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Clips from Ted 2 (2015)(sub)

"Come on, read between the lines, Sam. It's "Fuck.""
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Yeah, well, whatever. Ted Clubber Lang. Get used to it."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Sir?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Fresh cakes! (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"What is it, Danny'?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Uh, Donny, sir."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Well, Donny, I'm extremely busy with the Comic Con presentation..."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I'm told that you have an open-door policy here at Hasbro"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"for new toy ideas from any and all employees?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Yeah, I suppose that's true."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"All right, come in."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Okay."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Thank you. Thank you. I love your dress."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I can make this company a billion dollars."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I'm listening."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Thirty years ago,"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Somehow, one of our Hasbro bears..."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Yes, I'm aware of the story."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"(SIGHS)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"So what?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Well, Ted is suing for his civil rights."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"a non-entity with no rights under the law."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"That means he becomes property."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Mr. Jessup,"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"we could take him back, with only a trivial degree cf legal consequence"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"And why would we do this?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Sir, if we could cut him open to see what makes him tick,"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"we could manufacture millions of Teds for every child in the world."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Hasbro would double its profits overnight."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Go on."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"We just have to make sure Ted loses the case."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"You use every back channel, every bribe,"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"you call in every favor"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"and you get the best lawyer in the world on the defense."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"When Ted's rights are officially null,"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"we grab him."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"No one's going to kick up a legal fuss over property."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Mr. Jessup, I'm not interested in money."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I just want a Ted for my very own."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"All right. I think I can handle the defense."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Do you understand?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"(WHISPERS) Yes, I do."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"(EXHALES)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I need Shep Wild."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I've never had Pringles on my steak before."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Oh, it's my pleasure."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"It's the least I can do with all you're doing for us. Really."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Oh, I haven't done anything yet."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Well, you know, we wanted to take you out to dinner,"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"but, uh, (SIGHS) all we got is Tami's income these days since nobody will hire me."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"BJs here! Get your BJs! Get your red-hot BJs!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Get your BJs here."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Wow."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Hey, listen, I got an idea."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Uh, Tami, what do you say you and me g0 do the dishes"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"and give Sam and Diane here some alone time, eh?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"(LAUGHS) All right, all right."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Hey, you go pull a bad back, bitch!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"What do you think that was about?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Uh, yeah, look..."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"We should probably focus our attention on the case for now."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I completely agree."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"You know, lam a little bit curious- How is it that a guy like you is unattached?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Shits. I'm sorry. That sucks."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"but she was always just trying to change me"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"And I tried, you know?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"One day I woke up and I just realized I wasn't myself anymore."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"You know, as much as I love this person, we're completely wrong for each other."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"At least you figured it out early."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Some people go through their whole lives"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Yeah."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Honestly, I don't know."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Oh, we're betting on you."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Hey, Johnny, come on. It's almost 7:00. We got to get up there."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Hey, Sam, you want in on this?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"What is it?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"On Tuesday nights, we get fucked up and throw apples at joggers."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"TED: How's your workout? JOGGER: Fuck you!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Eat my pussy! Have some apples!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Jesus, what the hell is your problem?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"It's everybody else's fault, Mary Decker!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Barn!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"That's what you get for fucking exercising!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Teddy."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Baby, we're gonna be fine."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I don't care what any fucking piece of paper says. You're my wife."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I love you so much."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"And I swear to God, if we lose,"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I'm gonna fucking cut that judge."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Wait a minute. You brought your switchblade?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Oh!"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"That is why we've been working so hard. That's Shep Wild."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"He's never lost a case in his life."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Mr. Wild, your opening statement, if you please."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Thank you, Your Honor."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I would first like to thank the ladies and gentlemen of the jury"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"for taking time out of their busy schedules"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"to be a part of these proceedings."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Now, the case we'll be examining today is really quite a simple one."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Is Ted a human being?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Or a piece of property?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"You know, it really is a very special, very unique thing to be human."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"It's a gift from God bestowed upon only one species."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Us."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"where does that lead us?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Does your dog deserve human rights?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Your cat?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Your toaster?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"(SOFT CHUCKLE)"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Suddenly, being human doesn't seem so special anymore, does it?"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I'm confident you'll make the right decision."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"JUDGE: Thank you, Mr. Wild, for your opening statement."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Hi."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I am Samantha Jackson."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"Well, not because I'm a junior attorney arguing her first case."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"And not because some of you might laugh"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"at the fact that I'm representing a teddy bear."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"No, I'm... I'm nervous because of one simple word."
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
""Justice.""
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
"I'm nervous that you're going to be swayed"
Ted 2 (2015)(sub)
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