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Clips from What We Do in the Shadows - A Farewell (S03E03)

"Okay, well..."
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"kind of thought this moment was gonna be a bit more about me,"
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"but, uh, anyway, thank you all."
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"And now, I bid you all farewell."
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"-[crying]: Oh, farewell. - Farewell. Farewell."
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"And... [sniffles]"
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"Don't film us like this."
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"[normal voice]: Colin, come on."
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"-[crying resumes] - Eat shit."
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"[sighs]: Aye. Thank you."
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"Let go of my hand!"
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"[groans]"
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"I wish you weren't doing this, Master."
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"[sighs]"
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"My dear Guillermo."
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"You will miss me."
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"Close the lid."
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"[sighs deeply]"
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"♪"
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"[creaking]"
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"Please, guys."
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"Does everything have to be on camera?"
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"Just-- can you please just give me like a minute?"
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"Just please."
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"[banging]"
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"[bell tolling]"
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"Well..."
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"what's done is done."
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"[coughing]"
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"[groans] I come bearing news."
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"Why can't you use a fucking door like anyone else?"
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"What's the point of being able to turn into smoke"
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"if you're just going to go around using doors?"
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"- What is your news? -[clearing throat]"
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""The Supreme Worldwide Vampiric Council"
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""has invited you to receive"
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""a delegation from the Old World..."
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"-[laughs] -"...here at your home,"
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""with the intent of inspecting"
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"the progress you've made thus far in running the council.""
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"LASZLO: This is a huge honor for us,"
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"but like all huge honors, it's a pain in the nutsack."
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"- But a huge honor all the same. - Yes."
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"I have always dreamed of meeting someone important."
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"No one important ever came to our village."
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"There was one time that the rubbish man came"
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"to collect all the shit, and he assigned, uh,"
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"pieces of rubbish for the children and autographed it."
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"We danced for the next three months,"
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"so you can imagine this is just..."
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"Wow! Very exciting for me."
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"And when will this delegation be arriving?"
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"Let's see, on the night of..."
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"tonight."
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"- What? - At the hour of 8:30."
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"8:30 tonight?"
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"- Mm-hmm. - NADJA: This is all very, very soon."
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"Maybe they could come tomorrow night,"
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"and then we could really lay on a really..."
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"The Supreme Worldwide Vampiric Council"
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"does not shift things around in their book!"
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"All right, all right. Keep your hair on."
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"I've already arranged for some local vampires to come round"
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"for Colin Robinson's birthday."
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"The more the merrier."
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"- Wait. I-I have to share my birthday party with a... - NADJA: Yes!"
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"You're lucky to have a birthday party!"
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"It's true. And now, you and Nandor should prepare"
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"some remarks about running the council together."
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"- They're very intrigued. - GUILLERMO: Well, the thing is..."
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"[Nadja stammers]"
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"- 8:30 is perfect, thank you. - GUIDE: Wonderful."
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"[others coughing]"
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"Geez Louise."
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"- Ideas? - I should wake him up?"
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"- We'll just wake him up. - GUILLERMO: I should wake him up."
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"- Wake him up. - Okay."
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"♪"
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"Master?"
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"Master, I'm sorry."
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"Master?"
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"NANDOR: Who is there, and what is going on?"
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"Sorry, it's me, Guillermo. Sorry."
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"[creaking]"
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"[yawning]"
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"Wow."
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"800 years really went by so fast."
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"- Well, that's because technically... - Oh."
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"Guillermo, you look awful."
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"- Okay. - The ravages of time have not been kind to you"
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"and your formerly boyish face."
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"Okay, well, it's because it-- not a lot of time has gone..."
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"- Tell me. - You've been asleep for 30 minutes."
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"Then why are you waking me up?!"
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"This is not an emergency at all."
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"But we have told everyone"
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"that we are coleaders of the council."
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"Fine. I hereby relinquish my control."
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"You are now sole leader."
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"Congratulations, long live the Queen."
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"- Good night forever. - But the delegation is going to think..."
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"- Nandor, come back. Come back. -[groans] What?"
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"Why don't you just delay your Super Slumber"
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"a couple of days?"
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"You wouldn't miss Colin Robinson's birthday."
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"- Why do you have such a cock up... - Why would I give"
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"- a flying fuck about that? -...for Colin Robinson's birthday?"
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"Just inform the delegation that I was a threat to power,"
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"so you killed me."
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"You rule without mercy, remember?"
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"- They love that shit. - That would be a humiliating end for you."
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"Who cares? Not me."
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"So, good night, forever."
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"See you in 100 years, probably not."
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"Master, I really wish you weren't doing this."
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"Again with the "make me a vampire" shit?"
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"No. No, no, I don't even care about that anymore."
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"- I just... I don't want you to go. -[groans]"
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"So just stick around for the next 100 years,"
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"and we'll be together again when I wake up."
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