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Clips from South Park - Hooked on Monkey Fonics (S03E03)

"Come on up, Wendy."
South Park
"and everyone is decorating for tomorrow night, HALLOWEEN,"
South Park
"because there's a big first prize!"
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"Say boys, what do you think of KOZY-FM's Halloween Haunt so far?"
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"This one time, like eight months ago, I saw two guys kissing in a park."
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"Hey you guys! You know what time of year it is? - Of course, dumbass, it's Halloween."
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"That's right, and that means only two more months till Christmas!"
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"They just stick your hand in cold spaghetti and tell you it's intestines and stuff."
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"I'm your guide, Dr. Spookalot. Allow me to show around the lab. - Cool!"
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"Here I have a bowl of human eyeballs."
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"- And here you can feel the brains. - Oh-HO, grohoss."
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"Eewww, it feels like cold spaghetti! You guys, it feels like cold spaghetti!"
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"You guys, I'm gonna try and win that costume contest!"
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"We scared you, chickens!"
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"- W-we weren't scared! - Oh no? Well, you should be!"
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"Didn't you know? There's an old legend in South Park"
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"that says these docks are haunted by pirate ghosts."
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"They roam these docks with their swords and hook-hands"
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"Just wait till tomorrow! We're gonna scare you kids to death!"
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"We should come up with a way to scare them!"
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"Yeah! Let's see how they like it!"
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"Joining me now is Father Maxi, from the South Park Church."
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"Father, what do you think of all the preparations here at the docks?"
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"A celebration of the occult-eh!"
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"KoRn is a devil-worshipping group that plays violent music!"
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"we may incur the full wrath of evil!"
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"Alright, we'll see you tomorrow for Halloween!"
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"In the meantime here's a KOZY hit by Barry Manilow."
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"Come on, you guys, think! How can we scare the fifth graders?"
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"It has to be something reeaally scary."
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"Well, come on! We can think of something better than stupid pirate ghosts!"
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"When are we gonna get to the gig? I'm starving."
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"Don't think about it. We'll just keep playing our game. Raady?"
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"I spy with my little eye something that begins with the letter T!"
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"I know! A t-ree!"
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"You've got it. I spy with my little eye"
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"something that begins with the letter R."
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"- A road? - That's it!"
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"Mom! You got the new Duffy's catalog!"
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"I-I'm gonna circle everything I want for Christmas, okay?"
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"Mom, mom! You wanna see what I want for Christmas?"
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"Mom, seriously!"
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"Oh, that's not funny, boys. Eric isn't fat, his big-boned."
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"He must have a huge bone in his ass, then."
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"God, I hate you guys!"
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"Okay, so we figured out how to scare the fifth graders."
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"- How? - What's the scariest thing we could get?"
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"- Spooky spider? - No! A dead body."
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"You mean, we make something that looks like a dead body?"
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"Yeah, fatass, it has to be real to be scary!"
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"We're gonna dig up Kyle's dead grandma."
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"Yeah, fatass, we're goona dig up..."
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"Dig up Kyle's dead grandma?"
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"Dude! We'er not digging up my grandma; I'll get in trouble."
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"Think about it: if your grandma knew that she could help you,"
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"even in death, she would want to."
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"This is gonna be fun!"
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"Just hear those sleigh bells jingle-in', ring ting tingle-in' too."
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"Outside it's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you, and you, and you."
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"We have to be quiet, or else we're gonna get busted!"
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"- Well, let's dig 'er up! - Wait. I don't know if this is cool."
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"Hi, Kyle."
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"Have you been a good boy, Kyle? Have you been making Grandma proud?"
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"- Dammit, Cartman, that's not funny! - Eheh, yes, it ihis, heh."
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"Heh heh, I'm sweet."
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"Alright, alright, let's get this over with so we can put her back!"
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"Okay. Let's just hide her here, and tomorrow, during the Halloween party"
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"we'll come back in our costumes and use her to scare the fifth graders."
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"How exactly are we gonna use her to scare them?"
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"We could shove a stick up her ass and use her like a puppet!"
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"Dude, not cool. This is scary."
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"What are you guys doing out here?"
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"Yeah. They're tryin' to scare everybody 'cause they're gay wads."
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"Oh, swell. We're supposed to play here tomorrow. Do you know where the stage is?"
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"- Yeah, dude. It's right over there. - O-kay!"
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"Oh, hi. We're KoRn. We're supposed to play the Halloween concert tomorrow."
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"Groovy! Could you show us where to set up?"
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"Alright, let's just set her over here behind these boxes."
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"when the Halloween party gets going, we'll bust out dead Grandma! Let's go!"
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"You're not gonna win the costume contest!"
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"Yesterday I got this huge package in the mail, and it was big, okay?"
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"Hold on, kids."
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"We're from Mt. Peaceful Cemetery. Could we have a word with you?"
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"What is it?"
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"Dug her up? Why?"
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"Somebody's probably making love to her corpse as we speak."
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"Every vile position, every disrespectful act imaginable."
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"Yes. By now he's probably even removed her eyes"
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"and made love to the empty sockets as well."
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"that your mother's body would be stiff and dry,"
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"so he would have to have it soaked in warm water"
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"for several hours before making love to it."
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"- Yes. And, now for the difficult part. - Brace yourself."
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"leaving her to look something like an over loved hunk of Swiss cheese. She probably..."
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"Yeah, I guess, maybe, you might wanna call the police or something."
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"Package delivery for Mrs. Cartman?"
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"A package? Oh, really?"
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"Sign heah, and heah, and heah."
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"That's good, I'll rewrap it later!"
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"Oh, sweet! Life-sized blow-up Antonio Banderas love doll!"
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"With realistic geni-ta-lia."
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"Oh, this kicks ass! What a cool Christmas present my mom got!"
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"It's Halloween day, so come on down to the docks and bring your costumes!"
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"Where's Kenny? He said he had the best Halloween costume ever."
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"You guys didn't get one."
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"Where's your costume, fatass?"
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"Screw Halloween, I already got my Christmas present!"
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"I'll act all, like, surprised, like:"
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"Hey, guys. Uh, check out this kick-ass cool costume."
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"- Nno Grandma. - No Grandma?"
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"- Nno Grandma. - She's not here! - She has to be here!"
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"Well, she's not here! That's just great!"
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"but first we just need to inform you about thee people or persons out there"
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"digging up bodies to have sex with them. Gentlemen?"
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"That's it, folks. Now, we can all go to the docks and enjoy the Halloween Haunt."
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"Noo! Don't go to the docks!"
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"I'm Captain Bly!"
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"We won't warn ya again! Stay away from our docks!"
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"When you allow bands like KoRn to come to town"
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"Great rehearsal, gang. That was really groovy."
South Park
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