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Clips from The Simpsons - Grampa vs. Sexual Inadequacy (S06E06)

"Please, Marge. How often can I see a movie of this caliber..."
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"It's just that I've only seen this twice before..."
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"...and I've seen you every night for the last 11 ye..."
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"What I meant to say is, we'll snuggle tomorrow, sweetie."
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"Enchiladas."
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"Mom! Dad!"
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"Don't turn on the light!"
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"There's a UFO outside my window. Seriously."
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"Can I sleep in there with you guys tonight?"
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"- No. - Can I sit on the roof..."
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"I hope you kept the Homie fires burning."
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"- Homer! Homer, wake up. Wake up. - What?"
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"Marge, there's just too much pressure."
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"What with my job, the kids, traffic snarls..."
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"- How about a book? - Okay."
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"Oh, all right."
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"Hey, Marge, this guy looks like Apu!"
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"I don't want people to see us looking at these books."
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"Yes, and I'm pursuing my interest in..."
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"It's a book on tape by Paul Harvey."
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"Mr. And Mrs. Erotic American."
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"This biography of Peter Uebberoth is only 99 cents."
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"- And I found the new Al Gore book. - Sane Planning, Sensible Tomorrow."
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"I hope it's as exciting as his other book:"
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"I'm getting this book on UFOs."
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"But there's a conspiracy to cover it up."
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"Oh, that's just a paranoid fantasy."
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"Hello, Americans. Paul Harvey here."
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"Did you know every good American is at heart an erotic American?"
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"A famous couple..."
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"I don 't need to tell you it was Dwight and Mamie Eisenhower."
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"- Offered this advice:"
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"...together.""
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"The faucet's jammed into my back."
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"I'm stuck."
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"So am I."
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"- Kids? - Kids?"
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"- Kids? - Kids?"
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"Sorry there, Fred and Ethel. Should have made a reservation."
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"We only got one room left."
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"The toilet is overflowing in the Caveman Room."
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"No, honey. It's a romantic fantasy. I imagine I'm the janitor, and you're..."
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"Don't mind me, folks. Just need to get the old wet-dry vac."
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"By now, your new improved love life should have you flinging woo..."
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"...like nobody's business."
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"...good day."
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"Welcome home, son. I broke two lamps and lost all your mail."
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"- What's wrong with your wife? - You wouldn't understand."
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"- Flu? - No."
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"Pneumonoultramicroscopic- silicovolcanoconiosis?"
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"- No. - Unsatisfying sex life?"
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"N... Yes! But please, don't you say that word."
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"What's so unappealing about hearing your elderly father..."
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"...talk about sex?"
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"You're home safe. See you the next time we need your signature."
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"Oh, you never wanna spend any time with me."
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"But I can help you with your loving problem."
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"I got a home remedy that'll put the dowsers back in your trousers."
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"Legend has it my great grandpappy stumbled upon this recipe..."
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"...when he was trying to invent a cheap substitute for holy water."
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"Here you g... Hey!"
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"Think of me when you're having the best sex of your life."
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"Drink it!"
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"Here's $50. Go to the movies, then take a cab to your aunt's."
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"What do you think Mom and Dad are doing?"
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"I don't know."
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"That tonic really works."
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"You and Grampa should bottle it and go into business together."
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"What about my New Year's resolution?"
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"You can make a lot of money."
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"Yeah. Where are my pants?"
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"Oh, hurry, Neddie. They're awful."
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"You just be ready with that garbage bag."
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"After years of disappointment with get-rich-quick schemes..."
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"...I know I'm gonna get rich with this scheme."
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"And quick."
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"You look like a man who needs help satisfying his wife. So..."
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"I guess people have some sort of moral objection to our sex drug."
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"Let me sell it, you idiot."
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"Step right up and witness the magnificent medicinal miracle..."
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"...of Simpson & Son's patented Revitalizing Tonic!"
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"Put some ardor in your larder with our energizing, moisturizing..."
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"...tantalizing, romanticizing, surprising, "her-prising," revitalizing tonic!"
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"What say we amscray out of here and have a wild wingding..."
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"Anything you say, professor."
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"Tonight, we'll push the twin beds together."
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"Yeah! Every single night."
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"...in Grampa Simpson's bathtub."
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"Who cares? With no adults around, I run this city."
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"Carry on."
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"Listen to this. "Unexplainable behavior."
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"Individuals acting in a secretive fashion..."
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"...are often involved with UFOs or other paranormal phenomena..."
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"...e.g. Telephone explosions.""
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"Scary, no? And this guy is head of the Spaceology Department..."
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"...at the Correspondence College of Tampa."
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"Will you cook my dinner for me?"
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"My parents aren't around and I'm not allowed to turn on the stove."
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"Hurry up. We got a lot of tonic to sell and a lot of towns to visit."
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"Frigid Falls, Mount Seldom, Lake Flaccid."
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"Great. I'm gonna be stuck in a car all weekend with that wheezy windbag."
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"And that's what's wrong with Bart's generation."
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"Now as for your generation..."
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"And for the minimal outlay of one dollar..."
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"...you can take home a bottle of liquid Lothario..."
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"Lock old Rover in the shed, because man has a new best friend..."
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"...in Simpson & Son's Revitalizing Tonic."
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"I'm not convinced. I've had bad luck with aphrodisiacs."
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"All questions will be answered, all fears will be allayed..."
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"...with one incontrovertible demonstration."
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"May I have a volunteer from the audience?"
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"Yes, you, sir."
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"You've never seen me before, is that correct?"
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"You're the worst shill ever!"
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"Okay. It's now painfully clear."
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"The adults are definitely paving the way for an invasion by the saucer people."
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"Or have they gotten to you too?"
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"Hey, hey, hey! Stop it! Stop it!"
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"Haven't you ever heard of Ockham's razor?"
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"The simplest explanation is probably the correct one."
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