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Clips from South Park - Conjoined Fetus Lady (S02E02)

"I want to invite your nurse to a dinner party at my house this evening."
South Park
"I'd appreciate if both you and Mr.Mackey would attend."
South Park
"- Wonderful! - Now you did say she has a fetus, on her head?"
South Park
"Ok children, now who's gonna win the state finals?"
South Park
"- Denver? - Here we go cows, here we go, uh-uh."
South Park
"- I think we need to get off on this exit. - Sit down kid!!!"
South Park
"- But it's quicker to get to the Denver school that way! - Do you want an office referal?"
South Park
"You can't give me an office referal."
South Park
"I'm Chef, coach of the South Park cows."
South Park
"Well I certainly wanna thank you for bringing your team down."
South Park
"Apparently nobody else would play us, because they knew we'd just beat 'em silly."
South Park
"and here you are. You're from South Park, yeah? - Yeah."
South Park
"My god, amazing where people can live nowadays."
South Park
"Well we might as well get this overwith, we gotta start thinking about D.C."
South Park
"Play ball!"
South Park
"Alright boys, just 5 more of the little bastards to go."
South Park
"- South Park on offense! - Great job children! Just stay focused now."
South Park
"- Go for it, Pip. - Oh bother."
South Park
"Come on you Frenchie little frog!"
South Park
"Great shot Pip!"
South Park
"Yeah, but it doesn't matter. The Denver team always wins, mmkay."
South Park
"- Please, forgive us, I'm terribly sorry Nurse Gollum. - No, I'm quite secure with it."
South Park
"Joking is a way for them to come to terms with what they don't understand."
South Park
"Could I get some more pork?"
South Park
"So did you ever think of you just you know, having it cut off?"
South Park
"Yes! We could get you a few hats, and you could wear a different one every day."
South Park
"I'm a pretty happy person."
South Park
"Got it! We could set aside a whole week to make the public aware of folks just like you!"
South Park
"Oh yes, a conjoined twin myslexia awareness week. You know that has a nice ring."
South Park
"You got just one more Pip. You get this kid, and we are state champions."
South Park
"Yeah, and if you don't you're a big dumbass European hippie piece of crap."
South Park
"Get 'em, Frenchie!"
South Park
"Oh sorry about wooping yo ass there, coach."
South Park
"Oooh baby come on, just woop give it ass."
South Park
"Mrs. Herman has opened the east wing of the library,"
South Park
"and our own South Park cows elementary school dodgeball team is going to the national finals."
South Park
"Where they will undoubtly be beaten senseless by the Washington team."
South Park
"But most importantly this week has brought to my attention a very serious and dreaded disease."
South Park
"Conjoined twin myslexia."
South Park
"And so it is in honor of this that I declare this exciting week as..."
South Park
""Conjoined Twin Myslexia Week"."
South Park
"And now let's kick off our week long festivities with the first anual grand conjoined parade!"
South Park
"What a glorious parade that was. Let's hear it for the parade coordinators!"
South Park
"You know Mayor, I really should be accompanying those kids to"
South Park
"Washington incase hey get hurt. That is my job."
South Park
"Nonsense. This is your week, you aren't going anywhere."
South Park
"- How much further is Washington DC? - Sit down, kid!!!"
South Park
"- I need to know how far it is, lady. - I said SIT DOWN!!!!!"
South Park
"- I got a jelly roll! I got a jelly roll! - Sweet! Jelly roll's perfect!"
South Park
"Places."
South Park
"Damn man. This is the bigtime alright."
South Park
"- Chef, we're hungry. - You can eat after the game."
South Park
"You children win this one and you're national champions."
South Park
"Then you can go on and play the Chinese."
South Park
"My mom says there's a lot of black people in China."
South Park
"- What? - Are you Chef?"
South Park
"The Washington team has forfitted the game. Congradulations, you're national champions."
South Park
"What? We did it! Children we won!"
South Park
"- Hey, why did you guys forfit? - You mean you don't know?"
South Park
"Last year's national champions were the Austin Pirates."
South Park
"They played China for the world championship."
South Park
"Only 4 of them came back alive. Chinese dodgeball players aren't like us."
