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Clips from Bob's Burgers - Mom, Lies and Videotapes (S07E07)

"western town till Meanie McQueen came in, breaking glass and kicking ass."
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"Ha! Now she's the sheriff!"
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"(Linda gasps)"
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"LOUISE: The moms of the town tried to stand up to Meanie,"
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"The sheriff knew he couldn't handle"
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"Meanie McQueen on his own."
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"He needed help"
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"cactus kicker he ever knew."
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"- Mom? - Hello, son."
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"- What you knitting? - Spurs."
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"I need your help."
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"you never call, you're critical of my life choices."
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"Is that what this is about?"
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"- You were in jail! - In jail on business!"
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"Lies!"
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"Well, a no-good meanie named Meanie McQueen"
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"took my badge and keys and threw all the moms"
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"in my town in jail."
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"Now it's a... town with no moms."
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"I think so."
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"Well, then, sounds like you need a little help."
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"I told my mom on you."
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"I love it."
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"- And you're telling the story so well. - Achoo!"
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"Because sometimes I stutter,"
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"but I feel like I got that out pretty clearly."
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"that were invented recently."
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"And you're gonna knock it off."
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"Let me tell you what I'm gonna knock off."
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"right off of your face."
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"Taking care of you is gonna be a snap."
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"(pops mouth)"
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"That sounds like a stretch."
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"Whoa, this is getting tense."
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"(deep, wheezing breath)"
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"And I'm not gonna do that thing where I fling my rubber band"
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"(screams, then grunts)"
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"Is it safe for a kid to fall off"
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"It's fine. Millie trained for weeks for that fall."
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"Yeah, she's Jessica Alba's stunt double."
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"- Okay, I give up! - Really?"
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"Make it real quick."
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"Uh, thank you."
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"Mom, you got Meanie."
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"You fought my battles for me."
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"No!"
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"She got me, Rudy."
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"Damn them to hell!"
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"Oh, Rudy."
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"You'll live."
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"'Cause I raised you to live."
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"(crying)"
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"And always remember to breathe harder than others."
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"(wheezing): ... chacho."
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"(deep, wheezing breath)"
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"What a tearjerker."
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"been doing my homework lately."
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"I've been so focused on that play."
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"It was very impressive to see, in person."
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"Yeah. (whistles)"
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"Mm-hmm. (whistles)"
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"Tina, what'd your class do?"
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"Um, it's all so fresh, I'm still kind of remembering what we did."
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"We did kind of a skit song with xylophones and clouds."
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"It was called "Eternally Maternal.""
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"Ooh, a skit song."
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"I was completely in sync with everyone else,"
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"We made clouds, TV, breadsticks,"
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"A banana-ffalo."
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"It's half banana, half buffalo."
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"Greek, Roman, Pokémon, Tex-Mex, you know."
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"Sure, sure."
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"Boy, do we have it good, except..."
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"♪ Under-snuggled ♪"
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"- Gentle? - Gentle?"
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"We could call her Mombo."
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"Or Mom for short?"
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"♪ And she'd smell just like you remember ♪"
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"♪ Yeah ♪"
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"- Huh? - Wait, what?"
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"Oh, okay, sure."
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"GENE: And they played Keep Away over the audience"
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"and people went crazy."
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"LINDA: Oh, that Yango and Yongo."
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"Why don't they want a mom?"
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"Yingo's pretty great, though, right?"
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"Gene, go on with your incredibly accurate accounting"
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"of what happened earlier tonight."
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"I will. There I was,"
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"searching the universe for the Staff of Creation."
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"I can't find anything."
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"I want to have someone like a mom."
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"Wait, how'd you create her without the Staff of Creation?"
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"♪ Oh, I sure would like to have someone like a mom ♪"
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"♪ I'd do your homework when you don't wanna ♪"
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"♪ As long as you take care of it ♪"
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"BOTH: ♪ Oh, I sure would like ♪"
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"Because I'm not real."
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"I'm just a vision."
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"You just need to believe."
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"If you believe,"
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"put your hand under your armpit and squeeze."
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"And everyone was dancing on the ceiling,"
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"and this was way before Lionel Richie."
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"they can't tape a school play to save their lives,"
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"they smell weird, their knees are backwards..."
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"Okay, Gene, we get it."
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"Yeah, that's the crew kids."
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"They express themselves through pulleys."
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"Ooh, all right. (retches)"
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"It took place out of this world."
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"to wipe out an incredibly dangerous alien species"
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"And we got the tools. Ha! Come on."
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"Yeah, take that, alien."
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"We'll need to be careful and brave,"
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"- Which is annoying. - Like stepping on a dead bee."
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"Y'all ever done that? One time..."
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"TINA: But before they entered into the fight of their lives,"
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"they had to do something real quick."
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"... that stinger's about four inches long."
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