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Clips from The Simpsons - Homer's Triple Bypass (S04E04)

"Ooh. Buy three tubes of Mr. Blister..."
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"- get one free. - [Phone Ringing]"
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"Hello. Yes."
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"Homer's in the hospital! They think it's his heart!"
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"- Clear! - [ Groans ]"
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"[ Steady Beep ]"
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"Oh, Homie, I was so frightened!"
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"Marge, my whole life flashed before my eyes."
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"How'd he get that?"
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"What a voice. Young Homer is going to make me a millionaire."
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"## [ Voice Cracks, Deepens ]"
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"Hey, my voice just changed."
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"## [ Singing Tunelessly]"
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"But I'm out of the woods now, right?"
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"I mean, whatever doesn't kill me can only make me stronger."
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"Oh, no. Quite the opposite."
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"It's made you weak as a kitten. [ Chuckles ]"
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"- Coochy coochy coo! - Stop. Please stop."
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"Oh, you swing like a girl. Come on, now."
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"- Please have mercy. - Got your nose."
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"- [ Chuckling ] - Not funny."
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"No! Oh!"
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"Remember your hippopotamus oath."
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"- Can't you do something for him? - Well, we can't fix his heart..."
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"but we can tell you exactly how damaged it is."
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"What an age we live in!"
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"Now, what you see here is the radioactive dye we injected..."
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"Now, Homer, this is a new body fat analysis test."
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"I start you jiggling and measure how long it takes to stop."
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"Whoo-hoo! Look at that blubber fly!"
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"Yes."
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"Spare me your medical mumbo jumbo."
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"We're going to cut you open and tinker with your ticker."
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"- Could you dumb it down a shade? - Doctor, we'll do whatever it takes to get my Homie well."
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"Good. I must warn you though."
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"This procedure will cost you upwards of... $30,000."
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"- [Homer Gasps, Cries Out] - [Thud]"
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"No. Don't you have health insurance at work?"
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"- D'oh! - Don't worry, Marge."
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"America's health care system is second only to Japan..."
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"Now, before we give you health insurance, I have to ask you a few questions."
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"Questions? Questions? Oh!"
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"My whole scheme down the-- I mean, ask away."
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"Oh, good. Now, under "heart attacks,""
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"you crossed out "3" and wrote "0.""
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"Oh, I thought that said "brain hemorrhages.""
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"I do enjoy a snifter of port at Christmas."
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"All right. Here's your policy."
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"Now let me tell you something, Mr. Sucker. I just--"
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"Oh, hold on there. Uh, you still have to sign it."
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"Oh. I-- [ Gasps ]"
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"It's like an "X." [ Groans ]"
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"Hey, we'd better get you to a hospital."
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"Oh, Doctor, I was in a wonderful place filled with fire and brimstone."
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"I can't afford it. Maybe I should buy one of those machines."
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"Now, I know I haven't been the best Christian."
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"In fact, when you're up there "blah, blah, blah-ing,""
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"Well, anyhoo, can I have $40,000?"
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"but I rented Fiddler on the Roof, and I will watch it."
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"Now, I know I haven't been the best-- Oh, forget it."
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"Whoo-hoo! Look at it go!"
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"Hi, everybody! Are you looking for a way to slash the cost..."
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"- Boring! - Wait! This might be the answer we're looking for."
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"I will perform any operation for 1 29.95."
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"Come in for brain surgery..."
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"and receive a free Chinese finger trap."
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"[ Grunting ]"
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"Okay, friend. You tried the best. Now try the rest."
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"Call 1 -600-DOCTORB."
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"The "B" is for "bargain"!"
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"Well, Marge, we could do worse."
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"- How? - Uh, some dog could do the operation."
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"Nothing you say can upset us. We're the MTV generation."
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"Dad, are you trying to tell us you're getting a coronary artery bypass graft?"
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"[ Sobbing ]"
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"Kids. Kids. I'm not gonna die."
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"Uh-- He sold poisoned milk to schoolchildren."
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"- Homer! - Hey, I'm just trying to make it easier on 'em."
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"Bed goes up. Bed goes down."
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"- Bed goes up. Bed goes down. - [Flanders]Homer Simpson!"
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"Well, if that don't put the "dink" in co-inky-dink."
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"Flanders, what are you doin' here?"
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"I'm having a kidney and a lung removed."
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"Dr. Riviera. Dr. Nick Riviera. Please report to the coroner immediately."
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"- [ All Chattering ] - Where are the bodies?"
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"Oh, such a nice day. I think I'll go out the window."
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"- Ho! - [Objects Clattering]"
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"Dear Lord, I'm really scared about this operation tomorrow."
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"If something happens, please look after Marge..."
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"Well, if he's been good, he'll go to heaven."
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"In heaven, you get to do Whatever you like best all the time."
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"Cloud goes up. Cloud goes down."
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"Hey, hey! [ Chuckling ]"
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"- Krusty, why are you here? - Eh, it's part of my public service..."
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"for my glug-glug, vroom-vroom, thump-thump."
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"Oh. Well, I could use a good laugh."
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"I know. I'm in the zipper club myself."
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"Yeah? Well, I got news for ya. This ain't makeup."
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"They say the greatest tragedy is when a father outlives his son."
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"I've never fully understood why that is."
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"Frankly, I can see an upside to it. [ Laughing ]"
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"When I first heard about the operation, I was against it."
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"But then I thought, if Homer wants to be a woman, so be it."
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"What? Well, what the hell am I supposed to do..."
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"with this jumbo thong bikini?"
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"Uh, Homer, I snuck you in a beer for old times' sake."
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"Uh, you know, Homer, that beer ain't free."
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"Mom, this is fascinating."
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"No, Mom. It's very reassuring."
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"- [ Groans ] - [Man]Insert the retractor..."
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"and crank it until the ribs swing open like a rusty drawbridge."
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"- [ Bones Cracking ] - Ah! No! Blood! Ugh!"
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"Next, make an incision in the coronary artery--"
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"- Yes, and a new ca-- No! - [People Laughing]"
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"Oh, my little Maggie."
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"Now, Marge, if the unthinkable should happen, you're gonna be lonely--"
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"- Oh, I'm no good at this. - [ Whispering ]"
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"[ Whispering ]"
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"- Hi, everybody! - Hi, Dr. Nick!"
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"let's not get the law involved."
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