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Clips from Ted 2 (2015)(sub)

"(GROWLING)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I'm sorry, Your Honor. I'm on my period."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"And live from New York, it's Saturday Night! (APPLAUSE)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"What is taking them so long?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I mean saying his name three times."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"What?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"No, Johnny, he'll be on our side."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"(INDISTINCT TALKING)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Please be seated."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Yes, we have, Your Honor. (CLEARS THROAT)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Um, in the case of Ted v. The Commonwealth of Massachusetts,"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"(SIGHS)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"JUDGE: Very well."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"and will be recognized in the terms set"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Are you sure you can get him?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Remember, you're on your own out there."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Hasbro can have no connection to this."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Oh, I'll get him."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Yes, I remember it."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Should we say it just for safety?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Say it. Just say it. Say it."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Fresh cakes."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Teddy's a good man."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Putting different people into little groups"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"and making them watch Tyler Perry."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"No, I'm sorry! I thought I'd built a better case."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"It's just..."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"The reality is you have a really shitty lawyer."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"and I... I can't believe it's official."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Oh, so what are we gonna do now?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Yeah."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Yeah, that had a sad ending though, you remember?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"She was at a Veterans Day parade,"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"and somebody handed her a bunch of balloons"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"It was very sad. Very sad for the family."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"You know what? If anyone can get this verdict overturned, it's him."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"He's not cheap,"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"but we've become such a high profile case,"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I feel like he might take it pro Bono."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"He's a sucker for media."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Yeah, that's a good idea."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Hi, I'm calling for Patrick Meighan. This is Samantha Jackson."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I defended Ted Clubber Lang in Ted v. Massachusetts."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Hey!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"(JOHN GRUNTING)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Yeah, that's actually why I'm calling. (BOTH GRUNTING)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Well, yeah. I mean, it would have to be a pro Bono situation"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"because we're not really working with much money."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"But I think you'll be impressed with my client."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"He said he'll meet with us on Friday at 9:00 a.m."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I don't want to jinx it, but I think so."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I still get a shot! JOHN: Yes!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Let's go down to the improv and yell sad suggestions?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"So first we need a historical event. Who's got an event?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"TED: 9/11."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"JOHN: Robin Williams!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Okay, all right, for real, guys, for real. Who's got a person?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Let's maybe give somebody else over here a chance."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Okay, seriously, sir, uh, I just need alocafion."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"JOHN: Nobody said "Starbucks.""
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"All right, Starbucks. Okay, now, who's in the Starbucks?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"TED: Bill Cosby."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"You people are monsters."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"JOHN: We're giving you the tools, buddy."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Come on, make some fucking comedy."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"You go kick some ass because I am not taking off this wedding ring."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"(HIP-HOP PLAYING ON STEREO)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Hey, Sam, why do you have a duffel bag that says "Arizona State"?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Because that's where I went to school."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Yeah, why?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Oh, man, that's why we lost the case."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Arizona State. Hey, how many times you been fucked on a houseboat?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"(LAUGHING) (LAUGHING)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Yeah. Yeah, I did. I got an A on it."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"TED: So do you say "Arizona State University" or do you just say "HPVU"?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"This is perfect. We're gonna get to the city before 10:00."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Hey, Sam, how's your boring salad?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Mmm, it's actually delicious."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Everybody always says that about their salad."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"They're all a bunch of fucking liars."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Have some Cookie Crisp. You need something nutritional."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Because you've been staring at it, and you want it."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Hey, what's the deal here? You guys ever gonna make out or what?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Teddy, come on, dude!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"No, I'm just saying. You look like you're hitting it off, you know?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Sam, you dig him, right?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Where the hell's my coffee? I've been waiting for 10 minutes."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I'm so sorry, sir. I forgot. I'll get it right away."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Jesus, you're a waitress, you're not building rockets. Figure it out!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"What a prick!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I used to pitch for the softball team at Arizona State."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Oh, yeah? Was your mascot a broken condom?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Shut up."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Oh, my God! Holy shit!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Who did that?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Oh, Jesus Christ. You got to be kidding me!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Now, we're assholes. Look what you did."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I swear to God, I'll kick your goddamn ass! Who was it?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Uh, sir, I apologize for my 5-year-old son."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"(IN KID'S VOICE) I'm sorry!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Sorry, sir."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Cookie Crisp in your bum-bumzies. I'm sorry. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Well, under the circumstances, I guess it's okay."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Oh, my God. Now we're even bigger assholes."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Go get my Cookie Crisp out of his ass."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"You guys making trouble over here?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Uh, no, ma'am. We're just minding our business."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Let's try to keep your boyfriend under control here, yeah?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"We'll just get the check. Thanks."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Of course."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"TED: Oh, my God."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"She was giving you the fuck-me eyes."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Do I have fuck-me eyes?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Yeah, we got to be well rested for tomorrow."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I'll drive. You can take a nap."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"You don't have a license."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Who cares? Johnny lets me drive"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"every once in a while when he's too hammered."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I'm a fucking pro!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
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