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Clips from Scrubs - My Deja Vu, My Deja Vu (S05E05)

"[J.D.] Today started off on a high note. Ernie, the homeless guy,"
Scrubs
"- He probably needs a little more juice. - Yes."
Scrubs
"after the accidental death of three of his patients."
Scrubs
"OK, there he is. Just play it cool."
Scrubs
"What is the latest on Mrs. Riley up in 403?"
Scrubs
"OK, here's a bud clearly in need of nipping."
Scrubs
"we do want to make a big deal out of them,"
Scrubs
"Well, sure thing, Perry."
Scrubs
"# Welcome back"
Scrubs
"That's when the background comes in."
Scrubs
"And what better way to get started than with my new 18-wheeler scooter horn?"
Scrubs
"Finally, a shortcut through the mall parking lot,"
Scrubs
"Top that, dude!"
Scrubs
"- Nice helmet. - Actually, it's not a helmet,"
Scrubs
"it's a hair-met."
Scrubs
"See, it's got extra room built in so you don't mess up your hairdo."
Scrubs
"[J.D.] That's weird. It felt like that had happened before."
Scrubs
"situations are bound to repeat themselves."
Scrubs
"In your end-o."
Scrubs
"Hey, champ, what has two thumbs and doesn't give a crap?"
Scrubs
"Oh, I can't wait!"
Scrubs
"... or Dr. Cox giving Elliot a hard time..."
Scrubs
"are you a real doctor or a doctor like Dr Pepper's a doctor?"
Scrubs
"It's a riddle. You figure it out."
Scrubs
"Troy, get your hat."
Scrubs
"We're going to the bank."
Scrubs
"I never went to Acapulco, Mrs. Goldstein."
Scrubs
"in the afterlife and they could rightly have their vengeance."
Scrubs
"as I'd be sent straight to hell, which, I imagine is a lot like Acapulco,"
Scrubs
"only there'd be fewer Latin men trying to sell me Chiclets on the beach."
Scrubs
"I suppose you could wait and see how she does."
Scrubs
"Well, those are the two options, so what are you gonna do?"
Scrubs
"He's probably just thinking it over, Elliot."
Scrubs
"I'm not wearing a party hat, sitting bare-ass on the hospital copier machine."
Scrubs
"You know why? It's not because I have "Johnny" tattooed on my butt."
Scrubs
"It's because your little theory is way off."
Scrubs
"[Turk] I get to watch whatever I want while she reads her pregnancy book."
Scrubs
"- I get to eat all the good food. - Echhh."
Scrubs
"Ring of fire!"
Scrubs
"[Turk] Bottom line, pregnancy's awesome!"
Scrubs
"I could swear we've done this before."
Scrubs
"and... a button"
Scrubs
"You broke my sunglasses in half."
Scrubs
"But what if I'm wrong?"
Scrubs
"he'll have a beer, and I'll have an appletini."
Scrubs
"OK, ice cold beer, nectarini"
Scrubs
"There's nothing better in this world"
Scrubs
"Ditto for a 'tini."
Scrubs
"- It really takes the edge off. - That's it."
Scrubs
"No beer for you. It's not fair."
Scrubs
"Fair is fair, Turk."
Scrubs
"Incidentally, dynamite nectarini."
Scrubs
"Look, Dr. Cox, I know that you're scared,"
Scrubs
"I'm just glad you let me help."
Scrubs
"Maybe that's why it hurts that much more when you end up looking like a fool."
Scrubs
"This is why the headache didn't go away."
Scrubs
"Barbie, there you are. Thank God."
Scrubs
"Don't get me wrong, I want to watch something about Lindsay Lohan."
Scrubs
"I'm just a little lost here."
Scrubs
"If your pregnant wife can't have coffee, then you can't."
Scrubs
"Please have some sort of nut."
Scrubs
"Next thing, she'll want you in the delivery room,"
Scrubs
"holding her hands while she pushes the little bugger out."
Scrubs
"Hopefully, that won't come back to haunt me."
Scrubs
"Where did you get this? Who taught you how to use this thing?"
Scrubs
"You, all right? I learned from watching you!"
Scrubs
"Damn it, Billy!"
Scrubs
"A penny and..."
Scrubs
"The correct answer is a quarter and a nickel."
Scrubs
"What a jackass."
Scrubs
"I don't want to hear Floating Head Doctor."
Scrubs
"Oh, don't you worry about that."
Scrubs
"[EIliot] What are you doing? Oh!"
Scrubs
"Oh, you want some of this?"
Scrubs
"J.D., don't worry about it. I'll handle it."
Scrubs
"[Sighing]"
Scrubs
"- You can't ride the bike. - Why not?"
Scrubs
"It puts too much pressure on my cervix."
Scrubs
"Are you calling me a bitch?"
Scrubs
"You know, I've been thinking about it"
Scrubs
"Barbie, please. They're about to show Lindsay's breakfast nook."
Scrubs
"Plus, I can't believe these words are coming out of my mouth,"
Scrubs
"It feels like since I got pregnant, everything's changing for me,"
Scrubs
"Just maybe not do it in front of me?"
Scrubs
"maybe you can ask me about it?"
Scrubs
"How's Mrs. Goldstein doing?"
Scrubs
"How's about we act like adults here and lay our cards on the table?"
Scrubs
"And I say that knowing full well you feel the same way about me."
Scrubs
"We could, except for one thing."
Scrubs
"I know we have our issues, but I always respected you."
Scrubs
"And you haven't given me more than an ounce of that since I started here."
Scrubs
"And hopefully, admitting this to you will make you feel..."
Scrubs
"...respected."
Scrubs
"It does."
Scrubs
"[# The Weepies: The World Spins Madly On]"
Scrubs
"Gotta run. They're doing a breast reduction on three,"
Scrubs
"that you're nothing but a large pair of scrubs to me?"
Scrubs
"the subtle differences within those moments."
Scrubs
"What the hell?"
Scrubs
"One of them wasn't me."
Scrubs
"Oh, that's what happened to my old bike."
Scrubs
"Ha!"
Scrubs
"shattered the record for the most blood donations in a month."
Scrubs
"Whoo!"
Scrubs
"Nineteen pints!"
Scrubs
"[J.D.] Even though we were sending Ernie upstairs"
Scrubs
"to most likely get some of his own blood back,"
Scrubs
"Today, Dr. Cox was returning back to work"
Scrubs
"Mrs. Riley was admitted with shortness of breath"
Scrubs
"Aw, screw it!"
Scrubs
"You sent those demons right back to hell, didn't you? Straight to hell!"
Scrubs
"Newbie, there are some things that, if they happen,"
Scrubs
"a cure for cancer, teaching dogs to talk,"
Scrubs
"and you walking past the food cart"
Scrubs
"without referring to cream cheese as "cow fudge.""
Scrubs
"I like to play with words."
Scrubs
"However, of all the things there are to make a big deal out of,"
Scrubs
"can my return to this hellhole please,"
Scrubs
"please, please not be one of them?"
Scrubs
"But, uh, there is one problem."
Scrubs
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