
Seinfeld
"Let me understand."
Seinfeld
"You got the hen, the chicken and the rooster."
Seinfeld
"The rooster goes with the chicken."
Seinfeld
"So who's having sex with the hen?"
Seinfeld
"You only hear of a hen, a rooster and a chicken."
Seinfeld
"-Something's missing. -Something's missing, all right."
Seinfeld
"That's perverse."
Seinfeld
"...please enter the first three letters of the movie title now."
Seinfeld
"You've selected Agent Zero."
Seinfeld
"What?"
Seinfeld
"-How do you know? -She reads lips."
Seinfeld
"Oh, my God."
Seinfeld
"She could come to the party tomorrow and read Gwen's lips for me."
Seinfeld
"...and she tells me what Gwen is saying about me."
Seinfeld
"I'm not sure about this."
Seinfeld
"-lf she says no, case closed. -All right."
Seinfeld
"Laura, George was wondering--"
Seinfeld
"Sure. I'll do it."
Seinfeld
"Hey, there."
Seinfeld
"-What is that? Is that lima bean? -Yes."
Seinfeld
"...you look exactly like Al Pacino?"
Seinfeld
"You know, Scent of a Woman."
Seinfeld
"Kramer, I've been reviewing your work."
Seinfeld
"Quite frankly, it stinks."
Seinfeld
"I mean, you know, I'll work harder."
Seinfeld
"Nights, weekends, whatever it takes."
Seinfeld
"Well, I'm just trying to get ahead."
Seinfeld
"I will never understand people."
Seinfeld
"The jar is round."
Seinfeld
"They should call it Roundtine."
Seinfeld
"Stop."
Seinfeld
"Well, you ladies look lovely tonight."
Seinfeld
"When's the last time you looked in the mirror? You're an Adonis."
Seinfeld
"I won't have you turning my office into a den of iniquity."
Seinfeld
"-Get your fix somewhere else! -Hey! Hey!"
Seinfeld
"...for more than 1 0 seconds, you should hang onto her like grim death."
Seinfeld
"Why not? I'm Jewish, remember?"
Seinfeld
"-I know, but-- -Jerry."
Seinfeld
"It's our sense of humor that sustained us as a people for 3000 years."
Seinfeld
"Believe me, I have ridden in a Cadillac hundreds of times."
Seinfeld
"Where did you get that balm, anyway?"
Seinfeld
"-The Maestro. -The who?"
Seinfeld
"Tonight you in for a real treat."
Seinfeld
"Hey, Cedric, Bob. This guy won't wear a ribbon."
Seinfeld
"Perhaps there's more to Newman than meets the eye."
Seinfeld
"No, there's less."
Seinfeld
"Hello, Newman."
Seinfeld
"But you remember this."
Seinfeld
"When you control the mail, you control information."
Seinfeld
"Believe it or not, George isn't at home"
Seinfeld
"Please leave a message At the beep"
Seinfeld
"It's funny, George."
Seinfeld
"...until a person like you comes along and articulates it so perfectly."
Seinfeld
"What?"
Seinfeld
"-Live. -Oh, right, right, right, right, right."
Seinfeld
"No. No. No. No. No."
Seinfeld
"All right. All right. All right!"
Seinfeld
"-George. -Jerry, Stacy."
Seinfeld
"-Jerry. -George, Stacy."
Seinfeld
"-George. -Jerry."
Seinfeld
"Marla. Stacy."
Seinfeld
"-Elaine. -George."
Seinfeld
"-Newman. -Jerry."
Seinfeld
"Done."
Seinfeld
"But I will tell you this. I am going over to her apartment..."
Seinfeld
"...and I'm telling her to put those shades down."
Seinfeld
"I can't sleep, I can't leave the house. I'm climbing the walls."
Seinfeld
"He took it out."
Seinfeld
"He what?"
Seinfeld
"...it out."
Seinfeld
"What are you doing to yourself?"
Seinfeld
"What? You can't keep this up."
Seinfeld
"Every time you shave it, it's gonna come in thicker and fuller and darker."
Seinfeld
"Oh, that's an old wives' tale."
Seinfeld
"Is it? Look at this."
Seinfeld
"Could it be because you don't want him to know..."
Seinfeld
"...you have a friend who pees in the shower?"
Seinfeld
"-That's exactly what it is! -Why couldn't you wait?"
Seinfeld
"Since when is a drain a toilet?"
Seinfeld
"It's all pipes! What's the difference?"
Seinfeld
"I'll call a plumber right now!"
Seinfeld
"Could we just drop all the pee-pipe stuff here?"
Seinfeld
"What is that?"
Seinfeld
"I think it's the horse."
Seinfeld
"Hey, how's everything? You need anything?"
Seinfeld
"I can't-- I can't take this."
Seinfeld
"We can't breathe back here."
Seinfeld
"Rusty!"
Seinfeld
"Rusty!"
Seinfeld
"-How is it a write-off? -They just write it off."
Seinfeld
"You don't even know what a write-off is."
Seinfeld
"-Do you? -No, I don't."
Seinfeld
"I like sports. I could do something in sports."
Seinfeld
"In what capacity?"
Seinfeld
"Well, it doesn't even have to be the general manager."
Seinfeld
"Maybe I could be, like, an announcer. Like a color man."
Seinfeld
"You know how I always make those interesting comments during the game."
Seinfeld
"Well, you know, they tend to give those jobs to ex-ballplayers..."
Seinfeld
"The kissing thing is over. There's no more kissing."
Seinfeld
"Kramer, what the hell is going--?"
Seinfeld
Show more clips