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Clips from Seinfeld - The Pilot (S04E04)

"- That's what butlers do. - But I don't want to."
Seinfeld
"Jerry, my house is a pigsty. Come on."
Seinfeld
"- Yeah? - It's Elaine."
Seinfeld
"- I need more Pledge. - More Pledge?"
Seinfeld
"I just bought two cans last week, and I don't have any wood here."
Seinfeld
"Hello."
Seinfeld
"Hello."
Seinfeld
"What's all this about?"
Seinfeld
"You went out with my butler? Who said you could go out with my butler?"
Seinfeld
"- Why do I need your permission? - Because he's my butler."
Seinfeld
"How could anyone not like him?"
Seinfeld
"He's a member of our health club, isn't he?"
Seinfeld
"Yeah."
Seinfeld
"You know, that Kim Novak had some big breasts."
Seinfeld
"You ever notice a lot of butlers are named Jeeves?"
Seinfeld
"You know, I think when you- When you name a baby Jeeves..."
Seinfeld
"...you've pretty much mapped out his future, wouldn't you say?"
Seinfeld
"Not much chance he's gonna be a hit man, I think, after that."
Seinfeld
"I'm terribly sorry, sir, but I'm going to have to whack you."
Seinfeld
"Yeah."
Seinfeld
"Oh, wow, that was great."
Seinfeld
"That show was so funny."
Seinfeld
"It was really funny. I'm not just saying that because I know you."
Seinfeld
"All right. Well, let's go out and celebrate."
Seinfeld
"- That was so good. - Come on, let's eat something."
Seinfeld
"I think this will get picked up, George. You're gonna be rich!"
Seinfeld
"- You really think so? - Oh, yeah."
Seinfeld
"- Hello? - Hi, Jerry."
Seinfeld
"To be honest with you, nobody realy knows."
Seinfeld
"He seems to have disappeared."
Seinfeld
"Russell's disappeared?"
Seinfeld
"In any event, I've been made the new president of NBC."
Seinfeld
"...Russell and I did not see eye to eye on many, many projects."
Seinfeld
"You're passing already? The show just ended two minutes ago."
Seinfeld
"Well, I just got the job."
Seinfeld
"What are you-? What are you looking at me for?"
Seinfeld
"Do you realize his obsession with you cost us a TV series?!"
Seinfeld
"I didn't know that he'd fall for me, and I'd drive him insane, I mean-"
Seinfeld
"What happened to him? Where is he?"
Seinfeld
"No one knows."
Seinfeld
"She's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen."
Seinfeld
"...I used to work for NBC, but when I go back to her this time..."
Seinfeld
"...she'll respect me."
Seinfeld
"You'd better get down. They might start firing soon."
Seinfeld
"What is going on here?"
Seinfeld
"Well, well."
Seinfeld
"Hey. What are you two guys doing here?"
Seinfeld
"No, that's- That's- That's why we're here. We're checking things out."
Seinfeld
"- We're checking it out. - Checking it out?"
Seinfeld
"See you back at the office, guys."
Seinfeld
"Fred, Paul, lunch and dinner?"
Seinfeld
"Boy, you guys ought to move in."
Seinfeld
"How about a piece of pie, on me, huh?"
Seinfeld
"You are not gonna get away with this."
Seinfeld
"- Get away with what? - With what?You know what."
Seinfeld
"With the waitresses, how they're all alike."
Seinfeld
"Of course they're alike."
Seinfeld
"They are my daughters."
Seinfeld
"Your daughters."
Seinfeld
"You must be very proud, Mr. Barzakian."
Seinfeld
"And may I say, sir, they're lovely girls. Absolutely lovely girls."
Seinfeld
"It's nice to see such fine, upstanding women..."
Seinfeld
"- ... in gainful employment, Mr. Barzakian. - Here's table for you."
Seinfeld
"- Oh, a table right here. - Peggy."
Seinfeld
"Peggy. All right."
Seinfeld
"- Peggy? - Peggy. His daughter Peggy."
Seinfeld
"Peggy's coming over to serve."
Seinfeld
"One of the family."
Seinfeld
"- My daughter Peggy. - Peggy."
Seinfeld
"- Good to see you. - Hi, Peggy."
Seinfeld
"Thank you very much."
Seinfeld
"- So guess what I gotta do tomorrow. - What?"
Seinfeld
"You should work for Greenpeace."
Seinfeld
"You know, they attack the whalers out on the open sea."
Seinfeld
"Are you crazy?"
Seinfeld
"You take your life in your hands with those nuts."
Seinfeld
"Keep fighting it, matey. Get your head above the water."
Seinfeld
"I've got you, matey."
Seinfeld
"I got you. Matey."
Seinfeld
"I'll remember her name."
Seinfeld
"Elaine Benes."
Seinfeld
"I'll write to her."
Seinfeld
"I'll tell her all about you and what you did out here."
Seinfeld
"Goodbye."
Seinfeld
"Now, I know women often complain about the number of things..."
Seinfeld
"The high heels, the pantyhose, the makeup."
Seinfeld
"...exploring uncharted territories. You think we wanna do these things?"
Seinfeld
"Designing rockets, flying off into space."
Seinfeld
"...goes up to a girl and goes, So did you see me up there?"
Seinfeld
"...and a cream-colored couch."
Seinfeld
"According to most studies, people's number-one fear is public speaking."
Seinfeld
"Your grandmother's in the hospital."
Seinfeld
"Maybe they're not doing it."
Seinfeld
"You're gonna be successful."
Seinfeld
"No matter how bad somebody feels, you can make it worse."
Seinfeld
"Excuse me."
Seinfeld
"Again with the checked out."
Seinfeld
"Good luck on the pilot, Jerry."
Seinfeld
"So, what's going on? We're gonna shoot the pilot..."
Seinfeld
"This guy's perfect."
Seinfeld
"...and I gave them your number."
Seinfeld
"Any questions?"
Seinfeld
"...with steps, completely carpeted..."
Seinfeld
"- Very good. - Very nice."
Seinfeld
"You're the guy from the Calvin Klein underwear ads."
Seinfeld
"I don't understand. We had one date..."
Seinfeld
"Besides that. Look at the waitresses."
Seinfeld
"What physical..."
Seinfeld
"You don't see any handsome homeless."
Seinfeld
"Well, I don't know what it is."
Seinfeld
"He took a biopsy, Jerry. A biopsy."
Seinfeld
"All right, so?"
Seinfeld
"Can't you at least die with a little dignity?"
Seinfeld
"You're not gonna get the job."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, I guess we could do that. At what time?"
Seinfeld
"- What about the dogs? - They're having sex in the hotel room."
Seinfeld
"So the Elaine character is based on someone you know."
Seinfeld
"- What? - Call me..."
Seinfeld
"One hundred percent. I got a big problem."
Seinfeld
"- Thanks a lot. - That's good."
Seinfeld
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