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Clips from Archer (2009) - Animation (S05E05)

"he's crippled, Pam --"
Archer (2009)
"Hey Pam, relax, breathe you're doing fine..."
Archer (2009)
"you're probably gonna wanna try to minimize the sweating."
Archer (2009)
"Yeah, just think cool thoughts. Like eating mint"
Archer (2009)
"At the morgue."
Archer (2009)
"I'm pretty darn excited to be practicing law again."
Archer (2009)
"I mean, hopefully I won't have to defend anybody in court,"
Archer (2009)
"but -- But there's always"
Archer (2009)
"a witness to coerce, a judge to bribe..."
Archer (2009)
"Bribe with what? The government seized the"
Archer (2009)
"Wh-? Money laundering, you ass!"
Archer (2009)
"Oh, you mean as a front, because a laundromat"
Archer (2009)
"Yeah, I'm hoping the mattresses"
Archer (2009)
"are just mildewy, and not... Mildewy and dead-hookery."
Archer (2009)
"No, not the room. These."
Archer (2009)
"- thing people know about! - Yeah after six weeks,"
Archer (2009)
"- but for dogs that are poor. - Archer!"
Archer (2009)
"- What, smell it. - Shut up, look"
Archer (2009)
"secret agents in the world..."
Archer (2009)
"- We were rogues. - Potato, puh-treason,"
Archer (2009)
"whatever, but we've been up against terrorists,"
Archer (2009)
"- cyborgs, help me out... - Space pirates..."
Archer (2009)
"Oh my God, I forgot about the space pirates!"
Archer (2009)
"of skills -- Pam, legs!"
Archer (2009)
"-- and since the government has unjustly accused us"
Archer (2009)
"those skills from espionage to criminal activity,"
Archer (2009)
"And you're okay with that."
Archer (2009)
"meets Scarface! That makes me..."
Archer (2009)
"- Archer? - He's okay!"
Archer (2009)
"He's okay don't come in here don't come in here he's okay!"
Archer (2009)
"I said don't come in here!"
Archer (2009)
"No, I'm honestly not judging you..."
Archer (2009)
"So, um, are you hearing your words?"
Archer (2009)
"Oh okay so I should take life advice from"
Archer (2009)
"With a dirty car?!"
Archer (2009)
"- Is he dead? - No."
Archer (2009)
"- He looks dead. - He's not."
Archer (2009)
"Mis amigas, por favor!"
Archer (2009)
"- Unghh... - Is he a zombie?"
Archer (2009)
"Sh-shut your h-hole, am I d-dying?"
Archer (2009)
"- She insisted. - So we could unfreeze"
Archer (2009)
"you in the future, once medical science had"
Archer (2009)
"developed a cure for... headsmash."
Archer (2009)
"After Fidel's hitmen try to kill me --"
Archer (2009)
"Ugh, Charles and Rudi, those dicks."
Archer (2009)
"Anyway! I go into hiding, change my name,"
Archer (2009)
"and -- Hey, how is your mother?"
Archer (2009)
"Pff, como siempre. Y la tuya?"
Archer (2009)
"So, she telephone me, ask if I know some maybe people,"
Archer (2009)
"I say yes, I know some maybe people,"
Archer (2009)
"- and here we are. - And, sorry,"
Archer (2009)
"you're getting out of this maybe what?"
Archer (2009)
"- Oh. - Because I want to buy"
Archer (2009)
"that place..."
Archer (2009)
"Archer, what're you -- Lana, we're gonna need"
Archer (2009)
"- been together, or...? - It was a mission, Lana!"
Archer (2009)
"Ramón's Latino, so he's comfortable"
Archer (2009)
"- Although I am. - So go ahead, Lana,"
Archer (2009)
"- judge away! - Right?"
Archer (2009)
"I -- Pam shut up, and Archer you know better,"
Archer (2009)
"I don't care about that. What I do care about are"
Archer (2009)
"Lana, Ramón vouches for them, I vouch for him,"
Archer (2009)
"I know that?! I know it's bad,"
Archer (2009)
"the number one country music singer in all of America,"
Archer (2009)
"- and some of Canada! - Well,"
Archer (2009)
"- Wait, seriously? - Yes,"
Archer (2009)
"they were very clear, no guns."
Archer (2009)
"But -- I gave mi palabra."
Archer (2009)
"If anything goes wrong I'm holding you responsible."
Archer (2009)
"- Yeah, that'll teach me. - Tough day, huh?"
Archer (2009)
"The high point was getting shot at."
Archer (2009)
"she could be anything, a world traveler,"
Archer (2009)
"to be a country singer so badly? Besides being clinically insane."
Archer (2009)
"Yeah. Here's to the crazy ones."
Archer (2009)
"- Um... - Ugh, díos mio,"
Archer (2009)
"- that stinks! - It's not that bad!"
Archer (2009)
"- Charles and Rudi?! - Wait, the hitmen?!"
Archer (2009)
"Tranquilo, tranquilo! It's okay!"
Archer (2009)
"- What?! - Well..."
Archer (2009)
"And how is that tone necessary?"
Archer (2009)
"- Thank you. - It's a fork."
Archer (2009)
"And there were two of each color and you know this"
Archer (2009)
"as well as me because we stood in my kitchen and counted."
Archer (2009)
"Well then I apologize, and I'll be happy"
Archer (2009)
"to throw in another... five dollars?"
Archer (2009)
"You can't buy only one blue fork,"
Archer (2009)
"- you have to buy the whole set! - Oh, that is such --"
Archer (2009)
"okay okay, ya know what? Fine."
Archer (2009)
"Well, there is a small problem there."
Archer (2009)
"And fifty times twenty -- I think we're probably"
Archer (2009)
"a little closer to nineteen and a half?"
Archer (2009)
"One, what the hell is that thing?"
Archer (2009)
"Mmkay, two, how can you eat a pound of"
Archer (2009)
"never felt better! I hope that lasts."
Archer (2009)
"I'm sure it will, okay here's the dilly"
Archer (2009)
"to nineteen kilos even, so I'll just take back"
Archer (2009)
"And since the coke's in the shape of"
Archer (2009)
"a Poppin' Fresh costume, and taintsweaty,"
Archer (2009)
"Can I finish? Can I finish?"
Archer (2009)
"- wouldn't bring any guns... - We didn't,"
Archer (2009)
"- not even my underwear gun. - I gave mi palabra."
Archer (2009)
"we're gonna go ahead and take the cocaine and the money."
Archer (2009)
"- Goddammit. - And so, right about here"
Archer (2009)
"is the part where I hold you responsible."
Archer (2009)
"And I'll take the fondue set. Because you were a total"
Archer (2009)
"Just because it's from the outlet store doesn't mean --"
Archer (2009)
"- Ramón! - What?"
Archer (2009)
"Wait, you don't think this is my fault?!"
Archer (2009)
"- for rational? - Racional."
Archer (2009)
"- Goddammit. - What was loco"
Archer (2009)
"- was trusting you! - How can you say that?!"
Archer (2009)
"Alright, uno rampageeo! Okay, Lana,"
Archer (2009)
"Votes we cut our losses and go home."
Archer (2009)
"While reminding you, seemingly unnecessarily,"
Archer (2009)
"- Oh, you were serious? - Alright, I'm going home,"
Archer (2009)
"Scotch. And also maybe"
Archer (2009)
"post-traumatic stress disorder, from listening to --"
Archer (2009)
"- Carol? - Yep yep yep!"
Archer (2009)
"Bedrooms, bathrooms, bathrooms, other bathrooms,"
Archer (2009)
"- Ow! - How is she singing so..."
Archer (2009)
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