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Clips from The Simpsons - Homer the Smithers (S07E07)

"Uh-huh. But this is the chair, right?"
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"Your new duties will include answering Mr. Burns's phone..."
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"preparing his tax return, moistening his eyeballs..."
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"assisting with his chewing and swallowing..."
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"lying to Congress and some light typing."
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"Montgomery Burns's office."
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"Oh, hello, Mrs. Burns. I'll see if your son is available."
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"Mr. Burns has a mother? She must be a hundred million years old."
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"She has limited capacities. All she can do is dial and yell."
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"He's in a very important meeting and can't be disturbed."
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"Mr. Burns can't stand talking to his mother."
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"Taft, you old dog."
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"Really, Smithers, I'll be fine."
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"- Who is he anyway? - Uh, Homer Simpson, sir."
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"All the recent events of your life..."
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"Simpson, eh?"
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"Uh, Mr. Smithers.!"
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"I don't understand 2,700 of my new duties."
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"Um, what do I do in case of fire?"
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"Sorry. Can't hear you. Bye."
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"Aw! Just my luck."
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"Good Lord, Smithers!"
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"You look atrocious. I thought I told you to take a vacation."
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"Smithers already left, sir. I'm his replacement- Homer Simpson."
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"Ah, yes. Simpson. I'll have my lunch now."
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"A single pillow of shredded wheat..."
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"some steamed toast and a dodo egg."
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"- But I think the dodo went extinct- - Get going!"
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"And answer those phones, install the computer system..."
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"and rotate my office so the window faces the hills."
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"Uh-huh, uh-huh. Okay."
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"Um, can you repeat the part of the stuff..."
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"where you said all about the... things?"
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"Uh, the things?"
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"Lousy two-legged pants."
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"Homie, it's 4:30 in the morning."
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"Little Rascals isn't on till 6:00."
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"Oh, poor Homie."
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"Poor, poor-"
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"Hmm. One of these must be a breakfast maker."
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"Well, it's my job to cook him breakfast..."
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"and I'm gonna cook the best damn breakfast he ever ate."
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"Hmm."
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"Hmm."
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"Doughnuts? I told you I don't like ethnic food."
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"Uh, they all won."
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"I believe I'll get up."
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"Scrub harder."
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"Got to get that layer of dead skin off."
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"Simpson."
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"- Did you get that report on the accounting department? - Yes, sir, I did."
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""The accounting department is located on the third floor."
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"Its hours are 9:00 a. m. to 5:00 p. m.""
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"The head of this department is a Mr. Johnson orJohnstone."
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"Here are your messages. "You have 30 minutes to move your car. ""
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""Your car has been crushed into a cube. ""
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""You have 30 minutes to move your cube. ""
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"- Y'ello. Mr. Burns's office. - Is it about my cube?"
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"It's Mr. Smithers. He's calling for you."
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"How's everything going there, sir? Heh."
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"I have a lot of free time on my hands."
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"If you FedEx me your mail, I'd be happy to open it and return it to you."
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"Everything's fine, Smithers."
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"I've never seen anything quite like it. Anyhoo, you just enjoy your vacation."
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"Look alive, Simpson! I'm not paying you to goldbrick."
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"Yes! Yes, sir!"
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"Get cracking on my long division, and don't forget to show your work, Simpson."
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"I'll have it on your desk in the morning, sir."
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"Bart! Leave Simpson alone."
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"- Simpson, I need a ride to the library. - Yes, sir."
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"Kids! Stop exploiting your father."
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"Homie, why don't you lie down and relax?"
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"No time, Marge. I think Mr. Burns wants me to do some long division."
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"Simpson! Lie down!"
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"Simpson.!"
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"The telephone has been ringing for some time."
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"Answer it."
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"Y'ello. It's for you."
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""Relax"] - Mr. Burns- 48 rings. Are you all right?"
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"What did Simpson do to you?"
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"Do? Nothing other than drive me to distraction with his incompetent boobery."
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"But I'm not really free to talk right now."
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"Look. Stop calling me and start enjoying your vacation."
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"Remember, I want to see lots of pictures when you get back."
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"Oop. I gotta go now. There's a line forming behind me."
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"Sixty watts?"
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"What do you think this is, a tanning salon?"
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"I asked for light starch on my nightcap!"
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"You call this Postum?"
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"You call this a tax return?"
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"You call this a supercomputer?"
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"D'egh! G'yah! D'oh!"
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"You're a travesty of a f- joke of an assistant!"
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"Is there something wrong, Homie?"
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"- No. - Except-"
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"Except... I killed Mr. Burns!"
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"- What happened, Dad? - I punched Burns right in his 104-year-old face."
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"Are you sure he's dead? Maybe you just really, really hurt him."
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"Okay. Maybe everything's all right."
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"Maybe, if you go apologize, he won't even fire you... if he's alive."
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"Mr. Burns?"
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"I'm really sorry I hit you, Mr. Burns."
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"Here. Let me put some salt on that eye."
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"No! Please! I can't bear another thrashing."
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"Must... call... Smithers."
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"Doesn't seem to be any trick to it. Let's see. Smithers."
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"S-M-I-T-H-E-R-S."
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"Success! It's ringing."
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"Moe's Tavern."
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"I'm looking for a Mr. Smithers, first name Waylon."
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"Oh. So you're lookin' for a Mr. Smithers, eh?"
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"First name Waylon, is it? Listen to me, you!"
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"When I catch you, I'm gonna pull out your eyes and shove 'em down your pants..."
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"so you can watch me kick the crap outta you!"
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"Okay? Then I'm gonna use your tongue to paint my boat."
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"Ooh."
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"Oh, Smithers, if only you could hear me."
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"Something tells me Mr. Burns needs me."
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"Something tells me Mr. Burns needs me."
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"Praise God. That thug has finally gone home for the day."
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