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Clips from Seinfeld - The Pilot (S04E04)

"...maybe you took them with you."
Seinfeld
"- Oh, no, no- - Why would I steal a box of raisins?"
Seinfeld
"No, you wouldn't. Nobody would, you know."
Seinfeld
"It's just that..."
Seinfeld
"...they were missing, and..."
Seinfeld
"Let me give you a word of advice, okay?"
Seinfeld
"...figs or any other dried fruit..."
Seinfeld
"Elaine? Elaine?"
Seinfeld
"What do you want? What can I do?"
Seinfeld
"Is-? Is it...?"
Seinfeld
"Is it my job? Is that what it is?"
Seinfeld
"Would you call me?"
Seinfeld
"Well, why? I- All right, you want-? May I call you?"
Seinfeld
"- ... I am so sorry. - All right, what's your name?"
Seinfeld
"- David Richardson. - Get out, you're fired."
Seinfeld
"- But, Mr. Dalrymple- - Don't talk back to me!"
Seinfeld
"I said, get out. You want me to call the cops?"
Seinfeld
"I make and break little worms like you every day."
Seinfeld
"Do you know where I live?"
Seinfeld
"I could have any woman in this city that I want. Anyone."
Seinfeld
"Doctor called and said I'm not gonna get the results for another two days."
Seinfeld
"Oh, you're fine. There's nothing wrong."
Seinfeld
"I'm the one who's dying."
Seinfeld
"You're fine."
Seinfeld
"This show's gonna ruin my career."
Seinfeld
"- How did I get involved? - What about me?"
Seinfeld
"Now this thing's gonna be a success, and God gives me a terminal disease."
Seinfeld
"The guy playing Kramer threatened me."
Seinfeld
"- Why? - I asked him about the raisins."
Seinfeld
"You mentioned the raisins."
Seinfeld
"That's what I'm trying to find out."
Seinfeld
"I got no peristalsis."
Seinfeld
"- Well, what about bran? - I tried bran."
Seinfeld
"- How about Ex-? - Yeah, had it."
Seinfeld
"Well, my friend..."
Seinfeld
"...it may be time to consider the dreaded apparatus."
Seinfeld
"Hold it right there."
Seinfeld
"If you're suggesting what I think, you're wasting your time."
Seinfeld
"...inserting in that area."
Seinfeld
"Oh, it's not that bad."
Seinfeld
"Yes, it is."
Seinfeld
"Well..."
Seinfeld
"So you going to the taping?"
Seinfeld
"Come on, you gotta go. He's harmless. He's got a little crush on you."
Seinfeld
"Jerry, this is not a crush. This is a complete fixation."
Seinfeld
"He makes me very uncomfortable."
Seinfeld
"I wanna be close to my home base, in case there's any news from the front."
Seinfeld
"No. Pick it up more in the front. It's gotta be higher. Higher."
Seinfeld
"Make a wall. A wall."
Seinfeld
"Sandi, are you in wardrobe?"
Seinfeld
"Wilton Marshall. Remember?"
Seinfeld
"- I can't remember my lines. - Just relax, you'll be fine."
Seinfeld
"You're just like George. He'd do the same thing."
Seinfeld
"- You're just like him. It's amazing. - Help me."
Seinfeld
"George is always saying that."
Seinfeld
"You don't have to worry anyway. It's not live."
Seinfeld
"It's not on till next week. Have a good show."
Seinfeld
"- New sneakers. - New sneakers.Right, that's it."
Seinfeld
"You know, I don't know. I assumed he wouldn't miss it."
Seinfeld
"He hasn't been well."
Seinfeld
"Can I tell you something in confidence?"
Seinfeld
"Yeah, this is George Costanza. I'm- I'm calling for my test results."
Seinfeld
"Negative?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, my God!"
Seinfeld
"Negative's good?"
Seinfeld
"Yes, of course. How stupid of me."
Seinfeld
"Thank you. Thank you very much."
Seinfeld
"What was I worried about?"
Seinfeld
"Listen."
Seinfeld
"...but we got a show to do tonight. Time to pull together as a team."
Seinfeld
"Life's too short."
Seinfeld
"I say, let's let bygones be bygones."
Seinfeld
"If you took the raisins, if you didn't take the raisins..."
Seinfeld
"They weren't even my raisins."
Seinfeld
"...seems like a strange thing to do..."
Seinfeld
"...to walk into a room, audition and walk out with a box of raisins."
Seinfeld
"If you ever want to tell me about it, the door to my office is always open."
Seinfeld
"In the event that I get an office."
Seinfeld
"You'll come in. We'll talk about the raisins. We'll have a nice laugh."
Seinfeld
"...pulled your heart out of your chest now and shoved it down your throat?"
Seinfeld
"Good evening. Welcome to a taping of the new show Jerry."
Seinfeld
"Does everybody know what a pilot is?"
Seinfeld
"...that's the first show before a TV series."
Seinfeld
"And this show will air on Thursday."
Seinfeld
"Are you ready to meet our cast? All right."
Seinfeld
"You sound like a great crowd."
Seinfeld
"Sic semper tyrannis!"
Seinfeld
"- Really? What's it mean? - It means death to tyrants."
Seinfeld
"I could see that."
Seinfeld
"See, now, this is exciting! This is exciting!"
Seinfeld
"- Did I miss anything already? - No, it starts in five minutes."
Seinfeld
"You were there. What's the big deal?"
Seinfeld
"Now it's on TV. It's different."
Seinfeld
"- I told everybody I know to watch it. - Yeah, me too."
Seinfeld
"- Did you hear from Russell? - No."
Seinfeld
"Strange, him not showing up at the taping."
Seinfeld
"Well, well."
Seinfeld
"- You went for the big E, huh? - Wet and wild."
Seinfeld
"- Kramer, sit down. It's about to start. - Oh, yes."
Seinfeld
"Look, a wallet."
Seinfeld
"- A wallet? Let me see that. - Here."
Seinfeld
"- This is it. - How do you like that?"
Seinfeld
"- Hey. - Hey, George."
Seinfeld
"- New sneakers? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"- What do you need new sneakers for? - I like sneakers."
Seinfeld
"How do you decide which ones to wear? I'd go crazy if I had to decide."
Seinfeld
"You're crazy anyway."
Seinfeld
"Why did you eat the top off the muffins?"
Seinfeld
"John, what are you doing? Come back to bed."
Seinfeld
"This show looks interesting."
Seinfeld
"Nevertheless."
Seinfeld
"This is a piece of crap."
Seinfeld
"- Jerry, the commercial's almost over. - All right."
Seinfeld
"You know, I really like this guy playing the butler."
Seinfeld
"- Hello, Charles. - Hello."
Seinfeld
"- Why don't you start in the bedroom. - I'll start in your bedroom."
Seinfeld
"- Hey. - Hey. The butler's here."
Seinfeld
"- I'm not sending him to your house. - Why not?"
Seinfeld
"The judge decreed he'd become my butler, not my friend's butler."
Seinfeld
"Jerry, he is your butler. You can give him any order you want."
Seinfeld
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