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Clips from Seinfeld - The Chinese Woman (S06E06)

"You got a comfort problem there?"
Seinfeld
"No, I think these Jockeys shrunk."
Seinfeld
"I wore them for a month, but I couldn't stick with it."
Seinfeld
"I need the secure packaging of Jockeys."
Seinfeld
"My boys need a house."
Seinfeld
"That's nice."
Seinfeld
"Listen, if you ever wanna have kids, you shouldn't wear briefs."
Seinfeld
"Boxers are better for your sperm count."
Seinfeld
"Sperm count?"
Seinfeld
"- With the Chinese woman? - She knew who I was."
Seinfeld
"My first date ever with the Pacific Rim. I'm very excited."
Seinfeld
"I'm sorry, Kramer. Those records are permanently sealed."
Seinfeld
"Really?"
Seinfeld
"I'm surprised. You've slept with a lot of women."
Seinfeld
"Do you think maybe I'm..."
Seinfeld
"...depleted?"
Seinfeld
"Well, I'm sure you're not totally depleted."
Seinfeld
"But what if I am? I'm the last male Kramer."
Seinfeld
"Into a cup in the middle of the day?"
Seinfeld
"All right, I'm gonna try Noreen again."
Seinfeld
"She's Chinese, so you suggest Chinese food?"
Seinfeld
"She's very assimilated."
Seinfeld
"- Paul again? - You can't get one ring past him."
Seinfeld
"- Hey, hey. You don't call me back? - I tried."
Seinfeld
"Your line's crossed with a Chinese woman."
Seinfeld
"Hey, George, we saw your father on the street before."
Seinfeld
"You didn't ask him?"
Seinfeld
"- You didn't say hello? - Well, he was with someone..."
Seinfeld
"Why was he wearing a cape?"
Seinfeld
"A cape."
Seinfeld
"What was my father doing with a man in a cape?"
Seinfeld
"Why a cape?"
Seinfeld
"The results of your sperm test are in."
Seinfeld
"Are you planning to start a family?"
Seinfeld
"- Yes, I'm afraid you're a little low. - Oh, man!"
Seinfeld
"It's over. The Kramer name is finished."
Seinfeld
"- I'm never gonna procreate, huh? - That's not necessarily true."
Seinfeld
"There are measures you can take to improve fertility."
Seinfeld
"First thing, you should wear boxer shorts."
Seinfeld
"- All the time? - All the time."
Seinfeld
"You have to get off Jockeys right away."
Seinfeld
"Hi, Paul, it's Elaine calling."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, I'm calling from a car phone, so I don't really have time to talk."
Seinfeld
"Is Noreen there?"
Seinfeld
"She's not? Okay, great."
Seinfeld
"Well, yes, it has been unseasonably cool lately."
Seinfeld
"Lookit, Paul, the car seems to be running out of gas..."
Seinfeld
"Please let me know when your party has arrived."
Seinfeld
"Yes, I will."
Seinfeld
"- Excuse me? - Hi, sorry I'm late."
Seinfeld
"- Who are you? - I'm Donna Chang."
Seinfeld
"What do you mean?"
Seinfeld
"I mean I'm Donna Chang."
Seinfeld
"- You're Donna Chang? - Did you think I was Chinese?"
Seinfeld
"- I didn't think so. - Used to be Changstein."
Seinfeld
"- She's not Chinese? - No, not Chinese."
Seinfeld
"Not even Asian."
Seinfeld
"- So, what is she? - Well, she's like you."
Seinfeld
"Oh, how disappointed you must have been."
Seinfeld
"Well, it's false advertising, see?"
Seinfeld
"And the thing is, I think she likes people thinking she's Chinese."
Seinfeld
"She suggests Chinese food..."
Seinfeld
"...she always introduces herself as Donna Chang."
Seinfeld
"- So why are you seeing her again? - Well, she is a woman."
Seinfeld
"Listen, I spoke to Paul and Noreen. They might be breaking up."
Seinfeld
"- Really? - Well, maybe."
Seinfeld
"Hey, wouldn't it be funny if Paul and Noreen broke up..."
Seinfeld
"- What do you mean? - If Paul thought it was some guy..."
Seinfeld
"Here, take my Jockey shorts."
Seinfeld
"Look, you gotta help me. I have to get off Jockey shorts."
Seinfeld
"- What, you have low sperm count? - Very low."
Seinfeld
"Jerry, look, you gotta help. If I have one pair in my house, I'll wear them."
Seinfeld
"- I don't want them. - All it takes is one pair."
Seinfeld
"I'm not gonna be able to sleep if those are in the house."
Seinfeld
"Look at that. They're bagging up. They're rising here."
Seinfeld
"What am I gonna do?"
Seinfeld
"Well, I'm gonna have to move now."
Seinfeld
"Queens is full of mosquitoes."
Seinfeld
"- So, Dad- - Gnats too, if I'm not mistaken."
Seinfeld
"Your mother has to tell you every move I make? I'll kill her."
Seinfeld
"- Jerry and Elaine saw you. - They didn't say hello?"
Seinfeld
"- They were in a rush. - They couldn't just say hello?"
Seinfeld
"The hell with them."
Seinfeld
"They said you were with some guy who was wearing a cape."
Seinfeld
"- Did they uncross the lines yet? - They can't find the problem."
Seinfeld
"Did you say ridicurous?"
Seinfeld
"...ridicurous."
Seinfeld
"I wanted to talk to you. Didn't know you had company."
Seinfeld
"- Oh, no, no. - Hi, I'm George."
Seinfeld
"Oh, hi. I'm Donna Chang."
Seinfeld
"- You spoke to my mother? - She was trying to call you, but-"
Seinfeld
"The rines are crossed."
Seinfeld
"Did you say the rines are crossed?"
Seinfeld
"George, she's so sweet. We talked for an hour."
Seinfeld
"Anyway, I'm really sorry."
Seinfeld
"Sorry? Why sorry? What do you have to be sorry about?"
Seinfeld
"Well, she told me she and your father are getting divorced."
Seinfeld
"Boy, divorced. That's really too bad."
Seinfeld
"Yeah. You know, it's a shame his parents..."
Seinfeld
"...didn't get divorced 30 years ago."
Seinfeld
"He could've been normal."
Seinfeld
"You know what I just realized?"
Seinfeld
"If they get divorced and live in two separate places..."
Seinfeld
"Imagine if I had to see them both on the same day."
Seinfeld
"It's like running a double marathon."
Seinfeld
"Hey, Georgie, did you have any idea that anything was wrong?"
Seinfeld
"Have you ever spent any time with these people?"
Seinfeld
"- You know what this has to do with? - What?"
Seinfeld
"The man in the cape. I bet you he is mixed up in this."
Seinfeld
"I don't trust men in capes."
Seinfeld
"You can't cast aspersions on someone..."
Seinfeld
"...just because they're wearing a cape."
Seinfeld
"Superman wore a cape."
Seinfeld
"...and let you say something bad about him."
Seinfeld
"All right, Superman's the exception."
Seinfeld
"No, Kramer, you don't understand, this could be my fault."
Seinfeld
"Well, looks like you've adjusted to the boxers."
Seinfeld
"Well, I wouldn't go as far as that."
Seinfeld
"- You went back to the Jockeys? - Wrong again."
Seinfeld
"Oh, no."
Seinfeld
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