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Clips from Louie (2010) - A La Carte (S05E05)

"They'll let you. No, no, no, no, no, no."
Louie (2010)
"It'll only take a second to check the price."
Louie (2010)
"Just get candy, get candy."
Louie (2010)
"Please, please. Please hurry."
Louie (2010)
"No, no, no bathroom."
Louie (2010)
"No, there's no bathroom."
Louie (2010)
"Please, listen, it's an emergency!"
Louie (2010)
"Okay, okay, okay. No."
Louie (2010)
"All right."
Louie (2010)
"Come on, be strong. You can do it!"
Louie (2010)
"You can do it."
Louie (2010)
"Come on!"
Louie (2010)
"I know I'm not gonna make it"
Louie (2010)
"Daddy! Jane, be strong!"
Louie (2010)
"Just go way, way-- Don't look at me!"
Louie (2010)
"It's gonna be okay, Jane, okay?"
Louie (2010)
"And, uh, it was good."
Louie (2010)
"Louie, Louie."
Louie (2010)
"What do you need? Look, I got an open mic."
Louie (2010)
"Can you-- can you host it for me?"
Louie (2010)
"and then you, eh, you go home."
Louie (2010)
"I gotta go, I got somewhere to go."
Louie (2010)
"All right, fine, 500."
Louie (2010)
"All right, 400."
Louie (2010)
"All right, here. Thanks."
Louie (2010)
"You guys are here for the, uh, open mic?"
Louie (2010)
"Okay, here's how it's gonna work."
Louie (2010)
"I wish there was a camera on the inside of my head"
Louie (2010)
"and we could project it onto the wall..."
Louie (2010)
"and then we wouldn't have to do anything."
Louie (2010)
"Hey!"
Louie (2010)
"Thank you very much. Welcome!"
Louie (2010)
"Open mic night is where we--"
Louie (2010)
"It's a-- Anybody can get on stage."
Louie (2010)
"Uh, and that's it. We're gonna--"
Louie (2010)
"These-- Okay..."
Louie (2010)
"Thank you for that. So, let's start our show"
Louie (2010)
"Give him a hand, please."
Louie (2010)
"Thank you, Louie. Yeah, good luck, man."
Louie (2010)
"Okay. What's wrong?"
Louie (2010)
"Could you watch me and then give me a critique?"
Louie (2010)
"Oh, dude, I don't--"
Louie (2010)
"You-- you don't-- you don't--"
Louie (2010)
"so give him a little help, make him feel good, please."
Louie (2010)
"I used to urinate in my bed."
Louie (2010)
"Hi. Hey."
Louie (2010)
"Bart. Yeah."
Louie (2010)
"Well..."
Louie (2010)
"All right, come on. Come on."
Louie (2010)
"I don't know-- I don't know what to tell you, Bart."
Louie (2010)
"What makes me laugh?"
Louie (2010)
"Buster Keaton, Lucille Ball."
Louie (2010)
"Okay..."
Louie (2010)
"I'm sorry, and I--"
Louie (2010)
"And... you gotta get out."
Louie (2010)
"You gotta save yourself some pain."
Louie (2010)
"Oh, shit."
Louie (2010)
"Is there anything you can tell me"
Louie (2010)
"A funny voice?"
Louie (2010)
"black and white movie about divorce, can we?"
Louie (2010)
"All right, forget it. Let's just not go."
Louie (2010)
"Oh, my God!"
Louie (2010)
"Make a case."
Louie (2010)
"Really?"
Louie (2010)
"Like, I remember this one time..."
Louie (2010)
"But... I was gonna--"
Louie (2010)
"Let's make the most of it."
Louie (2010)
"What are you-- what are you doing?"
Louie (2010)
"What are you doing? I'm not doing anything."
Louie (2010)
"You are. What?"
Louie (2010)
"Yes, you are."
Louie (2010)
"Tell me what you want me to do"
Louie (2010)
"Oh, my God!"
Louie (2010)
"Jesus!"
Louie (2010)
"Come on, put your dick away."
Louie (2010)
"there's a gun behind the toilet."
Louie (2010)
"Certo, signora."
Louie (2010)
"It's so good."
Louie (2010)
"like, a few seconds ago..."
Louie (2010)
"and now that you said that,"
Louie (2010)
"So are you glad that you said that now,"
Louie (2010)
"Okay, so what, are we supposed to"
Louie (2010)
"Because scary is fun-ruining, and I like fun."
Louie (2010)
"Not at all."
Louie (2010)
"I had a kid with a guy, it was awful."
Louie (2010)
"Didn't we learn anything?"
Louie (2010)
"How about another road?"
Louie (2010)
"How many couples who were married,"
Louie (2010)
"if they hadn't married,"
Louie (2010)
"But, guess what?"
Louie (2010)
"I love you, right now."
Louie (2010)
"But I do know"
Louie (2010)
"What's wrong with that?"
Louie (2010)
"who have a good time together"
Louie (2010)
"in a bunch of ladies' strange holes?"
Louie (2010)
"Jesus Christ."
Louie (2010)
"Don't you?"
Louie (2010)
"Well, do you want to--"
Louie (2010)
"Wow."
Louie (2010)
"Look at that lady over there."
Louie (2010)
"Look at her."
Louie (2010)
"Look at the meatballs under her neck."
Louie (2010)
"all over them and just be like..."
Louie (2010)
"See, I don't have tits like that,"
Louie (2010)
"Look..."
Louie (2010)
"I mean, let's not waste what we got left on each other."
Louie (2010)
"what jokes I'm gonna do tonight."
Louie (2010)
"That's in South Carolina, actually."
Louie (2010)
"Eww, no! No. No, no."
Louie (2010)
"Dad, we hate those."
Louie (2010)
"Yeah, that's why I get them,"
Louie (2010)
"If I get the ones you like, they'll be gone in a day."
Louie (2010)
"That's really depressing."
Louie (2010)
"I know, my mom did the same thing."
Louie (2010)
"Sorry."
Louie (2010)
"You okay, Daddy? Yeah, I'm okay."
Louie (2010)
"Do you have to poop right now?"
Louie (2010)
"Dad, just go in the store."
Louie (2010)
"Daddy can't poop in public."
Louie (2010)
"Do you know the price of this?"
Louie (2010)
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