You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.

Clips from Seinfeld - The Pilot (S04E04)

"You know the message you're sending with these sweatpants?"
Seinfeld
"- I'm having a conversation here. - Get off the phone."
Seinfeld
"You know I'm waiting to hear from them."
Seinfeld
"- Who was it? - Russell Dalrymple's secretary."
Seinfeld
"All right. Now you're doing something to help me."
Seinfeld
"What if the pilot gets picked up..."
Seinfeld
"...and it becomes a series?"
Seinfeld
"That would be wonderful. You'll be rich and successful."
Seinfeld
"God will kill me before letting me be successful."
Seinfeld
"- He'll never let me be happy. - You don't believe in God."
Seinfeld
"I do for the bad things."
Seinfeld
"Do you hear what you're saying?"
Seinfeld
"God isn't out to get you, George."
Seinfeld
"What-?"
Seinfeld
"- What? - It's like a discoloration. It's white."
Seinfeld
"Yes. Yes, it's white."
Seinfeld
"- Why is that white? - You'd better get that checked out."
Seinfeld
"- Better get that checked out? - I would."
Seinfeld
"What kind of a therapist are you?"
Seinfeld
"I'm telling you I'm scared something will happen..."
Seinfeld
"I'm going, baby. I'm going!"
Seinfeld
"- Where? - Right here."
Seinfeld
"Get out of here, it's nothing."
Seinfeld
"- Oh, my God. - Yeah, it's all white."
Seinfeld
"It's all white, Jerry. It's all white."
Seinfeld
"I'd get that checked out."
Seinfeld
"If I don't, nothing will happen. If I go, he might find something."
Seinfeld
"- Whatever it is. - You think it's something?"
Seinfeld
"I hate these bums with their rags."
Seinfeld
"No, no, no, I don't want it. Get away. Get away. Get away from my car."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, I think I see it. It's like a..."
Seinfeld
"...white discoloration."
Seinfeld
"What do you think it is?"
Seinfeld
"It's like a white discoloration."
Seinfeld
"He must be worried about the fall schedule."
Seinfeld
"- It's a real bear. - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"...then it's gonna be on TV the next week?"
Seinfeld
"He'll be auditioning for the role of George."
Seinfeld
"- How you doing? - Hey, Mark, how are you?"
Seinfeld
"They've gotta be kidding."
Seinfeld
"And I'll be reading Jerry's part."
Seinfeld
"Anyone call for Vandelay Industries?"
Seinfeld
"- No, why? - Listen to me."
Seinfeld
"I told the unemployment office I was close to a job with them..."
Seinfeld
"When you answer the phone, you've got to say, Vandelay Industries."
Seinfeld
"- I'm Vandelay Industries? - Right."
Seinfeld
"- What is that? - You're in latex."
Seinfeld
"What do I do with latex?"
Seinfeld
"This is Michael Barth, another George."
Seinfeld
"- Hi, Michael. - How you doing?"
Seinfeld
"- Everything all right? - I just came from the podiatrist."
Seinfeld
"What are we looking at? Is this guy a real loser?"
Seinfeld
"No, not a loser."
Seinfeld
"Let's start with the second scene. You have it?"
Seinfeld
"So?"
Seinfeld
"He had his hands, you know..."
Seinfeld
"- ... and he was- - He was what?"
Seinfeld
"Well, he was, you know- He was touching and rubbing."
Seinfeld
"That's a massage."
Seinfeld
"- Hi. - Hi, how you doing?"
Seinfeld
"Melissa is reading for Elaine."
Seinfeld
"It's like a bald convention out there."
Seinfeld
"No, you didn't, he knows he's bald."
Seinfeld
"So how about that guy wearing sweatpants?"
Seinfeld
"Is that for the part, or does he walk around like that?"
Seinfeld
"I'll read with her."
Seinfeld
"That look you just gave me."
Seinfeld
"Thank you. Thank you very much."
Seinfeld
"- How you doing? - Good."
Seinfeld
"...with pillows."
Seinfeld
"Like ancient Egypt."
Seinfeld
"How are you gonna be comfortable like that?"
Seinfeld
"Tom, that was terrific. Thank you for coming in."
Seinfeld
"- Bye. - Okay. Thank you. Take it easy."
Seinfeld
"I thought he was really good, very funny."
Seinfeld
"What happened to the raisins?"
Seinfeld
"Yeah, there was a box of raisins there."
Seinfeld
"Did he just steal the raisins?"
Seinfeld
"You think he stole them?"
Seinfeld
"This is Martin Van Nostrand."
Seinfeld
"- What are you doing here? - You two know each other?"
Seinfeld
"Wait a minute. I know you."
Seinfeld
"That's true."
Seinfeld
"I saw Joe DiMaggio in Dinky Doughnuts again."
Seinfeld
"But this time..."
Seinfeld
"Where's the bathroom?"
Seinfeld
"Be right back."
Seinfeld
"Sorry, buddy. Full house."
Seinfeld
"Sorry. Customers only."
Seinfeld
"Very talented young actress."
Seinfeld
"- Really? - Yes."
Seinfeld
"She was in the Iditarod. Got to the finish line, just kept going."
Seinfeld
"She's got the dogs with her in the hotel room."
Seinfeld
"No, he didn't show up."
Seinfeld
"You know..."
Seinfeld
"...I'm a little bit worried about him."
Seinfeld
"...two months ago."
Seinfeld
"Am I that charming and beautiful?"
Seinfeld
"Ever since this new owner took over, the service here is really slow."
Seinfeld
"Yeah. Have you noticed anything else that's..."
Seinfeld
"...different since the new management?"
Seinfeld
"They're putting a little lemon in the tuna. I love that."
Seinfeld
"Yeah?"
Seinfeld
"I mean, look at this."
Seinfeld
"Yes. I would say."
Seinfeld
"What's going on here? How is this possible?"
Seinfeld
"Hi. Excuse me. Who does all the hiring of waitresses here?"
Seinfeld
"He does. We're looking for another girl if you know anyone."
Seinfeld
"You know what? That's discriminatory."
Seinfeld
"That is unfair. Why should these women have all the advantages?"
Seinfeld
"They get all the attention from men. They get all the waitress jobs too?"
Seinfeld
"Hey, that's life. Good-looking men have the same advantage."
Seinfeld
"Oh, yeah. Yeah."
Seinfeld
"I'm gonna have to take a biopsy on this."
Seinfeld
"- A what? - A biopsy."
Seinfeld
"- A biopsy? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"Cancer? Is it cancer? Do I have cancer?"
Seinfeld
"- What'd he say? - He didn't know what it was."
Seinfeld
"When I asked him about cancer, he didn't say, Get out of here."
Seinfeld
"That's what I wanted to hear, Cancer? Get out of here."
Seinfeld
Show more clips