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Clips from How I Met Your Mother - The Fortress (S08E08)

"I was checking out some mole people's graffiti art..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Mmm. Mwah. Bisou, bisou."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, what a cute baby. What's his name?"
How I Met Your Mother
"- Marvin. - For my father."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, that's so sweet."
How I Met Your Mother
"- [Laughing] Oh, actually they're not... - Yes, we have."
How I Met Your Mother
"- What? - My husband, Emsbury, and I just love this area."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'm a cricket player who secretly hates his life."
How I Met Your Mother
"- What are you doing? - Well, you were late yet again..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and so I'm gonna do this little scene study with Ted."
How I Met Your Mother
"Why? Because he's there for me."
How I Met Your Mother
"That's going a little far to prove your point, isn't it?"
How I Met Your Mother
"the only reason gay people get married is to prove a point."
How I Met Your Mother
"- I didn't... That's not what I... - Thank you, sister."
How I Met Your Mother
"Somebody needs to get this lady's mind a rearview mirror..."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Snapping Fingers]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Hate is a four-letter word."
How I Met Your Mother
"I didn't... I voted for..."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Oh, is this part of a security system? - Sort of."
How I Met Your Mother
"It's connected to the welcome mat. You see..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Let's say the young lady you're bringing home is dressed for winter."
How I Met Your Mother
"Under those layers, an unwelcome surprise could await you."
How I Met Your Mother
"by Stinson... patent pending."
How I Met Your Mother
"'Cause there's only one kind of chubby you want in the bedroom."
How I Met Your Mother
"Am I right, people? [Laughs]"
How I Met Your Mother
"but I think if you keep letting him nap, he's gonna be up all night."
How I Met Your Mother
"Funny. You sound like someone who's been around for his bedtime lately."
How I Met Your Mother
"Uh, can somebody get this lady a storefront?"
How I Met Your Mother
"'Cause she needs to mind her own business, mm'kay?"
How I Met Your Mother
"- [Applause] - Would you stop it?"
How I Met Your Mother
"You know what's not a choice? Being gay for this kitchen."
How I Met Your Mother
"That came out wrong. The point is, let's focus on this awesome apartment."
How I Met Your Mother
"You're right. [Gasps]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Look at that fabulous plasma television."
How I Met Your Mother
"My ex-husband... who never supported my career..."
How I Met Your Mother
"would love to watch the Vikings..."
How I Met Your Mother
"never win a Super Bowl in franchise history on that thing."
How I Met Your Mother
"- How dare you. - Don't let her push your buttons."
How I Met Your Mother
"Right."
How I Met Your Mother
"I don't care about football."
How I Met Your Mother
"Woodworthy Manor fan."
How I Met Your Mother
"I very much enjoyed watching it the other night..."
How I Met Your Mother
"- [Gasps] - With Emsbury."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Oh, you didn't. - Yeah. Oh, yeah."
How I Met Your Mother
"I know who deliberately overwatered Lady Chillsbury's prize-winning roses."
How I Met Your Mother
"They have been building to that reveal all season, Marshall."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Don't you tell me... - It was Parson Smallsby."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Gasping, Squealing]"
How I Met Your Mother
"- Wow! Great view. - And customizable."
How I Met Your Mother
"Let's say you promised a girl a surprise trip..."
How I Met Your Mother
"to the most romantic place on earth."
How I Met Your Mother
"No peeking."
How I Met Your Mother
"Wow, we must've gone far."
How I Met Your Mother
"We were on your private jet for, like, six hours."
How I Met Your Mother
"Well, you definitely weren't on a bus to Delaware and back wearing earplugs..."
How I Met Your Mother
"- I'll tell you that much. - [Laughs]"
How I Met Your Mother
"And I think you'll agree it was worth the wait once you see the view."
How I Met Your Mother
"Et voilà, ma chérie."
How I Met Your Mother
"You flew me to Vegas?"
How I Met Your Mother
"- [Laughing] - It's, uh... It's Par..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Well, hey, whatever works. Whatever... Mmm."
How I Met Your Mother
"by Stinson... patent pending."
How I Met Your Mother
"No, I'm not. I'm just trying to show off all of its one-of-a-kind features."
How I Met Your Mother
"See... See, there's also, uh, Venice..."
How I Met Your Mother
"African safari."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, and my favorite."
How I Met Your Mother
"Huh?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Nothing gets a girl to go from on the fence to on all fours..."
How I Met Your Mother
"faster than thinking everyone she's ever held dear is a glowing pile of ash."
How I Met Your Mother
"Mushroom cloud five."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Imitates Explosion]"
How I Met Your Mother
"I love your accent."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Laughs] You are adorable."
How I Met Your Mother
"Well, aren't you ducky?"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Laughs] Seriously, if you were straight, I'd be all over you."
How I Met Your Mother
"Huh."
How I Met Your Mother
"- What's this? - Oh, God."
How I Met Your Mother
"Only the best thing ever."
How I Met Your Mother
"- [No Audible Dialogue] - But now she's turning into a bit of a morning-after pill."
How I Met Your Mother
"See? We need to extend the chute and add a landing spot."
How I Met Your Mother
"No, I said "dressing the dummy" was a waste of time."
How I Met Your Mother
"The Escape from Bitch Mountain..."
How I Met Your Mother
"by Stinson... patent pending."
How I Met Your Mother
"Okay. He's kidding. It's just, you know, in case of fire."
How I Met Your Mother
"No, but I'm glad you mentioned fire."
How I Met Your Mother
"See those smoke detectors?"
How I Met Your Mother
""I'm looking for a deeper commitment.""
How I Met Your Mother
"and "I'm a week late.""
How I Met Your Mother
"Look, just stop talking."
How I Met Your Mother
"We've made up our minds."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, well, thanks for taking a look. I'll walk you out."
How I Met Your Mother
"- [Man] We'll take it. - [Robin Gasps]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Yes! Yes! ♪♪ [Vocalizes]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Trouble in paradise?"
How I Met Your Mother
"We have a child together."
How I Met Your Mother
"I can't believe you watched Woodworthy Manor without me."
How I Met Your Mother
"If I get blinded in one eye by a badminton shuttlecock..."
How I Met Your Mother
"you might as well call me Lord Esterbrooke."
How I Met Your Mother
"- [Both Gasp] - You watched the new one without me?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Betrayal stings, doesn't it, Emsbury?"
How I Met Your Mother
"- Hey. - Hey."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Listen. I... - No, me first."
How I Met Your Mother
"I've been thinking, and I realized something."
How I Met Your Mother
"The Fortress of Solitude is where Superman went to be alone..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and I never want to be alone again."
How I Met Your Mother
"But then I remembered in Superman II..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Superman gave up all his powers to be with Lois Lane..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and he was honestly kind of a vag after that."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Oh, buddy, just quit while... - Superman III was a complete train wreck. Totally."
How I Met Your Mother
"- What's your point? - [Stammers]"
How I Met Your Mother
"That I love you..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and..."
How I Met Your Mother
"And that the Superman films are uneven."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Sighs]"
How I Met Your Mother
"I really appreciate that, Barney, but..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Congrats. You guys are getting a fantastic apartment."
How I Met Your Mother
"I mean, I know some of the features are a little weird."
How I Met Your Mother
"- [Laughs] - A little?"
How I Met Your Mother
"I get it."
How I Met Your Mother
"But, I mean, some things might be worth saving."
How I Met Your Mother
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