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Clips from Seinfeld - The Chronicle (S09E09)
"Nine years."
Seinfeld
"It seems like every week a whole new set of problems..."
Seinfeld
"Anyway, the point is, over the last nine years--"
Seinfeld
"I'm all itchy back here."
Seinfeld
"-What in God's name are we doing? -What?"
Seinfeld
"What-- What kind of lives are these?"
Seinfeld
"No, we're not. We're not men."
Seinfeld
"I was in the pool!"
Seinfeld
"Since when do you smoke?"
Seinfeld
"I've always smoked."
Seinfeld
"I gave it up for a while, but it was too tough."
Seinfeld
"Well, you are gonna have to quit."
Seinfeld
"That's why I'm different."
Seinfeld
"Are you sensing anything right now?"
Seinfeld
"Mrs. Enright!"
Seinfeld
"You got anything on the horizon?"
Seinfeld
"No."
Seinfeld
"Everybody else got one."
Seinfeld
"All right, here. Here's your Christmas card."
Seinfeld
"Every group has someone that they all make fun of."
Seinfeld
"No, I'm not."
Seinfeld
"I don't like this thing!"
Seinfeld
"And here's what I'm doing with it!"
Seinfeld
"Stella!"
Seinfeld
"-Elaine, you don't like the movie? -I hate it!"
Seinfeld
"Oh, go to hell!"
Seinfeld
"Get it out."
Seinfeld
"Come on. Break it up."
Seinfeld
"Hey, hey!"
Seinfeld
"Kramer goes to a fantasy camp."
Seinfeld
"Do nothing."
Seinfeld
"No boxers, no Jockeys."
Seinfeld
"I am not an anti-dentite."
Seinfeld
"You're a rabid anti-dentite."
Seinfeld
"-They do have their own schools. -Yeah!"
Seinfeld
"Only successful."
Seinfeld
"I have a suspicion that he's converted to Judaism..."
Seinfeld
"Would you be interested in switching over..."
Seinfeld
"Give me your home number and I'll call you later."
Seinfeld
"Jerry. Kill me."
Seinfeld
"Jerry!"
Seinfeld
"Oh, my God."
Seinfeld
"What percentage of people would you say are good-looking?"
Seinfeld
"-You're way off. -Way off?"
Seinfeld
"Undatable!"
Seinfeld
"...when your name rhymes with a part of the female anatomy?"
Seinfeld
"-Are you serious? -Look, Jerry."
Seinfeld
"Sex to save the friendship."
Seinfeld
"Well, if we have to, we have to."
Seinfeld
"What are you doing? You're robbing me?"
Seinfeld
"No, no, no! That's my only suit!"
Seinfeld
"Will I see you again?"
Seinfeld
"Yeah. Yeah, we've been intimate."
Seinfeld
"All right, all right. We do it five times a week."
Seinfeld
"So we're fooling around there, you know."
Seinfeld
"George."
Seinfeld
"Pleasuring you."
Seinfeld
"-So you think you're spongeworthy? -Yes, I think I'm spongeworthy."
Seinfeld
"I eat well. I exercise."
Seinfeld
"-All right, let's go. -Okay."
Seinfeld
"I might tell her that I love her."
Seinfeld
"Well, that's a big move, Georgie boy."
Seinfeld
"Are you confident in the l love you return?"
Seinfeld
"How is it that a man like you..."
Seinfeld
"...so bald and so quirky and funny..."
Seinfeld
"Well, Marisa..."
Seinfeld
"I'm not married. I'm not allowed to go out with somebody else?"
Seinfeld
"-Depends. -Depends on what?"
Seinfeld
"Well, how long you've been seeing her."
Seinfeld
"-Are you on a daily? -No."
Seinfeld
"Do you have to ask her out or is the date implied?"
Seinfeld
"Well, I'll tell you what you got here."
Seinfeld
"-You got yourself a girlfriend. -Oh, no, no, no."
Seinfeld
"Man-made prisons. You're doing time."
Seinfeld
"ls it all right if I use the bathroom now?"
Seinfeld
"And you can forget about watching TV while you're eating."
Seinfeld
"Because it's dinnertime."
Seinfeld
"What's the matter?"
Seinfeld
"You don't think she'd yada, yada sex?"
Seinfeld
"No, I mentioned the bisque."
Seinfeld
"Allison spoke to me..."
Seinfeld
"You didn't have make-up sex? How could you not have make-up sex?"
Seinfeld
"That's the best feature of the heavy relationship."
Seinfeld
"The only sex you're gonna have better than make-up sex..."
Seinfeld
"...is if you're sent to prison and you have a conjugal visit."
Seinfeld
"The worst place in the world."
Seinfeld
"And the heat. My God, the heat."
Seinfeld
"I mean, what do you think about all that?"
Seinfeld
"I am not going to hell."
Seinfeld
"Even though I am not."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, that's right."
Seinfeld
"...then George Costanza as you know him ceases to exist."
Seinfeld
"...he will kill independent George."
Seinfeld
"Would you like some bread, Jerry?"
Seinfeld
"No. No thanks, I'm just not hungry."
Seinfeld
"Then at least drink your beer."
Seinfeld
"You have a little something on your face."
Seinfeld
"-He's a re-gifter. -She's a two-face."
Seinfeld
"She's got the jimmy legs."
Seinfeld
"-She's a virgin. -He's poor."
Seinfeld
"She's got everything I've always wanted in another human being."
Seinfeld
"He's like a Svengali."
Seinfeld
"She just dislikes me so much."
Seinfeld
"-I'm paying. -Dad, I'm paying."
Seinfeld
"Georgie, I'm a divorcÈe."
Seinfeld
"-Well, I'm out there, George. -You're not out there."
Seinfeld
"-We'll talk about it another time. -But you see my point?"
Seinfeld
"They're all chickens."
Seinfeld
"The rooster has sex with all of them."
Seinfeld
"Hello, and welcome to Movie Phone."
Seinfeld
"If you know the name of the movie you'd like to see, press one."
Seinfeld
"Come on, come on."
Seinfeld
"If that's correct, press one."
Seinfeld
"You've selected Brown-Eyed Girl."
Seinfeld
"Why don't you just tell me the name of the movie you selected?"
Seinfeld
"I-- I just had a great idea."
Seinfeld
"We bring her to the party..."
Seinfeld
"She's not a novelty act, George..."
Seinfeld
"Look, it's a skill, just like juggling."
Seinfeld
"She'll probably enjoy showing it off."
Seinfeld
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