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Clips from New Girl - Bells (S01E01)

"- Serious? - Yeah."
New Girl
"You gonna sit around all night playing "Jingle Bells"?"
New Girl
"Wonderful. Great, guys."
New Girl
"Hector. Okay, good. Big finish and we're out."
New Girl
"Desiree?"
New Girl
"It's fixed."
New Girl
"You know, I fix things just to the point of working, Schmidt."
New Girl
"Goose pimples."
New Girl
"it would mean a lot to them, and if they saw how good you are..."
New Girl
"- I can't afford a plumber. - That's what it's called."
New Girl
"- Is this a path you recently fixed? - It's called self-reliance."
New Girl
"A scissor. Really, Schmidt?"
New Girl
"- I have nothing to say to you. - Okay."
New Girl
"A week? A month? Is this my favorite bedspread all over again?"
New Girl
"- And now you bring it up like it's nothing? - I left you a check for $30."
New Girl
"Heh, heh. Tough crowd."
New Girl
"What do you mean? I make bells cool."
New Girl
"A man and his will to survive."
New Girl
"I warned y'all about these bells."
New Girl
"This has to stop. It's not my war!"
New Girl
"Fine. Stop smelling my hair."
New Girl
"- Wanna get dirty? - Yeah."
New Girl
"And I'm sorry I kicked you out of group..."
New Girl
"That's a big deal, making sure no one else gives up on them."
New Girl
"Does she want me to not care what the song sound like?"
New Girl
"Let me get my cardigan."
New Girl
"You open your mouth and I just hear, "Cardigan. I am wearing a cardigan.""
New Girl
"Mmm."
New Girl
"You know you want in on this, man. A little fatty tune."
New Girl
"A little yellow T, Cali roll."
New Girl
"Samurai snack. So scrummy."
New Girl
"I'm good. Looks like you're soloing on $80 worth of sushi, Schmidt."
New Girl
"I got the means. I get why you don't wanna get down, Nick."
New Girl
"But, Winston, you gotta climb aboard, man. You got a serious J-O-B now."
New Girl
"If you mean piece of crap, yeah, it's serious."
New Girl
"- Surprised you haven't made a game of it. - I tried."
New Girl
"I'm losing my mind, guys."
New Girl
"I sometimes touch the frayed part of the power cord just to feel something."
New Girl
"What's up, guys?"
New Girl
"- Nobody has lady guests coming over? - Lady guests?"
New Girl
"And how do you feel about opening your home..."
New Girl
"and your hearts to the youth of America?"
New Girl
"Yo, Miss Day, where should we set up these bells?"
New Girl
"Hey, girl"
New Girl
"What you doing?"
New Girl
"Hey, girl"
New Girl
"Where you going?"
New Girl
"- Who's that girl? - Who's that girl?"
New Girl
"- Who's that girl? - Who's that girl?"
New Girl
"It's Jess"
New Girl
"I'm so sorry, you guys, I should have told you..."
New Girl
"but the center decided to turn our space back into a hallway..."
New Girl
"so I had nowhere to go."
New Girl
"Is this something that a mean, creative judge made you do?"
New Girl
"This is just like a nightmare I had where you brought over teenagers with bells."
New Girl
"These kids had a choice between early-morning detention and music."
New Girl
"And they all chose music."
New Girl
"- No kidding? - Desiree, bells are not for hitting."
New Girl
"Kids wanted to play band instruments, but we got a donation of handbells..."
New Girl
"which are trés, trés dope."
New Girl
"Miss Day, can I eat some of these crackers up in here?"
New Girl
"No, no, no."
New Girl
"Water crackers are for adults to eat with adult cheese."
New Girl
"Can I eat a cracker sushi sandwich?"
New Girl
"No. Jess."
New Girl
""Jingle Bells" is a trash song played on a trash instrument."
New Girl
"And I'm not really asking permission, I'm giving you a heads-up."
New Girl
"Well, that got serious."
New Girl
"Anyway, you are gonna love these kids."
New Girl
"Thank you, Schmidt."
New Girl
"So good."
New Girl
"Just think, you could be in detention right now."
New Girl
"- Is it too late to choose detention? - We suck."
New Girl
"We don't suck, we just need a little bit of rehearsal."
New Girl
"That's what it feels like to play a song sort of together."
New Girl
"Bring it in."
New Girl
"In. Yes."
New Girl
"- Ensembell. - Ensembell!"
New Girl
"Five minutes of text time, you earned it."
New Girl
"Oh, dip. Miss Day!"
New Girl
"Miss Day. - Oh!"
New Girl
"You got a twisted toilet, Miss Day."
New Girl
"Nick, toilet situation. Code one. Water only."
New Girl
"- You didn't tell her the system? - She went rogue."
New Girl
"Turn on the faucet before you flush the toilet because it's..."
New Girl
"All right."
New Girl
"- Thank you, Nick. - All right. There we go, no problem."
New Girl
"Perfect. You did it."
New Girl
"Plastic soda bottle is right where it's supposed to be."
New Girl
"- Back in the wall hole. - What? It's fixed."
New Girl
"Heard that before."
New Girl
"It's fixed."
New Girl
"It's fixed."
New Girl
"Nick, repeat after me: "I am not the Chinese kid from Goonies.""
New Girl
"- If you want a fancy fix, just say so. - Okay."
New Girl
"Please fancy-fix the toilet."
New Girl
"That's all you had to say."
New Girl
"That actually sounds good."
New Girl
"Whoa."
New Girl
"You're amazing."
New Girl
"Look, each one a memory."
New Girl
"Winston, please help me."
New Girl
"Just hear me out. Two things women love:"
New Girl
"Alternative percussion players and role models."
New Girl
"Kids would love it and we'd get to spend time together."
New Girl
"You gotta do it. It's a mitzvah, bro."
New Girl
"- Sure you've never rung before? - Believe it or not..."
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"I've never played handbells before. I pick things up easy, that's all."
New Girl
"I know handbells aren't the coolest instrument..."
New Girl
"they might not even be the fifth coolest, but the kids would love it..."
New Girl
"they'd really get into it and maybe try a bit harder."
New Girl
"Also, there's, like, a lot of potentially cool..."
New Girl
"like, bell shorthand we could use to talk about Nick."
New Girl
"While he's right there, we'll be like, "Nick is such a tinkle.""
New Girl
""He's more like a tonkel.""
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""Tinkle' and "tonkel" are potential bell talk we could use."
New Girl
"- I get it. Just be cool, please. - I am cool."
New Girl
"Before you make your decision..."
New Girl
"I'd only need you till the concert on Sunday."
New Girl
"- I don't know, I think I could be into this. - Yay."
New Girl
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