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Clips from The Flintstones - The Split Personality (S01E01)

"He must be caught in a traffic jam. What do you want him for?"
The Flintstones
"Okay, Barney. I'll tell him to call you when he gets home."
The Flintstones
"And by the way, thanks for the hospitality, Wilma."
The Flintstones
"- Did you have a tough day, dear? - Yeah."
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"Suck a lemon. That'll quench your thirst."
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"- Aw, Fred. - Don't "Aw, Fred" me."
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"I'm returning your lawnmower, your rake, your hedge shears, and your hose!"
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"My Cactus Coola. You didn't get to it yet?"
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"How do you like that?"
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"'cause it's the last time I'm talking to you. Go ahead, ask."
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"Car polish?"
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"Car polish! I'm poisoned."
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"It never fails. Soon as I get in the shower that man wants something."
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"- and she'll think he's asleep. - Sneak him into the house?"
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"Easy, Barney, easy."
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"Hiya, Wilma. So, what else is new?"
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"Have no fear, medical science is here."
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"All right, madam..."
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"I'm not a mind reader, you know."
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"- Back to the pasture. - Why, he's a veterinarian."
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"- Still out. - I think I can snap him out of it."
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"- How, Wilma? - Watch."
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"Bernard, please, not Freddie."
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"I'm sure you won't mind addressing me properly."
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"- How are you, my dear? - See? He's all right. He knows me."
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"If you ask me, Fred's flipped his lid."
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"I'm telling you, that sock on the noggin knocked a screw loose in Fred's head."
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"Is it possible for a man to be too nice?"
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"That reminds me. This is the night I vacuum the house."
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"Wait till you hear this one, my dear. It's different."
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"Oh, no, I hate this one. The pizzicatos are too andante."
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"I hate opera."
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"The orchestra is definitely out of tune."
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"Yeah, they get caught in the tar, and they gradually sink."
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"They ought to put a fence around him."
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"I bet she'd settle for the spelling bees. At least they don't hurt your ears."
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"How quaint."
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"That's the old, crude me."
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"That's you at the Rubbles' New Year's party."
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"And here's you when you won that pie eating contest."
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"Get up there and make a strike."
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"It went into the gutter. What happened, Fred?"
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"Barney, what's going on?"
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"Because I'm saving his life, that's why."
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"maybe another crack on the noggin will change him back."
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"I can't do it either."
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"Frederick has a hard head, you know."
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"I'm glad your plebeian tastes are getting elevated."
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"Okay, okay!"
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"I thought I told you we were through, Rubble."
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"Back, send it back!"
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"The fellows need me. I'm the captain of the team, you know."
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"Some poor mastodon is caught in the tar pit."
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"They ought to put a fence around the tar pit."
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"That's not a mastodon. It's Fred singing."
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"They ought to put a fence around him."
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"Let's see now, the tralafast is connected to the doohickey..."
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"the doohickey is connected to the franaspan..."
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"the franaspan's connected to the thingamajig."
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"The thingamajig's connected to the whozit, and the whozit..."
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"That's it. The whozit isn't connected."
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"Betty! Come to the window a minute."
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"- What is it, Barney? - I'm going over to see if Fred's home."
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"- I got to borrow a whozit wrench. - Okay, Barney."
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"Say hello to Wilma for me."
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"I don't know what we housewives would do without a good waste disposal."
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"- Anybody home? - Just a minute, Barney. I'll be right there."
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"Hiya, Wilma. Betty says to say hello."
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"So I'm saying hello."
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"You say hello to her for me."
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"- Is Fred home yet? - Not yet, Barney."
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"I wanted to borrow a whozit wrench from him."
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"I'll come back later."
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"Right."
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"You're welcome, Barney."
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"That Barney is so polite."
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"Such good manners."
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"I wish Fred would learn to be more like him."
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"Fred's a diamond in the rough..."
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"but even diamonds can stand polishing."
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"I'd love it if he'd come through that door every night..."
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"calm, urbane, with a smile on his lips."
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"Hello, Fred. I see you finally got home."
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"And it was so hot."
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"I bet it was terrible on the job."
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"And the traffic must've been awful."
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"A diamond in the rough, and they don't come any rougher."
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"What a day."
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"But in all that heavy traffic coming home..."
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"one thing kept me going."
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"As the car reached the lawn, I could see it."
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"There it was, right in front of me, big as life."
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"What was it, Fred?"
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"That frosty, cold bottle of Cactus Coola..."
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"I put in the icebox last night."
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"Fred, you're so overheated, you shouldn't drink anything cold."
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"Suck a lemon? Are you out of your mind?"
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"All the way home I kept thinking of that tall..."
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"cold, frosty cactus juice..."
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"trickling down my hot throat."
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"Suck a lemon."
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"I'm sorry I came home so grouchy."
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"But it won't happen again. I am turning over a new leaf."
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"No more yelling."
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"No more acting mean."
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"Wilma! Where is it?"
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"Where is what, Fred?"
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"My last bottle of cold Cactus Coola."
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"- Did you drink it, Wilma? Did you? - No, Fred, I didn't."
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"Barney took it."
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"Barney took it?"
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"- Yes. He's your friend, isn't he? - Friend?"
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"No friend would take a man's last cold bottle..."
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"on a hot day."
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"That does it. This is it!"
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"It's been coming on a long time, but this did it!"
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"I am through with that Barney Rubble. I disown him as a neighbor."
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"I'm never gonna speak to that guy again."
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"And I'm going over to his house right now and tell him."
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"I'll give him a piece of my mind."
The Flintstones
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