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Clips from Kevin Can Wait - Chore Weasel (S01E01)

"Oh, shoot!"
Kevin Can Wait
"Oh, the new armoire is being delivered today,"
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"and someone has to be home"
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"No, what am I thinking? She's still in Rhode Island."
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"And I would do anything to help out my future mother-in-law."
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"I'm heading into the city."
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"and I need you to be home"
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"and you can help me with these kind of things."
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"That's what you do every other day."
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"It's by choice, though, Donna. It's a big difference."
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"You threw your back out, Duffy lost a tooth,"
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"No, it wasn't a concussion."
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"about us being retired."
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"Our prostates are normal-sized.""
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"2016."
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"The setting... Mansfield Park, Massapequa."
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"Uhh... we're not playing."
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"What?!"
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"to wait for an armoire."
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"She asked me to do her a favor, you know."
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"Yeah, I heard of that."
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"Yeah, we used one last week. 17 bucks an hour."
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"Great show."
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"I don't know, man."
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"You don't."
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"and you'll get the invoice sent to your phone."
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"And it's not a big deal or anything,"
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"You'll hear our Chore Weasel tone..."
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"- and you're all set. - Great."
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"It's just that I don't want my wife to be part of..."
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"Ohhh!"
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"Blake? You still here?"
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"It was. We don't play to lose."
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"- You guys won? - We did not."
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"Whoa. You okay?"
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"- Really? - Yeah."
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"I mean, I fought her pretty hard on just waiting for it, so..."
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"then I put it together?"
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"Sturdy, too, huh?"
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"Upstairs?"
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"Yeah!"
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"It didn't put itself together."
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"No, you went the extra mile."
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"Now, you come over here and you give me a kiss."
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"I just want you to know I'm really impressed."
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"Well, you know what it is? I like working with my hands."
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"Oh?"
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"Oh."
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"Well, as long as you have that attitude,"
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"I guess you know this one's a surprise now,"
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"so I probably shouldn't do it, right?"
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"No. You should."
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"We didn't have him yet."
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"Surprise me."
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"This is serious, and I need you to listen to me, all right?"
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"So would you..."
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"be able to put a shim under my air conditioner?"
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"I can't because I'm on the ladder,"
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"I mean, you were a cop,"
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"Not every day. Some days, we had to file."
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"But the point is, you don't just turn that off."
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"What are you, 38?"
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"Why don't you sit down, have a beer,"
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"- What? - Get down, get down!"
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"What?"
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"Stay low, stay low."
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"Do me a favor... just grab the garbage on the way out."
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"Oh, wow. Was all that crap up there?"
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"Yeah, it was jammed in there pretty tight."
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"- Yeah, it's a Silver Alert. - Silver Alert?"
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"She's gonna be fine."
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"No."
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"Oh, honey, you should sign up for it."
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"Yeah, it takes a village."
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"My face doesn't feel like it's wrapped in barbed wire."
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"It's just weakness leaving my body?"
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"My doctor took X-rays and said"
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"I got what they call a floating elbow."
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"Guys, all right, come on, we can't let this slow us down."
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"- You're still using that guy? - Yeah. He's awesome."
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"He's got an unbelievable view on life, on living it, man!"
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"This... hustling."
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"Who's with me?"
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"- I'm not. - What?"
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"Guy, Google "floating elbow,""
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"Good for him."
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"I ask him to do something, and he just... does it."
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"Huh. That's weird."
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"Although, do you notice anything strange?"
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"Have you noticed anything unusual..."
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"No, nothing. No, nothing."
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"You'd best sit."
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"So, what do you know?"
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"I know you have no right to question me like this."
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"You know what? Mom, can you just give me a second with him?"
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"Hey, babe, you want something to drink?"
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"I've got nothing to say."
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"Are you sure? I can take you to your driveway?"
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"No. No, no. Here's fine. Here's good."
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"I-I've been an Islander fan all my life"
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"- They are ticklish! - Yeah."
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"they cough it up immediately."
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"- I should probably get going. - All right."
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"Oh, hey, uh, don't forget your puck."
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"- No. - Yeah."
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"You are awesome, Mr. Gable."
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"If you ever need anything, you call me."
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"Hey, guys."
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"That would be my friend Blake."
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"Oh."
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"Okay, it's not what you think."
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"and then you turn around and take all the credit."
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"Mm-hmm."
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"Did you actually do"
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"I had to sell it."
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"Just the one."
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"I really didn't give you anything"
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"I can't believe you."
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"Oh, how much are you paying him?"
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"Not that much."
Kevin Can Wait
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