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Clips from The Detour - The Trip (S02E02)

"and steal your kids."
The Detour
"I mean, I'm sure they were when they were younger."
The Detour
"- Whoa, whoa. - What?"
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"Guys? Super D?"
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"I can't find them."
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"What the..."
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"What the shit?"
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"It's the evidence."
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"Oh, shit. He was right."
The Detour
"so nobody looks in the toilet."
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"Say goodbye to a formerly great country, kids."
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"No. I said your parents would meet you there."
The Detour
"Because I'm on the no-fly list."
The Detour
"we're a little quick to anger..."
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"A week? 10 days tops."
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"Bring those kids home safe, huh?"
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"a few years ago, but this..."
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"Okay, hold on. Who's 25?"
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"Thanks for these!"
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"So maybe let's have a little perspective."
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"I'd walk past those guys that get to go on first."
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"Lie-flat beds."
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"You know what..."
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"- Use it in a sentence. - Um..."
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"What's stuck?"
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"Here, here. Is this better? Hmm? Hmm?"
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"You got a girlfriend?"
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"It's Jesus. I'm in love with Jesus."
The Detour
"But that's only two and half minutes at this sp..."
The Detour
"No. You are in no condition to drive."
The Detour
"- Hey. Hit me. - What?"
The Detour
"It's going to have to be, like, this big for you to pee in it."
The Detour
"Oh, my God. I can't believe you're doing this."
The Detour
"You spilled it all over my sweatshirt!"
The Detour
"You've got some sort of kidney failure or something."
The Detour
"Why would you think the window was open, honey?"
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"What would you like me to do, okay?"
The Detour
"You didn't enjoy my finger blasting."
The Detour
"God."
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"That would mean this thing only gets six miles a gallon."
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"What was that?"
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"- What's happening? - How would I know?"
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"Before we go down this delightful little rabbit hole,"
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"But either way, sorry. Well, wait, hold on."
The Detour
"You've told me everything? I tell you everything."
The Detour
"- Did you sleep with my sister? - Friends."
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"Did you have sex with my sister?"
The Detour
"Did your penis go inside my sister's vagina?"
The Detour
"- And it smelled. It was bad. - That's not..."
The Detour
"You know what made it worse? I had whiskey dick."
The Detour
"but you pretend like you don't."
The Detour
"Okay, I broke his jaw."
The Detour
"I know, I know. We'll be there soon, okay?"
The Detour
"Nope."
The Detour
"You let a wanted felon waltz back into your life"
The Detour
"How could you let him do that?"
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"I..."
The Detour
"You are terrible parents."
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"We've been told that a few times."
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"Children are your life's blood."
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"They are so precious."
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"Yeah, well, the daughter is a bit on the spectrum."
The Detour
"And their son, I don't know how he functions in life."
The Detour
"I mean, you should have seen him."
The Detour
"He was getting this handy from..."
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"Hey. How do you know that?"
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"In our home?"
The Detour
"Don't doodle. Answer the question."
The Detour
"Did you put a camera in our house?"
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"- It's 9:30. No. - Hey, kids. Come on out here."
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"We've got some stuff to talk to you about."
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"We've got some news. It's not great."
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"Hey."
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"Kids?"
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"What the hell?"
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"Holy shit."
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"Oh, geez!"
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"What are you do... What? What?"
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"Say words with your mouth. Use noise."
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"Bags?"
The Detour
"Oh, bugs?"
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"That's what this... You don't do this!"
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"You call an exterminator."
The Detour
"What is your problem?"
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"Nate, pour children are not at the Lewises'."
The Detour
"Go faster, go faster, go faster. Come on."
The Detour
"Why... I..."
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"Hurry."
The Detour
"People are liste... People are listening?"
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"We've established this. What are you doing."
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"Baby, what are you doing? Stop doing that."
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"Stop eating that."
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"It's too thick."
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"- Who was right? - Oh, my dad."
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"- I hate it when he's right. - Who? What are you talking about?"
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"- My father. - What about him?"
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"- Help me with this. - What?"
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"- Help me get this off. - Oh, bugs in the mattress?"
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"Yep. Yep."
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"Get off."
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"Bugs."
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"What?"
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"Why would you put that in there?"
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"God."
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"No wonder I was getting such a shitty night's sleep."
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"Ah."
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"What are you doing? Oh, my God."
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"- It's not what it looks like. - It looks like"
The Detour
"you're thumbing around in a bowl of human feces."
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"Which, that wasn't me, by the way."
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"The kids must have..."
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"It's all a part of his escape plan."
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"- What kind of plan is that? - Relax."
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"It's a candy bar and chocolate sauce,"
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"It's still disgusting looking."
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"- What is that? - Here."
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"Oh! Oh, my God."
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"- Open it. - Wha... No!"
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"- It's chocolate sauce! - It was still in toilet water!"
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"What is this, airline tickets? What, did he buy us a trip?"
The Detour
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