South Park
"They do nothing but dodgeball. Day in and day out."
South Park
"They use steroids and training equipment to make them not kids, but animals."
South Park
"- Well good luck, we've got our futures to think about. - Ok, children, back in the bus."
South Park
"And so as we have this honorary dinner, we take a look back at Nurse Gollum,"
South Park
"and the brave life she has lived."
South Park
"You've got the strength, you've got the courage."
South Park
"Oh, that was so touching."
South Park
"And now friends, it's time to present lifetime conjoined twin achievement award."
South Park
"This award goes to outstanding conjoined twins who have made a mark on society."
South Park
"- And the winner is... - Nurse Gollum."
South Park
"- Oh boy. - Excuse me Mayor, but I just received some news that you might all be interested in."
South Park
"Our South Park cows have just beaten the Washington dodgeball team,"
South Park
"- But Chef we don't wanna play the Chinese!"
South Park
"Nonsense! If we win this one, we're world champions."
South Park
"- But we could get killed! - And just what price would you pay for you trying to blow it."
South Park
"Just imagine and big yellow dodgeball champions bear hanging in the cafeteria. Imagine it!"
South Park
"- Dude, Chef has lost it. - You'll be on the news all over the world."
South Park
"South Park will finally have a sport that it's good at. Ooh children, it'll be glorious."
South Park
"- Dude, what does that mean? - I don't know."
South Park
"- Hey isn't that kid Kevin Chinese? - Yeah, you're from China."
South Park
"- No, I'm from America. My parents are Chinese. - Tell us how the Chinese play dodgeball!"
South Park
"Hey, hey, hey! Children, that's not cool."
South Park
"You don't make fun of somebody because of their ethnicity."
South Park
"You see it's not ok to make fun of an American because they're black brown or whatever."
South Park
"But it is ok to make fun of foreigners because they're from another country."
South Park
"Let the world champion of dodgeball be decided."
South Park
"Damn dude, China's fucked up."
South Park
"Yeah good thing they have those big eyes so they"
South Park
"don't have to rely on that amazing American intellect"
South Park
"Pray bra!"
South Park
"God damn!"
South Park
"Hey, hey, what do you call a white American person with a PHD in physics and math?"
South Park
"- I don't know, wrat? - Stupid American!"
South Park
"It's number, oh I don't know. All Americans look alike."
South Park
"- Oh my god! They killed Kenny. - You... bastards..."
South Park
"Dude that is not cool. You're gonna get us into trouble again."
South Park
"Ladies and gentlemen on this 4th day of cojoined twin myslexia week"
South Park
"Now join me in saluting our cows and help make Nurse Gollum not feel like an outcast"
South Park
"with our first official conjoined twin myslexia hats!"
South Park
"And there is only one more South Park player left."
South Park
"Still all Chinese players. This simply all is very sorry."
South Park
"- Come on! Throw ball! - Hey you want to head my impersonation of American?"
South Park
"Do you have any non dairy creamer?"
South Park
"If we had won the world championship, what then?"
South Park
"It would only be a bigger let down next year if we didn't win."
South Park
"Our lives would have to revolve around dodgeball. Our lives were fine before."
South Park
"Come on. Forget this stupid game. Let's go home."
South Park
"What's the matter Frenchie, you got crepes in your ears?"
South Park
"And the winner is South Park cows."
South Park
"Everyone, everyone look! I won the game! We're world champions!"
South Park
"Mr.Chef, Mr.Chef, South Park is the world champion in dodgeball. Oh glorious day!"
South Park
"- Shut up, Pip. - Yeah, shut up Pip. Can we go home now?"
South Park
"- Did you all see? I can't believe I threw such a ball with my own arm. It was... - SHUT UP PIP!"
South Park
"I would like to personally thank all of you for your enthusiastic cooperation."
South Park
"Now let's head it one more time for our world champions South Park Cows!"
South Park
"- What the hell is everyone wearing on their heads? - And now, let's hear from the woman of the week,"
South Park
"the incredible, courageous, Nurse Gollum!"
South Park
"Damn it Kyle. We've been working all week against that kind of behavior."
South Park
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